Long distance. He hesitates. Should I give him deadline? (187)
patmacglasgow, Strathclyde, Scotland UK730 Threads 6 Polls 9,662 Postsmorgan5: Excuses, Excuses
Might just have to fly out there and smack someones BUTT
morgan5: Excuses, Excuses
I'm with you Morgan, I reckon that Patmac is just piking out...
If its not the weather... twill be some other excuse...
patmac: Might just have to fly out there and smack someones BUTT
Oh please serene56: Sorry can't seem to get this stoopid smile off my face
How are you sweetness
How are you sweetness
good...missing my Koala
Merriweather: I'm with you Morgan, I reckon that Patmac is just piking out...
If its not the weather... twill be some other excuse...
If its not the weather... twill be some other excuse...
Hello hun 
well we ALL know what these men are like 
JSuburbia: good...missing my Koala
how about yourself?patmac: Might just have to fly out there and smack someones BUTT
Ah... gotcha motivated hey??? I hope your smacking Morgans butt cos I have seen the size of your hands...
JSuburbia: good...missing my Koala
Awwww, come 'ere you
Merriweather: I'm with you Morgan, I reckon that Patmac is just piking out...
If its not the weather... twill be some other excuse...
Get on the SKYPE Mrs I will show you my backyard Santa is parked right outsideIf its not the weather... twill be some other excuse...
serene56: Awwww, come 'ere you
morgan5: Hello hun well we ALL know what these men are like
Hi Hun, Yeah, we sure do.... Merriweather: Ah... gotcha motivated hey??? I hope your smacking Morgans butt cos I have seen the size of your hands...
Merriweather: That would be right... I doesn't snow in Perth, any more than it does Adelaide... , but I reckon I'd be fascinated...
I bet you were secretly proud that you could show another soul something different... well done...
I bet you were secretly proud that you could show another soul something different... well done...
I was feeling to cold to feel proud
It was kinda facinating however..because it's something I deal with every winter....She couldn't stay out there long enough...Good memory for sure of the time I was with her.
lady it was fun with him, thats all he takes it as move on.
plsbereal: Hello CS folks!
I am in a weird situation. Well, at least to me it is weird and I have no clue what to do.
I met this guy in the US. We dated since June and in October I had to leave to my home country. Love was (is) strong and we didnt want to lose each other and decided to get back together.
He told me to wait till we figure out what to do.
Time is going and still nothing. I ask him if he has any idea of what we are going to do, he says "i am working on it" or "we will talk about it later". It does hurt me. He doesnt look like he is fooling. Probably he is an indecisive type and it takes hi long time to become ready for something. But what about me? I am tired of this distance and I am tired of him having no idea what we gonna do.
I just thought i am going to give him a deadline (yes , kinda weird choice of the word, but still) early January. Early January I want him to tell me he is coming to meet my family, early january is the deadline for him to elaborate a plan and everything.
my question is should I give him such deadline or should i leave it as is ?
i am feelling lost
I am in a weird situation. Well, at least to me it is weird and I have no clue what to do.
I met this guy in the US. We dated since June and in October I had to leave to my home country. Love was (is) strong and we didnt want to lose each other and decided to get back together.
He told me to wait till we figure out what to do.
Time is going and still nothing. I ask him if he has any idea of what we are going to do, he says "i am working on it" or "we will talk about it later". It does hurt me. He doesnt look like he is fooling. Probably he is an indecisive type and it takes hi long time to become ready for something. But what about me? I am tired of this distance and I am tired of him having no idea what we gonna do.
I just thought i am going to give him a deadline (yes , kinda weird choice of the word, but still) early January. Early January I want him to tell me he is coming to meet my family, early january is the deadline for him to elaborate a plan and everything.
my question is should I give him such deadline or should i leave it as is ?
i am feelling lost
Have not read the whole thread...
But... within 2 months you're having doubts??
Doesn't sound too strong from your side of it either...
What are you going to do?? What do you want to happen?? I doubt you'll find a guy that will go live in Kazachstan... But what are you doing towards making things happen...
plsbereal: Hello CS folks!
I am in a weird situation. Well, at least to me it is weird and I have no clue what to do.
I met this guy in the US. We dated since June and in October I had to leave to my home country. Love was (is) strong and we didnt want to lose each other and decided to get back together.
He told me to wait till we figure out what to do.
Time is going and still nothing. I ask him if he has any idea of what we are going to do, he says "i am working on it" or "we will talk about it later". It does hurt me. He doesnt look like he is fooling. Probably he is an indecisive type and it takes hi long time to become ready for something. But what about me? I am tired of this distance and I am tired of him having no idea what we gonna do.
I just thought i am going to give him a deadline (yes , kinda weird choice of the word, but still) early January. Early January I want him to tell me he is coming to meet my family, early january is the deadline for him to elaborate a plan and everything.
my question is should I give him such deadline or should i leave it as is ?
i am feelling lost
yes give him a deadline so you can move on togeatherI am in a weird situation. Well, at least to me it is weird and I have no clue what to do.
I met this guy in the US. We dated since June and in October I had to leave to my home country. Love was (is) strong and we didnt want to lose each other and decided to get back together.
He told me to wait till we figure out what to do.
Time is going and still nothing. I ask him if he has any idea of what we are going to do, he says "i am working on it" or "we will talk about it later". It does hurt me. He doesnt look like he is fooling. Probably he is an indecisive type and it takes hi long time to become ready for something. But what about me? I am tired of this distance and I am tired of him having no idea what we gonna do.
I just thought i am going to give him a deadline (yes , kinda weird choice of the word, but still) early January. Early January I want him to tell me he is coming to meet my family, early january is the deadline for him to elaborate a plan and everything.
my question is should I give him such deadline or should i leave it as is ?
i am feelling lost
If you put pressure on a person too much at times, they will retreat and perhaps question, is this the person I really want to be with, due to all the hurdles that have to be crossed, given you are from two completely different countries.
lucynad: hello plsbereal,
i, personally, find it hard to give advices...
i think your desires are understandable...
what i don't understand is why it is only him that is supposed to work on it...
aren't you (you and him) supposed to work on it together?
and i also think that you (always you and him) need more than one plan...more like plan A, B and possibly even C...
i, personally, find it hard to give advices...
i think your desires are understandable...
what i don't understand is why it is only him that is supposed to work on it...
aren't you (you and him) supposed to work on it together?
and i also think that you (always you and him) need more than one plan...more like plan A, B and possibly even C...
JSuburbia: So a man's income is one of the things you base whether or not you will have a relationship with him?
LOL, yes dear.
morgan5: thats what I don't get one minute women want equality next its all up to him?
To me its a joint thing with equal responsibility
To me its a joint thing with equal responsibility
Equality does not necessarily equal sameness.
Weimarlady: LOL, yes dear.
Equality does not necessarily equal sameness.
Sorry but to me thats sounds like 'Want your cake and eat it' jmo Equality does not necessarily equal sameness.
morgan5: Sorry but to me thats sounds like 'Want your cake and eat it' jmo
Sounds about right for a few "ladies " i once knew
morgan5: Sorry but to me thats sounds like 'Want your cake and eat it' jmo
Sounds about right for a few "ladies " i once knew
patmac: Sounds about right for a few "ladies " i once knew
Hiya Pat Just don't think we can always except to have everything we want given to us, and play yhe female card when it suits. morgan5: Hiya Pat Just don't think we can always except to have everything we want given to us, and play yhe female card when it suits.
Just to be serious for a change I honestly believe in give and take in all aspects of any relationship. At times one partner will need more than the other. It always works out 50/50 in the end but as always certain folk need more support in different areas. OOOOOO that hurt me serious 
y the way -8 tonight bloody cold outside
patmac: Just to be serious for a change I honestly believe in give and take in all aspects of any relationship. At times one partner will need more than the other. It always works out 50/50 in the end but as always certain folk need more support in different areas. OOOOOO that hurt me serious y the way -8 tonight bloody cold outside
It´s 14 degrees C here this evening, but only 11 degrees forecast for tomorrow evening, (22 during the day) brrrrr!
plainlyjune: no deadlines. I mean no need to give him a deadline. But you can give yourself a deadline, to decide whether you want to continue waiting. Take other things into consideration and build a life without him in it. A contingency plan of sorts. Whether he makes it to you or not, you have a life to keep you grounded.
Should you decide to give him an ultimatum, be ready for the worst. Lots of people don't work well under pressure. But i do hope you achieve your goals.
Should you decide to give him an ultimatum, be ready for the worst. Lots of people don't work well under pressure. But i do hope you achieve your goals.
plsbereal: Hello CS folks!
I am in a weird situation. Well, at least to me it is weird and I have no clue what to do.
I met this guy in the US. We dated since June and in October I had to leave to my home country. Love was (is) strong and we didnt want to lose each other and decided to get back together.
He told me to wait till we figure out what to do.
Time is going and still nothing. I ask him if he has any idea of what we are going to do, he says "i am working on it" or "we will talk about it later". It does hurt me. He doesnt look like he is fooling. Probably he is an indecisive type and it takes hi long time to become ready for something. But what about me? I am tired of this distance and I am tired of him having no idea what we gonna do.
I just thought i am going to give him a deadline (yes , kinda weird choice of the word, but still) early January. Early January I want him to tell me he is coming to meet my family, early january is the deadline for him to elaborate a plan and everything.
my question is should I give him such deadline or should i leave it as is ?
i am feelling lost
I am in a weird situation. Well, at least to me it is weird and I have no clue what to do.
I met this guy in the US. We dated since June and in October I had to leave to my home country. Love was (is) strong and we didnt want to lose each other and decided to get back together.
He told me to wait till we figure out what to do.
Time is going and still nothing. I ask him if he has any idea of what we are going to do, he says "i am working on it" or "we will talk about it later". It does hurt me. He doesnt look like he is fooling. Probably he is an indecisive type and it takes hi long time to become ready for something. But what about me? I am tired of this distance and I am tired of him having no idea what we gonna do.
I just thought i am going to give him a deadline (yes , kinda weird choice of the word, but still) early January. Early January I want him to tell me he is coming to meet my family, early january is the deadline for him to elaborate a plan and everything.
my question is should I give him such deadline or should i leave it as is ?
i am feelling lost
My grandmother used to tell me: "When a man says he doesn't know what he wants, it's usually because he doesn't want what he has." She hasn't been wrong yet.
I'm not saying he won't move, or that he's a bad guy - after all, it's a big ask, to move your entire life to another country. I wouldn't hopld my breath on this one. JMO.
ultimatums and deadlines never work......if he loves you and wants you to be with him then you will KNOW 
......and he will do everything he can to make it happen......if hes lukewarm about it then maybe its just not meant to be
i truly hope things work out for you
......and he will do everything he can to make it happen......if hes lukewarm about it then maybe its just not meant to be i truly hope things work out for you
daisy333: My grandmother used to tell me: "When a man says he doesn't know what he wants, it's usually because he doesn't want what he has." She hasn't been wrong yet.
Wish I had known your grandmother, sounds like a wise woman.
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