Broken Model

by loriilondon, Greater London, England, UK

Apr 2012 813 Views 8 comments

Broken Model

Author: lorii

Torn photos lay around me
Sticking my head on new bodies
Starving myself just to be skinny
Wishing I didn’t have to, but there never is too thin
I went from a size 12 to a size 8
But I still was fat, still mentally overweight
Surviving on water was not surviving at all
But I was trapped in a mental prison and I couldn’t break the wall
I was jealous of the pretty girls, they had it all
They were so skinny without even trying
Every time I tried it was like my Caribbean roots kept defying
My thighs still fat
Bottom still big
But as my chest contracts you could see my ribs
Reflecting a 21st century view
Size 0 was the only size I wanted to get to.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Posted: Apr 2012

About this poem:

Well my first poem im posting so be nice :)

make sure you comment, i'd love to know what you think, even if you hate it lolz.

Since posting it people wanted to know why i wrote it

I was born in Bath, where i was from most of the girls were skinny, i always tried to become something i wasnt inorder to fit in. I was ashamed of being different and the more i tried to mirror someone else was the more i became weak. weak in my mind, selfesteem and self pride. But i am now a healthy size 10 :) Thanks for reading x

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Comments (8)

FellsmanLake District, Cumbria, England UKApr 22, 2012

Hi lorii

Anorexia is a scourge of our times, and you deftly cover the mental issues that compel suffers to crave unnaturally skinny bodies.

A very topical first poem, and the reader is never sure whether in these cases the write is biographical or based on observation of others, I hope in your case it is the latter.

Well done...

Fellsman

loriiOPlondon, Greater London, England UKApr 22, 2012

Thank you very much :) I'm glad you liked it

loriiOPlondon, Greater London, England UKApr 23, 2012

Well yeah, it's all about opinions in the end.Can be really depressing if your ideal self is far from your actual looks.

gnj4uBoston, Massachusetts USAApr 23, 2012

Hi, loril,
But I still was fat, still mentally overweight... As your poem so poignantly paints, mis-perception of self is a complex phenomenon. Since, beginning with was trapped..., Broken Model is written in the past tense, there is hope that a 21st century view can change for the better!

loriiOPlondon, Greater London, England UKApr 24, 2012

Thats very true. i actually wrote this poem recently amd i feel that because its a deep topic people dont want to share their feelings on it. feel free to write what you think.

OndosSydney, New South Wales AustraliaApr 24, 2012

Let your message be read!

Bravo!

loriiOPlondon, Greater London, England UKApr 28, 2012

Thank you very much :)

DementiaBelmont, Mississippi USAJul 30, 2012

I use to want to be skinny. Seems guys with slimmer frames had more chances with a woman. But over the years I accepted who I am. And though I may not be everyones type I know my heart and how beautiful I am on the inside. And that's where true beauty lies. Never try to be like someone else. Always be yourself and stand up for who you are inside. Be you cause individuality is what makes a person.