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ElegsabiffElegsabiff Blog (358)

9,358 Blog Comments695 Forums358 Blog358 Blogs24 Threads20 Polls14 Books4 Videos3 Games2 Quizzes1 eCards1 eCards1 Tags

Stay digital after you die

Capturing your image on film has only been around since, effectively, 1839 and for the first 50 or so years you'd have had perhaps one photograph taken of yourself in your lifetime, dressed in your best and staring at the camera without smiling.

Now, with selfies, videos, singles websites grin Facebook Instagram Twitter LinkedIn, mobile phones, and any amount of public websites, the average person has hundreds of records, photos, scraps of information, memories of achievements and wonderful times from their lifetimes, especially the last few years.

The link posted below is fascinating but for those who don't like to follow links, Ian Twigg died at the age of 33 and his wife chose to create a digital memorial of him and his life on Facebook, and to start a support group, WAY (Widowed And Young). More people than you would think have got a digital legacy, it's an interesting article.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-36226376


Obvious? Logical? Weird? Maybe you're suddenly inspired to plan your own, create your legend, rather than leave it to chance / family / loved ones...
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Vive la difference - Martian vs Venusian

Words with different Gender Specific Meanings

1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female...... Any part under a car's hood.
Male..... The hook fastener on women's garments.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male..... Playing cricket without a box.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko- mit-ment) n.
Female..... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

Found this on FB during my coffee break, thought you'd enjoy it during yours. Any you can add? coffee
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An introduction to fracking

There's talk of fracking starting down the road, 5 miles from where I live, and I thought what the frack is fracking? Will I like it? So I looked it up.

Fracking is the process of drilling deep into the earth’s surface, then using high-impact liquid to fracture bedrock and bring gas or oil (or anything handy that we find while down there) to the surface.

Neat, tidy, no impact on the surrounding areas whatsoever, and relatively cheap. The US has done a lot of it, the UK wants to try too.roll eyes

So if I want to set up a little fracking in my back yard, here’s my shopping list:

Water. LOTS. Budget on a million gallons for a single well. Fortunately we’re a wet little island and unlikely to run out, but hey, we’re used to hosepipe bans in the summer anyway. So we can well spare the water.

Sand and chemicals to mix – approx. 40 000 gallons of chemicals for that million gallons. Lead, uranium, mercury, ethylene glycol, radium, methanol hydrochloric acid, formaldehyde. Oh, stop looking worried, they may be lethal but don’t worry, they are only released way, WAY below ground level, 10 thousand feet down, under high pressure.

True, the recovered waste fluid is left in open pits to evaporate into the atmosphere, but that’s only 30 to 50% of the fracking fluid anyway. Those who are pro fracking assure us that all the dangerous carcinogenic chemicals know to stay below ground and not come up to evaporate into our air. Just as well, don’t want those around. Bad enough that people have the nerve to smoke within 100 feet of you, risking your health and all.

The rest – 50 to 70% of a million gallons of water - stays below ground, and those chemicals are non-biodegradable. Still, 10 thousand feet down. Not our problem.

Oh, and there might, just might, be the occasional tremor or two. In 2011, energy company Cuadrilla suspended test fracking operations in Lancashire, after two earthquakes of 1.5 and 2.2 magnitude hit the area. However there is no conclusive proof that the high-pressure fracturing of bedrock had any link whatsoever to the tremors.

All in all, we should go for it. Win-win. No risk, no fuss, no mess, practically free for the taking, and what could possibly go wrong?

Excuse me, I have to go pack.
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Selling yourself (edited down to the boasts)

(Edited comment - the blog got 129 comments but some were just playing and some never did get the point. I promised to cut it down to the boasting posts, and now I have. It is a PURELY for fun)

This is your blog. Sell yourself. To hell with false modesty, what others will think, to hell even with reality, tell it like you wish it was and for a while at least, it will be.

The floor is yours.









Er, you say. What?










Okay, a guy took a photo of his foot, published it as a book called 'Putting My Foot Down' (subtitle, A Book Featuring My Foot), author's name 'My Foot'. As soon as it came on line he rounded up a couple of friends to buy it, and bought it himself. 3 sales in 5 minutes shot him straight into the best-seller lists, verified by Amazon. He took a screenshot of himself listed by Amazon as a 'best selling author' and put it on LinkedIn as his profile pic.

Oh, the book isn't still selling. It has 12 reviews, mind, and is doing rather better than mine in the ratings, but is no longer rated a best-seller. But for 10 minutes - he was.









Got it? You have the floor. Sell yourself. Maybe only for as long as it will take someone to go check your profile, BE THE PERSON YOU WANT TO BE. And okay, I'll start. Stick within spitting distance of reality - this is who you really are, in your own private universe. Sell tickets.
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Ginger nut

Being ginger is a bit like being a vampire. You can't go out in sun. You can't see yourself in a mirror, at least until you have painted on some features.

Embedded image from another site


Plus people are a bit afraid of you - that temper - not to mention those rumours about s*xual appetite roll eyes

But yay turns out to be worth it after all! the fact that I am as fit as a flea, can trot up stairs, outwalk the dog, misbehave very enjoyably and have no aches, pains, twinges or arthritis, is thanks to the ginger gene! yay

The good news is that nearly everyone anywhere within range of those naughty Vikings (that's most of the UK and a fair chunk of Europe, and we ended up spreading over most of the world in the centuries since) has a ginger ancestor.

Embrace your inner ginger rolling on the floor laughing guys especially could suddenly find themselves very popular in the baby-making stakes, as women world-wide decide to rope the ginger gene into their future babies laugh

Well of course it may all turn out to be nothing like as exciting as it sounds right now. I'm just chuffed as hell to find there really is an advantage after all to being a ginger nut.
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Happy birthday

Happy birthday to the blurred blogger, Mollybaby, have a fantabulous day and I hope you've taken it off work and are going to have a thoroughly awesome day

teddybear

cheering thumbs up grin yay peace cake party balloons beverage delivery danceline happy birthday
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I want a wife

Map's blog raised a subject I feel strongly on, and he's fine with me stealing the direction it took.

I want a wife. A little woman to do the cooking, housework, laundry, would be heaven. daydream Her evenings would be her own, too, she could go out every night if she liked, no awkward questions when she got home - well, some questions, after all she could also be a wonderful source of research for me, and save me having to go out myself. grin

Does anyone know where to get one? Is there a deposit to be paid, or do you just have to put your name on a waiting list?
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In case no-one told you today

You are loved

You are needed

You are alive for a reason

You are stronger than you think

You are going to get through this

I'm glad you are alive - and don't ever give up.



teddybear
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Lastminute.don't!

Ok this is a cautionary tale because I reckon pretty much all of us have either used lastminute.com or thought about it. Right? Great deals.

Well, I've been happy in the past, so I'm not knocking them (much) (okay I am) but had a Lastminute.com Experience this time which was an eye-opener. We were due to come back with TAP (Air Portugal, known lovingly to all as Take Another Plane) midday today - nice lazy morning, friend taking us to airport, only problem had been that we hadn't managed to do the boarding passes before the holiday. So what's the big deal? We'll have time at the airport to print them off, flight only leaves at 1.30.

However one of the staff at the hotel heard us talking about it and said hmmm, TAP, better safe than sorry, use the hotel pc / printer (by the way, highly highly recommended hotel, Pergola House, a converted Med villa, beautiful). So we ambled off to do that thing.

Embedded image from another site


Odd. Our flight reference is now coming up for a flight before 07h00? I rang Lastminute.don't and they said oh, okay, we'll phone them but you probably should phone too. They gave us two phone numbers, both out of service. Hotel gave us another number and we hung on and hung on and hung on and gave up. Meanwhile I was reading the original booking and here's the warning. In teeny tiny letters it says flights may be subject to alterations of up to 24 hours

Long story short, up at 04h00 to catch flight. Happy 6 hour wait at Gatwick to catch connecting flight to Edinburgh. It could have been the other way round so be warned - if you use lastminute.don't, be careful. If you use TAP, confirm confirm confirm because at no time did they contact us or lastminute.don't to mention that if we pitched up for our flight at 1 we were going to be a little put out.

Oh and still waiting to hear back from lastminute.don't. very mad
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This is me hard at work

I took a cup out of the dishwasher and thought ew, that's not very clean. Then I realized I hadn't actually done a load yet and disaster, I'm out of clean cups.

Out of clean everything. House, clothes, cutlery, crockery - the last week or two has been absolutely manic and my house, never naturally tidy, would be condemned if anyone from Health & Safety walked in sigh

So the obvious first start to tidy / spring clean is to write a blog. Maybe you have some handy short-cuts I should know about, like how to attach a hair-dryer to a duster and make it 20 times as efficient. Or how to strap the vacuum cleaner to the dog and put her to work. 90% of the vacuuming is her shedding anyway very mad

Cranking up the music so I can dance as I dust. I will be back with frequent cups of coffee to restore my energies. Oh bugger I need to buy milk.

wave
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Makes you proud to be British

When we put our minds to it, we can take stupid to an art form.

BBC NORFOLK
Stewart White: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant: I don't know.
Stewart White: I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant:Arm
Stewart White:Correct. And if you're not weak, you're...?
Contestant:Strong.
Stewart White:Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant:Louis
Stewart White:Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant:Frank Sinatra?

LATE SHOW (BBC MIDLANDS )
Alex Trelinski:What is the capital of Italy ?
Contestant:France.
Trelinski:France is another country. Try again.
Contestant: Oh, um, Benidorm.
relinski:Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
Contestant:Sorry, I don't know.
Trelinski:Just guess a country then.
Contestant:Paris.


THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2)
Anne Robinson:Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: - Prison, or the Conservative Party?
Contestant:The Conservative Party.

BEACON RADIO ( WOLVERHAMPTON )
DJ Mark: For 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
Ruth from Rowley Regis: I think I know that one. Is he Jewish?

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
Bamber Gascoyne: What was Gandhi's first name?
Contestant:Goosey?

GWR FM ( Bristol )

Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
Contestant:I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.

RICHARD AND JUDY
Richard:Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
Contestant: Forrest Gump.

LINCS FM PHONE-IN
Presenter:
Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: Barcelona.
Presenter:I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant:I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in Spain ..

JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)

James O'Brien:How many kings of England have been called Henry?

Contestant: Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth .... ER. ER ... Three?


PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)
Phil Wood: What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?

Contestant: Er... .... ...

Phil Wood: It's got two syllables . . . Kor . .

Contestant: Blimey?

Phil Wood: Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run .. . ..

Contestant: (Silence)

Phil Wood:OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . . .

Contestant:Walked?


doh
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What happens

when the chatty, friendly, very interactive singles website you belong to finds out you’ve been writing a book about a chatty friendly very interactive singles website?

Actually, I have no idea. Clarissa - wait for it, wait for it - Rodgers-Briskleigh is about to find out.

How about that name? rolling on the floor laughing

I asked, oh a while back now, for a name that would conjure up a bit of fun, some naughtiness, and that was an almost immediate suggestion from a a very well-known blogger with a very dry sense of humour. I asked if I could credit him and he was, well, evasive. You can guess anyway, right?
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