Don't keep thinking about the bad experiences of the past. Turn the page. Smile and be confident of your abilities to be a friendly person and an asset in a future relationship. People set goals when they are young. When these goals fail to materialize they quickly label themselves as failures. Every day represents a new opportunity. Go forth and mingle on line. The future belongs to you.
Time can heal all that ails you. Without new opportunities however time serves as a medium for you to review over and over your negative experiences in your mind. These unpleasant thoughts sometimes stay with you forever.
Beauty is only skin deep. Personality and trust are the main issues. If you cannot communicate with each other; there will be problems. Smoking, alcohol, gambling and drugs are bad news for anyone. Even after you are married you cannot take each other for granted and have to keep the spirit of romance alive. People have to communicate with each other. Words have a way of telling the other person you care about them. Caring not humor is the core for success for any relationship. People need to be patient and not drop people out of their lives too quickly.
You are not too young to make these comments listed above based upon observation. Intelligence is a great gift.
Men are not looking for beach babes. They are looking for mates based upon compatibility. Physical attraction is a factor; not the only factor. Many beautiful women are not intelligent. Their interests are narrow and superficial.
As a young person time is still on your side. However without social contacts you lack experience in seeing both good and bad behavior patterns of eligible men. If you find someone you like later in life you may hang on too long if the relationship is going badly for you because you have no one to fall back on and cannot admit to yourself you made a mistake. Men try to attract women by humor, money, appearance, social experience, and ambition. No one man has all the qualities a woman is looking for. A woman has to be satisfied with a glass 75% full. Loneliness is the prize for those old in years and weak in spirit. The more experience you can list on your social portfolio the greater your chances for success.
Giving is very important to fill up the empty box. Everyone wants love to develop quickly. It doesn't work that way. Patience, trust, and time are the ingredients for success.
Good luck! Everyone has to work to make a relationship successful. Don't go looking for perfection. It doesn't exist. Count your blessings and go from there.
Nice poem. The problem is you try hard to be yourself. You get pushed aside by many people before you find some diamonds in the rough. Time moves on a quick pace. You try hard to be happy. There is not always enough patience to keep your emotional feelings in balance. You don't want to be a bad guy; yet you find yourself trying to keep from being too nice or acting desperate.
No one is perfect. If you continue to push aside a candidate for your love for one small reason or another YOU will be alone for the rest of your life.
You divide your contacts into three categories; the one your interested in, those who wish to be pen pals, and those who disappear after one or two contacts. Too many women are eliminated for one of several reasons. Then YOU have to be patient till new arrivals show up for your scrutiny.
Given up on finding love in 2010. However we all start out even once again in 2011. Circle the wagons and examine your strategy. Maybe fine tuning is all you need to move forward in the new year.
The grass may not appear to be greener on the other side of the fence during the holidays. However once the holidays are over and done with many of us will look over the other side again and get hit with a pang of jealousy that we are missing out on something deep down that we all cherish and deeply desire.
Whenever you are single it always pays to mingle. You may not be friendly with everyone in your office but connecting with a few people during the holidays is better than not connecting with anyone. Watch your health though. Don't pass along a cold or the flu as a holiday gift.
The worst habit people can have is stating "I can't wait till this project is over (Education, Military Service, Employment). Suddenly they realize they have many things left to do in life and all of a sudden time runs out.
Beauty is only skin deep. Many women on this site try to attract men with their physical allure. Permanent attraction is based upon personality and character. If you can relate to a person and trust them; the possibility exists for a meaningful relationship. Women who are flawed in these areas will never maintain a promising relationship no matter how beautiful they are or how great their bedroom skills are. On the other hand women who view themselves as plain looking should make a greater effort to improve their image through weight reduction, hair styling, better choice of clothing apparel, better hygiene habits, and improved conversational skills. The people who are discriminated against the most in our society are the old folks and those who are overweight. Beauty is a ticket for an introduction and the opportunity to make an initial impression. Beauty alone will not sustain a man's attention; especially with the passing of time.
Do you feel obligated to marry every person who contacts you? Whatever happened to friendship? Open your ears girl and communicate. The generation gap is closed to a degree when people reach out and decide to share information with others. Learning is a lifetime process. Older men offer younger women benefits that the "Club Generation" doesn't possess. When men and women see their relationships constantly fail it is time for a re-evaluation of priorities. Whenever people put obstacles in their path (AGE) their chances for success are minimized. True you may meet some losers but percentages are in your favor if you emphasize quantity over quality.
Beauty is skin deep. Beauty attracts your attention. However not always can it sustain your attention. Communication and personality are much more important. Beauty fades with time. Communication and personality can last forever if natured properly.
Keeping in touch via e mail gives two people an opportunity to get to know each other. Once there is a romantic connection the financial strings on both sides have to loosen up so that the two people can agree on a meeting place and take it from there. They should spend considerable time together (Two Weeks) to decide if they are compatable enough for a long term relationship. Having common interests helps a relationship develop. Patience is a valuable tool in the process. Communicating on a variety of issues (Family, Education, Vocation, Residence, Religion) helps the relationship to prosper. Meeting someone locally is still the ideal situation. However attractive single women live in all four corners of the globe.
If you want a relationship to work; if you are up in years; you go after the girl you are looking for. You no longer have the time to take on charity cases. Rejections may pile up. However you may get lucky or live out your life intact with all available resources available for you alone. The key is to be comfortable in your skin alone then to be stuck in an unhappy relationship or worse an unhappy marriage.
If a man is interested in a woman in a foreign country; if he chooses to travel to visit her he should pay the expenses. If a woman is asked to visit a guy she should pay the expenses. A guy should treat her like a princess for two weeks and pay her expenses back to her home country to announce either "I met the man of my dreams"; or "It is time to start over".
Again Kasih you are a very intelligent woman who should be writing books on social practices in the 21th century.
I sincerely hope my answer will assist in a prompt reduction of the craziness going on inside your head.
Locate places such as restaurants, librarys, city parks to hang out at where there are people around. Slowly initiate conversation with strangers and YOU will find your loneliness slowly evaporating. I too years ago was feeling lonely and useless. I found a few locations where people hang out and soon I was not alone anymore. I am still searching for love but I am much stronger emotionally today than I was back then. GOOD LUCK. I hope things work out for you in a positive way.
In a relationship one side or the other sorry to say wants to dominate instead of cooperate. Getting the upper hand usually signals impending doom for the relationship.
Several times on this website I have established a nice contact via e mail with a lovely girl. I listed my major interests. I shared personal thoughts. I sent her some photos. Suddenly she was gone. My emails remained unanswered. Just because this website is free doesn't mean that selectivity on the part of the ladies will change from their constant slogan of "Make Me Laugh" and "Chemistry" must be present. The more men in your life the greater chances for lasting love. The fewer men in your life the greater the pressure upon your shoulders to make a bad relationship work.
hankharlow Blog Comments (131)
RE: what u really want????
Don't keep thinking about the bad experiences of the past. Turn the page. Smile and be confident of your abilities to be a friendly person and an asset in a future relationship. People set goals when they are young. When these goals fail to materialize they quickly label themselves as failures. Every day represents a new opportunity. Go forth and mingle on line. The future belongs to you.