venere08 Forum Posts (9,996)

RE: Thank You Italy For Your Hospitality....,This Is How We Say Thank´s

I don't hate anyone, Buffy. The word 'hate' comes from your keyboard, not mine. It is that kind of behaviour I don't like. Big difference. And how easy it is, safely sitting in your living room in Georgia. How about you volunteer to go to Lampedusa and help with the rescue efforts?

RE: Adelaide Oyster Bar Get together

p.p.s. the neighbours left after fire was lit!

RE: Adelaide Oyster Bar Get together

They are there, too. It's the home of oysters, after all. No idea what they do. Leave them lying around at the wrong temp??!!

RE: Adelaide Oyster Bar Get together

p.s. couldn't post that one, now could I?





(don't answer, that. I know you would!)

RE: Adelaide Oyster Bar Get together

It was freezing without the fire going. Had to strip the following night when the neighbours got it going!

RE: Adelaide Oyster Bar Get together

Last time I had fresh oysters in Ceduna at the hotel I was staying, I was violently ill. Happened twice. You're not catching me having them again unless I buy them fresh from a fishmonger!

RE: Must We Solve Most or All of Our Issues Before Entering A Relationship?

Yes, there is still a stigma in some quarters. That's why I always take the opportunity to highlight it. So many people are out there silently suffering in one way or another. Chronic stress affects diabetes, weight issues, depression, panic disorders. And let's remember, it's taken years for men, say, to be able to put their hands up and seek help. Let's embrace that.

With people I see, more often than not, the issues brought up by both genders, do at times involve those that show up within their romantic (sometimes not much romance left) relationship, also sometimes existential in nature. Underpinning all the work we do together, is in learning new skills to better promote communication between the two people. We are half way there, if we can talk openly and in a non hurtful manner towards the one we love, being able to share some of our most unsettling of thoughts/feelings. And feel safe to do that.

RE: Need Computer Purchasing Advice

Oh, and the HP Compaq also has the usual built-in mic and webcam, and came with Windows 7 Home Edition.

RE: Need Computer Purchasing Advice

RE: Need Computer Purchasing Advice

Many might scoff, but I have an HP COMPAQ laptop, with 320GB hard drive, wifi, CD/DVD drive...with those shiny, clear screens. It's been around the globe twice, flies with me on fortnightly trips away locally for work, I've dropped it on concrete from 1m up without a case, bounced around from seat to floor of my car, recently survived repeated electrical storm outages in Italy**.
What more can I say? it's a grand survivor!!! It only cost me about US$560 a year ago.

**I bought a new Samsung netbook in Dubai airport, thinking the lappy was dead. But the sales guy took out the batter, then put it back, and lappy worked. it had been grounded by the electrical storm!

RE: HAPPY BIRTHDAY SXC666

Hope you had a fabulous birthday, T.!!

RE: Libya - Latest Updates Part III

The humanitarian effort to rescue Libyans escaping from political persecution/physical harm does not include giving free passage to Tunisians or any other opportunists who can't be bothered going through the normal migration channels. So what if they don't like the fact that 1000's of Libyan refugees are hitting their country? Diddums! They should be sent back to Tunisia....As the Australian government does with illegal immigrants deemed not to be of refugee status. They are sent back to their country of origin(except for a few stray known terrorists who cannot find a country that will have them!!!)

And as for those Tunisian migrants who broke free and escaped - they obviously have a preference for the French Riviera, not the Italian! ...It makes a mockery of the original intent and sentiment. As for the other nations turning their backs, shame on them!!! And what is the UN doing about it??!!

RE: Libya - Latest Updates Part III

Tunisians have historically flooded into Italy. As well as from Morocco. One of my cousins had a Moroccan husband. Gorgeous looking man, too.

Short of installing barbed wire or electric fences (I say that to merely point out the only thing that would physically stop anyone leaving Libya, not to advocate these measures!!!), and no longer provide ferries and so on, the situation will continue as it is.

Once started at all, this kind of thing takes on a life of its own. There was of-course, no plan in place to address all that is now happening. Not sure why the surprise really. What on earth did France, England and the U.S. expect??? Malta and Italy have had little choice. A hypothetical: What if neither in reality, wanted to participate? That was never an option. France has the luxury of refusing? Why??? ....Just saying.

RE: Libya - Latest Updates Part III

p.s. some would say they were from Afghanistan(that will get you a protection visa)but were found to be from Pakistan(no chance of visa), others would say they were from Iraq but were from Iran(not deemed to be dangerous, hence no visa), and so it went on. Many were even schooled in Indonesia before they embarked for our shores, as to descriptions of certain towns, so that when the authorities questioned them, they would be able to bluff their way through. So it took authorities ages to try and verify.

So I guess the Italian parliament as well as its people, are aware of the reality of time and resource commitment that is being thrust upon them. I'd say also with Malta.

RE: Libya - Latest Updates Part III

Sure, thanks. I was confused as to that particular post.
I know that process well, as many years ago, I did some short term work in a detention centre here in the desert in South Australia, where thousands of illegal immigrants were housed. it is a hugely difficult process for the authorities to determine the authenticity of documents, some without adequate documents. It is also a lengthy process. Certainly not one that takes only days, or sometimes even months. Which begs the question as to how these illegals in Malta and Italy can possibly have their status determined so quickly.

RE: Libya - Latest Updates Part III

Knowing what the general Italian sentiment is towards any further influx of refugees/immigrants of any description, I can foresee potential revolt on the streets, not just in parliament.

RE: Libya - Latest Updates Part III

I only say the above, because the authorities are obviously not treating these migrants with any sense of priority. They might have chosen to flee, but they seem not to have been regarded as in any danger. Not sure why? maybe I shouldn't comment. I'm in the dark as to any details. I will only keep making assumptions as I try to fill in the gaps in information. You can only report so much, zeus.

RE: Libya - Latest Updates Part III

I'm a bit confused. Immigrants? Refugees?

How is the status of all those landing in both Malta and Italy, being determined?

RE: Libya - Latest Updates Part III

I can only assume that these 'economic migrants' are only identified as such, once they reach the shores of Lampedusa.
Which means these people are abusing the situation of the Libyan crisis, and hopping on board for the free ride, instead of the normal route of paid passage on a normal boat/plane. Apalling really!

RE: Must We Solve Most or All of Our Issues Before Entering A Relationship?

A note about medication and therapists. Like everything, there are some dreadful therapists around. Just as there are some horrid dentists, doctors, lawyers, accountants, bartenders, waiters, waitresses.....I don't know the experiences that some of the posters here have had with therapy/therapists, however, in the interest of mental health, I feel obliged to say that if anyone is ahving trouble coping with some aspect of their life, and you find that talking to friends/family doesn't help) please do seek some good, professional help. I am one of those the-rapists, and one of the most satisfying things in my life, has been the privelege I've had to be let into people's lives, and to see them move on. In Aussie Land, we do not prescribe medication, though we can recommend through their treating doctor, that they do if there is some crisis. On the odd occasion, both the right (temporary medication) and talking therapy is highly effective.

Funny isn't it? Most of us spend a fortune maintaining/fixing our cars. We spend hundreds sometimes thousands on our bodies, gym membership, personal trainers, creams, potions...But when it comes to looking after our brain, our precious mental health, we scoff.

RE: Must We Solve Most or All of Our Issues Before Entering A Relationship?

Hi Ginger,

I think this might be a case of semantics here, but I would say that if we would not do something for whatever reason, it possibly means we have learned from past situations. I will not contemplate dating any man who has no job, no prospects, little money. I don't have much, but at least as much as I do. I'm not after any man's money. I've had plenty of opportunity to date even a millionaire or two(yep, my friends thought I was crazy not 'going for it'). Been there, done that. My ex had nothing. I didn't care. Love conquers all, right? Wrong. When it later suited him, he tried to take half the house off me, one which had not even become our matrimonial home, and which I had bought with every cent of my own. Yet he was happy to take me to court to try and take it off me.......Would I get into a relationship with a heavy drinker? Nope. A heavy smoker? Nope. Someone with severe mood swings? Nope. A serial womaniser? Nope. I've been with someone with all of these. Sure, it's made me the strong woman I am today. But I don't need to be any stronger, thanks ...

I think a person could be said to have 'baggage' if they make the same bad decisions/choices, time and time again. Like choosing a partner who is an alcoholic, over and over again, making the same bad decisions throughout their life, and never learning or having the insight as to how they keep repeating the same pattern. Or the woman who goes from one abusive relationship to another and has no insight to stop that merry go round, and make better choices for herself.



(Looks like I will most likely be on my own for the rest of my life - me, myself and I....'til death do us part.)

RE: Must We Solve Most or All of Our Issues Before Entering A Relationship?

Yes, I'm with you on the completed bit. A third arm could come in handy, but it would upset my balance. And buying gloves would be such a chore...

Jokes aside, we all have 'baggage'. It's what makes us who we are today. But as you say, if it doesn't adversely affect the relationship, and in fact, could even make you stonger within it, what does it matter to anyone?

Both my grandmothers lived most of their life on their own without their husband for differing reasons(would make a good book one day!lol), so I take inspiration from two of the strongest women I've ever met.


p.s. If you can find it, read the book, 'Widows of Hiroshima'

RE: Must We Solve Most or All of Our Issues Before Entering A Relationship?

Hi Snuggs
There's a lot of that kind of treatment of single people who choose to do things on their own, live on their own, go out/travel on their own.

I was recently in Italy. While I was in no way looked down upon, everyone was truly wonderful to me - I did pick up loud and clear that I was missing an 'accessory'. A man. Even a builder passed comment such as 'next time you come, no doubt you will bring your son, or your father, or...hrrumm...'someone else'. I thought it was funny. Yes, I would love both my father and son to come and stay with me there, and maybe even...someone else but I have no need whatsoever to have to have them there. I am absolutely and blissfully happy there on my own. Several well meaning women kept telling me they would be terrified being in the house on their own despite having lived there all their lives. I was asked by various people, 'Aren't you scared?' 'No, why should I be?' was my answer. My neigbour's husband would say, head shaking, how brave I am. And so it went on...

So I learned that there are 2 things you cannot be seen without in Italy.... A man. Oh, and a good leather handbag!! Methinks the latter might be a universal...

RE: Do you agree with the proposal to permanently evacuate North Queensland?

Pssst, Cuspo...Half of Adelaide is built on fault lines, including the area my parents as well as myself, live in.
Thanks to Colonel Light Yep, a man of vision!

Errrr....aren't we supposed be expecting a major earthquake here this year?

RE: Must We Solve Most or All of Our Issues Before Entering A Relationship?

Relationship 'guru's are not necessarily the answer. But adding tools to one's toolkit, is. No matter what the means.

yet we could just as easily ask, say, how did the asthmatic manage to live a healthy, active life before ventolin, or before the era of organ transplants, or insulin injections, or keyhole surgery, or plastic surgery for burns/crash victims...?

RE: Prospects for peace in Afganistan

Hi tc,
History does keep repeating itself, and lessons are rarely learned, that should be learned...Nonetheless, Afghanistan remains about the poorest country on this earth. War is no longer to be the focus of any country's presence in Afghanistan. While the Australian government's position is not particularly transparent, the ADF's current position appears as follows:

Australia has a growing non-military commitment to the people of Australia is the largest non-NATO contributor of military support to Afghanistan and the 11th largest overall contributor to the International Security Assistance Force.

A key objective of the ADF is to train the Afghan National Army's 4th Brigade as part of the broader international effort to build Afghan army capacity.....Afghanistan, with millions spent on ensuring schools are built, teachers trained, women can give birth safely and clean water is available.....



Unlike some donors, the aid portfolio is not significantly weighted towards Australia's military presence. This is encouraging and suggests that unlike some other donors, AusAID has a more balanced approach to supporting comprehensive aid programming across Afghanistan.

From: 'Aid engagement is due further attention'
Marc Purcell, The Australian October 16, 2010 12:00AM

RE: Must We Solve Most or All of Our Issues Before Entering A Relationship?

RE: Must We Solve Most or All of Our Issues Before Entering A Relationship?

Hi A. A good topic. Thanks for raising the issue. I agree with you that there are some things that can only be addressed by being in relationship. Just as one would treat a fear of driving/flying, without eventually getting your backside inside the car/plane, and put into practice what you learned.

There are some things that one can work on outside of relationship, such as learn basic communication principles, and get to learn about yourself through spending time alone. And feel OK about being alone. Even happy, content... I've met many people who would rather walk on hot coals than be alone. Just some examples. Then ultimately, when you do start a relationship, you are better prepared with having a lil 'toolkit' as it were.

Little gremlins are bound to pop up at any time, usually aided and abetted by some of our various bits of unconscious dynamics. As these crop up, you deal with them. With love, patience, and lots of communication and understanding with the other person. I know with myself, I am prone to sabotage a relationship. It's not so much a matter of if, but when. At the beginning of a relationship, I might say or do something to try and wreck things when all is going smoothly, such as I may push something to its limit, or throw in a silly comment, that even I would wonder, WTF??? Maybe subconsciously, I don't really believe I am loveable. At a conscious level of-course, I think I'm fabulous!!

But if two people are committed to each other, there is nothing that open and loving communication cannot fix. (unless you are dealing with someone aay, with a major personality disorder, then you're screwed!!!)

RE: Adelaide Oyster Bar Get together

Figured that. Had just never known it.
CS is a real education

RE: Adelaide Oyster Bar Get together

Fosters(Beer) = Annie's Lane...shiraz??