Comedy Blogs (1,863)

I like this logo.

I first saw this about 10-12 years ago.

Someone decided to have a little fun with McDonald's logo and slogan.

In a former life, I was a member of a site that had chat rooms, private chat, blogs and forums. On a busy Saturday night you could find over 2,000 people logged in, using the system.
One feature they had was to allow members to add comments to other members photos. Usually it was funny or nice comments. Scammers would often post email contact information for others to to get back to them.

One guy named Chotty could be found on every new profile tagging his words to every female in the system. He was famous. Often, it was mentioned when Chotty commented to a bloggers profile and often brought up in a blog. If I recall he was from the 'Deep South' maybe in Georgia or Louisiana. Chotty didn't blog and he didn't post in the forums. His thing in life was tagging photos.

With so many comments, his favorite line was:
"You've got a bangin' booty babygirl!"

I'm not sure how a face photo determined she had a banging booty... but he said it anyway.

‘How about me?’ Man’s Facebook comment puts him behind bars.

A Georgia man’s Facebook comment got him some unwanted attention from law enforcement — ending with an arrest.

On Monday, the Rockdale County Sheriff’s Office in Georgia posted a list of its Top 10 Most Wanted fugitives. That’s when Christopher Spaulding decided to chime in. “How about me,” he wrote in the comments.

Well, turns out that even though Spaulding was by no means one of the most sought-after fugitives in the county, he was still wanted. “You are correct you have two warrants, we are on the way,” the sheriff’s office wrote in response. The Rockdale County Sheriff’s Office’s fugitive unit quickly found Spaulding and arrested him on two warrants for felony violation of probation.

“Our Top 10 is compiled based off of the severity of the charges only,” the sheriff’s office wrote Thursday. “By not being on this list does not mean our Fugitive Unit is not looking for you if you have an active warrant.”

So funny! smh...

An old physician, Doctor Gordon Geezer, became very bored in retirement and decided to re-open a medical clinic.
He put a sign up outside that said: "Dr. Geezer's Clinic. Get your treatment for $500 - if not cured, get back $1,000."
Doctor Digger Young, who was positive that this old geezer didn't know beans about medicine, thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000. So he went to Dr. Geezer's clinic.
Dr Young: "Dr. Geezer, I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me?"
Dr Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from the box 22 and put 3 drops in Dr. Young's mouth."
Dr Young: 'Aaagh! -- This is Gasoline!"
Dr Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your taste back. That will be $500."
Dr Young gets annoyed and goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money.
Dr Young: "I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything."
Dr Geezer: "Nurse, please bring medicine from box 22 and put 3 drops in the patient's mouth."
Dr Young: "Oh, no you don't -- that is Gasoline!"
Dr Geezer: "Congratulations! You've got your memory back. That will be $500."
Dr Young (after having lost $1000) leaves angrily and comes back after several more days.
Dr Young: "My eyesight has become weak --- I can hardly see anything!"
Dr Geezer: "Well, I don't have any medicine for that so, "Here's your $1000 back" (giving him a $10 bill).
Dr Young: "But this is only $10!"
Dr Geezer: "Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500."
*Moral of story* -- Just because you're "Young" doesn't mean that you can outsmart an "old Geezer".

It's been a crazy month with Hurricane Nicole whacking Mar-a-Lago, Trump abandoning TRUTH for a reinstated Twitter account, the judge on the FBI search no longer accepting delays, his accountant testifying against him in his tax fraud case.
I used to see a few news stories daily about the former president, it's more than 6 new ones daily. Did I forget anything? Oh yeah... he's officially campaigning for president in 2024.
Some candidates he supported have failed in the mid-term elections and it's creating a ruckus with the Republican Party with many wanting to distance themselves and not feel the ROT, that's the wRath of Trump.

Sit back and enjoy, we're not where near then end of this roller coaster ride!

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a break from a long-standing tradition, the White House announced that this year's Thanksgiving turkey would not receive a ceremonial pardon from President Joe Biden after it was discovered that the turkey had attended the riot at the U.S. Capitol on January 6, 2021.

"The turkey we had chosen for the occasion has been determined to be completely undeserving of a pardon," said White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre in a media briefing. "The President was very eager to bestow a pardon, but unfortunately, it came to our attention that this turkey participated in the violent attack on the Capitol that attempted to overthrow the government and destroy democracy itself."

The turkey has been returned to police custody.

The Biden administration learned of the scandal after it was presented with photos of the foul fowl wearing a red "Make America Great Again" baseball cap among other Trump supporters and undercover federal agents planted surreptitiously throughout the crowd on the day of the riot. Though other witnesses vehemently argued that the turkey had valiantly attempted to prevent agitators from vandalizing the Capitol and breaching its doors, security camera footage of the MAGA turkey wandering the halls and gobbling in House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's office was considered particularly damning.

"Listen, these dangerous ultra-MAGA birds are a serious threat to our nation, folks," President Biden said in brief remarks about the situation. "They must be dealt with and put in their rightful place, which is on my dinner table. End of speech. Walk away from podium."

At publishing time, all requests made to interview the turkey had been denied. It was reported that the bird was placed in solitary confinement at an undisclosed location as it awaited its execution, brining, and deep-frying without due process.