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Men, please tell me what has put you off a woman instantly and forever, very early on. I want to put a bloke off.

Women, if you know of something that would put a bloke off instantly, please share.

Thanks.

Two Owls In Love

What is it with the most interesting people not living here or at least near me?
Karma is kinda rough sometimes, isn't?

We had a bad start involving a turned over dustbin. A few days later, while both of us were guests at a barbecue hosted by a mutual friend, we got along well enough to venture onto a dinner date a few days later and we discovered that we have more in common than what we suspected.

We are spending more and more time together and amazingly, we don’t make preset dates anymore. When I want to go somewhere, I simply walk across the road to fetch her and off we go. Likewise, when she wants to do something, she’ll just walk into my place, say so and we do it. Everything happens spontaneously and it is as if we’ve known each other for years, while in fact, it is only a very short time.

Somehow, without even discussing it, we became an item… and all those around us think so too.

The other amazing thing is that, during that barbecue, fairly early on, she mentioned very casually that after her stormy marriage, she will not easily get involved with somebody again and that she needs time and space to get her life back in order. Yet, as we grew closer, not once did she repeat that statement. In fact, I think that I got all the encouragement that a modern and decent woman would allow herself.

With the exception of that ‘horrible’ Yorkshire accent which I sometimes battle to understand (Molly suggested sub-titles ) and her inability to make a decent curry , she is everything I can expect in a woman; she is neat, attractive, sexy, intelligent, affectionate, adaptable, honest, and has many other good virtues. And apart from involving me in her life, she takes an interest in what I’m doing.

She can even bait a fishhook, rack pool balls, and pour a decent brandy. But jokes aside, I could very easily fall in love with her; if I’m not that already but still in denial. But even if I’m not in love with her, I’m very fond of her and I don’t really care what we do, as long as she enjoys it as well.

Yet, the future is unclear. She has to work another two years before she can retire with a decent pension and that is where the uncertainty starts. What will happen then? During our conversation at that first barbecue, she also mentioned that she is considering going back to the UK. Now, that is the one topic that I have avoided since and she did not bring it up either.

I don’t want her to go back but I cannot see my way open to influence her to stay. I feel that she has to make up her own mind; for if things go sour later, as they often do, she’ll tell me that I told her to stay. I know that I should grab the bull by the horns and ask her if she was serious about going back - and I would; if only I knew what to do if she still planned to return to her country.

Do I enjoy it while it lasts or do I take a smaller knock now to avoid a bigger knock later?


For those who don't know how this started, look at this.

Saw a seriously dishy guy today during long airport wait - our eyes met, we half-smiled, did that thing, you know, where you widen your eyes slightly oooh you look interesting. He was with someone, though, her back turned, very slender, VERY brown. When she turned round she was so sunbeaten and wrinkled she looked 90 but the main thing that spoiled her looks was the fading black eye.

Funny, he suddenly didn't look so good either.

I met a surprising number of women on this holiday who moved to Spain with a guy, it went sour, but they've stayed. Also met a couple who met online 9 years ago, married, and look great and happy. I mention that because they were a little older than I am now when they met. Nice to know it can happen and there ARE keepers out there!

That sort of makes up for the thumpers. That's why I told both stories.

Finally put together my wishlist - 14 items

Before you shout, there's nothing on there which I don't offer in return, or something of equal value (well, in my opinion)

I tested it by checking it against the men that have already been in my life. One fell flat for not having an original thought since he turned 40. One had disastrous core values. Etcetera, etcetera, and as the King said, etcetera. Main thing, the list is WORKING.

What's the most important thing on yours?

This is a blog to all the faceless profiles.

There seems to be an inconsistency in the reasoning as to why people join a DATING site then dont present the feature that is most likely to attract a date!

Yeah!, Yeah! .... Heard all the excuses.... “I feel vulnerable”, “I only attract scammers or people old enough to be my parent or young enough to be one of my children” etc, etc, etc...

What are you afraid of? Plenty of people seem to get along just fine with pictures posted ...so come out into the light, lets us all get a look at you, you never know, you may even get a date!

I AM a Syrian and i still her in Syria with my family .my seek mother and my wife and tow daughters ..i ask you good people in all the world to help me and my family get out her where is war an hell.

I now take paying guests and I've had one here for a couple of weeks now and I might be turning into one of those slightly batty types who think every man who greets them politely is about to attack them, or something. He's charming, attractive, and very attentive. He's always been chatty but when my buddy was here it was impossible to avoid him because we were sitting out most of the time, and we both teased him a bit. Beginning to wish we hadn't.

He's really younger - mid 30s. So it's ridiculous to think he is chatting me up and I know that. But every time I go onto the terrace to have a cig he appears 2 seconds later and wants to talk and talk and talk and I eventually have to make an excuse and go back inside because he doesn't stop talking otherwise and it isn't just a guy talking to a wise old owl, it's - well, put it this way, if he was 20 years older, this would be a very different kind of blog. If I mentioned it at all.

I do know lots of men literally can't stop themselves flirting with any female between 10 and 100, it's a reflex and they don't know how to talk to women without flirting. Also some men would quite cheerfully take on a dotty old broad temporarily if there was a profit in it, or he really could quite literally be a bit lonely and would rather practice his English than his Spanish (neither is his home language). He could even think I am as funny and good company as he keeps telling me I am. However, the more he says it, the more I think hmm, really?

The upshot is that I am sitting inside rather than enjoying my own cool terrace in this crashing heat and yes the advice I have been given is set better ground rules with the next long-stay guest, or lock off part of the terrace for myself, and I will, next time. But I have 10 days still to get through and whether I'm an idiot or not, I feel uncomfortable and I don't know what to do about it.



And I shall probably delete this blog, by the way. It embarrasses me.

With a week away from Christmas ,
Most of us are Christmas shopping.
They say its more blessed to give than to receive.
But
what gift would you like to receive from that "special person " ?