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And ive got wifi. Im warching Zac Efron as Ted Bundy on Netflix.

Back at the ranch, a very slow week in car sales. Ive found my groove and that seems to be in trucks. I do love the idea of a 4X4 hauling a camper to a remote part of the map. Been considering fishing for my dinner. Ill see about a rod tomorrow. Free food is the best kind.

The boss is aloof and i try to act like nothings occurred. I need this job. The strange thing is, ive got the fight back in me. Its as if i have a clear view and nothing will get in the way. Not even a petty mistaken infatuation. I have to admit being insulted after i revealed my age. Jeez, he was into me until he found out. I cannot be compared by others my “age”.

after a day of mowing, trimming, sweeping, scrubbing and mopping, my fridge didn't make it on the truck.
it's sunday so i can't call Lowes customer service until tomorrow. i wonder what day it's coming?
sigh...............................
i was so excited

Doc says its gonna be ok,
but I really don't like life without my meds, Numbers were all linear when I took my Precious

I might as well write a blog…
So, since I’m trying the sober and alert route, I have been working on my house.

When I first moved here, I was involved with a guy from NJ. I came out of a very controlling marriage so I was happy to wear the pants. Unfortunately, everything began to unravel. He failed to mention an opioid addiction. That coupled with being a mama’s boy left me responsible for everything. Things got worse and I took the couch.

Things began building up. The mail, because I couldn’t pay the bills, the personal belongings being tossed wherever they could fit. My world became a survival of the chaos. And so things progressed until I felt like I lived in an episode of Hoarders. There was no rhyme or reason.

The depression got worse. The drinking got worse until my environment became debilitating.

A few years ago I managed to successfully kick the loser out. Since then, I’ve felt as if I failed miserably and self medicated accordingly.

I took a turn 12 days ago. I have some appliances coming on the 26th and preparing. Rather than just organizing my kitchen and basement, I am organizing my home deliberately.

I have turned a small bedroom into a dressing room. All my shoes and boots go there. I have purchased attractive lidded boxes for my art supplies. I have purchased beautiful rugs in light tones to combat the dark wood trim and floors. I hung some cheerful yellow window treatments for my kitchen. They look great with my vintage, ‘50’s lemon yellow table

I’m tearing out the carpet and laying down vinyl tile for ease of cleaning.

All this work gives me vision and purpose. I’m not doing it to have guests. I’m doing it for me. I haven’t had the urge for a beer. I’m feeling more in control.

If anyone out there needs some motivation for a cleaner house, check out the Secret Slob on YouTube. That woman is great.

The most INSANE traffic EVER! This video was shot entirely in Hanoi, Vietnam. You think traffic is bad in your city?

of days of wonderment, hardly felt
of nights of fulfillment hardly felt
of weeks of wanting, never held
of arms empty, when words are shallow
and thoughts are less than what holds
when life is hard but lovers aren't
and the road is long but the message is short
if relationships could cover miles when notes could not
when gaps are closed with eyes wide open
this is the state of online love

I’m so inclined to text my customer back. The idea of buying a full carat diamond for the price of a 3/4 or 1/2 diamond price at my experience is really ticking me off. Sure, they have a budget. It’s not a mystery that a car salesperson works entirely on a commission. You buyers expect me to make nothing so you get what you want fukc all the rest? Please, get over yourselves and buy what you can afford. I’m sick of it and pretty close to saying it to the next jerk. I would rather starve like I already am than cater to your idiotic sense of entitlement.

My prediction: we will feel the financial effects of the coronavirus by summer.
Factories in China are shut down. They supply parts to the world for automobile manufacturing. Demand is high and there will be shortages for both repairs and new vehicles.

It doesn't stop there.

Let's say that old washing machine of yours needs a new pump and none are to be found. If you cannot salvage one from the junk yard, you could be forced to buy a new washer... that is if your appliance store can get one from their distributor.

Something to think about...

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i love my dopey cat. the "no man" rather than "yes man".
he looks at me with his amber eyes and cries, silently. this action provokes a loving massage on his head and neck with special attention to his ears.
he is rebuffed, yet, minutes later, he makes a bed of me.
the rascal often makes a bed of me when i'm ready for a coffee refill or need a trip to the WC. i could never disturb such a peaceful creature...
i think he must love me.