Here is a list of Comedy Blogs. A Blog is a journal you may enter about your life, thoughts, interesting experiences, or lessons you've learned. Post an opinion, impart words of wisdom, or talk about something interesting in your day. Update your blog on a regular basis, or just whenever you have something to say. Creating a blog is a good way to share something of yourself with others. Reading blogs is a good way to learn more about others. Click here to post a blog.
On this 4th of July
A holiday joke for you.
A difference between George Washington and a mallard duck.
.
.
.
.
.
.
The mallard has ......................................................a bill on it's face,
while George has his face on a $1 bill.
OK, one more. How do American flags greet each other ?
.
.
.
They just..... wave.
However you celebrate today, I hope you have an excellent one.
A difference between George Washington and a mallard duck.
.
.
.
.
.
.
The mallard has ......................................................a bill on it's face,
while George has his face on a $1 bill.
OK, one more. How do American flags greet each other ?
.
.
.
They just..... wave.
However you celebrate today, I hope you have an excellent one.
Oldest Virus In History Still Going Strong...Who's Next??
A virus that causes those infected "to believe without question every groundless story, legend, and dire warning imaginable that pops up in the alleged minds of the spreaders and their facilitators". The usual symptoms of infections include the willingness to believe improbable stories without ever thinking; the urge and obsession to forward multiple copies of these stories to others including all types of authorities, and a total lack of any desire to take even 2 minutes to either check that such stories are true or to listen to themselves.
A warning about this virus issued sometime ago by the supposed "Institute for the Investigation of Irregular Internet Phenomena, has been widely disseminated on line and by various news stations at some points in times past. If internet users suspect they've been infected, the messages advise, they should "rush to their favourite search engines and look up the item(s) and simply look up the item tempting them to thoughtless credence. In most homes, legends, alleged news stories and, of course, rumours and "tall tales" are and have been widely discussed, laughed at and exposed by the many internet users that still retain at least, a facsimile of coherent minds, some examples: If someone comes to your door saying they are conducting a survey and asks you to take your clothes off, do not do it! This is a scam; they only want to see you naked. Many wish they'd gotten this warning yesterday. You will feel cheap and dirty now...
A new computer virus is spreading throughout the entire internet! It is far more insidious than the virus last week's called the "I've been Abducted by Tiny Aliens", named after a classic guide to family style Jokes, it returns email messages that have over the top adult jokes totally inappropriate to most families scared of God and have numerous grammatical errors... another is White People Are being Shrunk by Coloured Aliens from Inner Space! Emergency emails arriving soon....Please forward this message to everyone on your e-mail list NOW!
A warning about this virus issued sometime ago by the supposed "Institute for the Investigation of Irregular Internet Phenomena, has been widely disseminated on line and by various news stations at some points in times past. If internet users suspect they've been infected, the messages advise, they should "rush to their favourite search engines and look up the item(s) and simply look up the item tempting them to thoughtless credence. In most homes, legends, alleged news stories and, of course, rumours and "tall tales" are and have been widely discussed, laughed at and exposed by the many internet users that still retain at least, a facsimile of coherent minds, some examples: If someone comes to your door saying they are conducting a survey and asks you to take your clothes off, do not do it! This is a scam; they only want to see you naked. Many wish they'd gotten this warning yesterday. You will feel cheap and dirty now...
A new computer virus is spreading throughout the entire internet! It is far more insidious than the virus last week's called the "I've been Abducted by Tiny Aliens", named after a classic guide to family style Jokes, it returns email messages that have over the top adult jokes totally inappropriate to most families scared of God and have numerous grammatical errors... another is White People Are being Shrunk by Coloured Aliens from Inner Space! Emergency emails arriving soon....Please forward this message to everyone on your e-mail list NOW!
Joke of the day - doors
I remember way back when I was a teenager. One time my girlfriend and I broke up.
In an effort to comfort me, my uncle told me; "When one door closes, another will open up."
What a nice guy he was. Terrible cabinet maker, but truly a nice guy.
In an effort to comfort me, my uncle told me; "When one door closes, another will open up."
What a nice guy he was. Terrible cabinet maker, but truly a nice guy.
online today!
Calling all moderators...
Calling all moderators... Calling all moderators... Be on the lookout for 40 bogus profiles.
They are giving out phone numbers and email address, using photos stolen from Twitter and Instagram. They come from non-existent locations like Dallas, New York and New York, Virginia.
Considered annoying by CS'ers and possibly dangerous to the unsuspecting newbies.
end of message.. over (squelch chirp)
They are giving out phone numbers and email address, using photos stolen from Twitter and Instagram. They come from non-existent locations like Dallas, New York and New York, Virginia.
Considered annoying by CS'ers and possibly dangerous to the unsuspecting newbies.
end of message.. over (squelch chirp)
He is BADLY missed by someone
Some bromances are.....'special'.
Perhaps this one ranked above all others.
Satire from The New Yorker;
Perhaps this one ranked above all others.
Satire from The New Yorker;
In response to:
Putin Misses Former Employee
By Andy Borowitz
MOSCOW (The Borowitz Report)—In unusually emotional remarks at the Kremlin, the Russian President, Vladimir Putin, said that he “deeply missed” a former employee.
“I remember one time, in Helsinki, when I told him that I didn’t meddle in the American election, and he obediently repeated what I said,” Putin recalled. “I knew then and there that I had found a very special employee.”
“Then there was the time a reporter asked if I was a killer, and he changed the subject,” he said.
“I thought to myself, If only everyone who worked for me was this good.”
Putin acknowledged that dealing with his employee could sometimes be frustrating, “like when the interpreter would have to translate my instructions into very short and simple words so he could understand them,” but admitted that such inconveniences seemed trivial now.
“None of that outweighs the sheer comfort of knowing that he was always working for me,” Putin said, choking back tears. “I do miss him so.”
Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998.
He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.
Putin Misses Former Employee
By Andy Borowitz
MOSCOW (The Borowitz Report)—In unusually emotional remarks at the Kremlin, the Russian President, Vladimir Putin, said that he “deeply missed” a former employee.
“I remember one time, in Helsinki, when I told him that I didn’t meddle in the American election, and he obediently repeated what I said,” Putin recalled. “I knew then and there that I had found a very special employee.”
“Then there was the time a reporter asked if I was a killer, and he changed the subject,” he said.
“I thought to myself, If only everyone who worked for me was this good.”
Putin acknowledged that dealing with his employee could sometimes be frustrating, “like when the interpreter would have to translate my instructions into very short and simple words so he could understand them,” but admitted that such inconveniences seemed trivial now.
“None of that outweighs the sheer comfort of knowing that he was always working for me,” Putin said, choking back tears. “I do miss him so.”
Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998.
He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.
I don't know if you have seen this funny show. If not, I recommend it.
I loved the show 'Whose Line is it Anyway', because the audience would choose topics and then the comedians would act out a combination of those topics. It was terrific ad lib comedy.
Long before that, there was 'Hollywood Squares'.
It had 9 boxes and the contestants tried to play tic tac toe,
by getting 3 boxes correct in a row. Each box had a Hollywood star,
who would answer a question. First they would give a joke answer
and then would give what they felt was the correct answer.
The contestants would take turns guessing if their real answer was correct or not.
Well most recently, there is a show called 'Funny You Should Ask'.
It has a somewhat similar scenario, but without the tic tac toe aspect.
Comedians and other somewhat famous people first give a joke answer
and then what they think is the right answer and again the contestants alternate guessing whether the answer they gave was correct or not.
It's quite funny. For instance, the episode I just got done with had 6 stars including John Lovitz and Louie Anderson.
Here's 4 of the questions and the joke answer from tonight's show;
#1. True or false, a company recently was making make-up from human corpses.
Joke answer = Yeah, well, maybe it's Maybelline, or maybe it's your late great Aunt Mabel.
#2. Georgia is known as the state of 3 p's, Peaches, Peanuts and ..... ?
Joke answer = Incestual Pregnancies.
#3. True or False, According to Homes & Gardens magazine, the most dangerous room in a home is the bathroom.
Joke Answer = Yes ! Especially after I use it after eating chilli.
#4. What animal has a nickname of 'Whistle Pigs' ?
Joke answer = Construction workers !
There's an initial round of ~ 5 questions each for each contestant and they get $100 for each one they get right. Then, there's a second round where they double that to $200 each for each right answer.
And the winner then get an third championship round.
So, there's lots of opportunity for laughter.
Long before that, there was 'Hollywood Squares'.
It had 9 boxes and the contestants tried to play tic tac toe,
by getting 3 boxes correct in a row. Each box had a Hollywood star,
who would answer a question. First they would give a joke answer
and then would give what they felt was the correct answer.
The contestants would take turns guessing if their real answer was correct or not.
Well most recently, there is a show called 'Funny You Should Ask'.
It has a somewhat similar scenario, but without the tic tac toe aspect.
Comedians and other somewhat famous people first give a joke answer
and then what they think is the right answer and again the contestants alternate guessing whether the answer they gave was correct or not.
It's quite funny. For instance, the episode I just got done with had 6 stars including John Lovitz and Louie Anderson.
Here's 4 of the questions and the joke answer from tonight's show;
#1. True or false, a company recently was making make-up from human corpses.
Joke answer = Yeah, well, maybe it's Maybelline, or maybe it's your late great Aunt Mabel.
#2. Georgia is known as the state of 3 p's, Peaches, Peanuts and ..... ?
Joke answer = Incestual Pregnancies.
#3. True or False, According to Homes & Gardens magazine, the most dangerous room in a home is the bathroom.
Joke Answer = Yes ! Especially after I use it after eating chilli.
#4. What animal has a nickname of 'Whistle Pigs' ?
Joke answer = Construction workers !
There's an initial round of ~ 5 questions each for each contestant and they get $100 for each one they get right. Then, there's a second round where they double that to $200 each for each right answer.
And the winner then get an third championship round.
So, there's lots of opportunity for laughter.
Uh oh !
I hope you have a nice day.... AND that your computer doesn't crash.
It's gorgeous here today, perhaps the best day of the year so far.
It's in the mid-70's, sunny, with a slow & steady breeze.
online today!
Heckler...
Typically, a heckler is a person who harasses and tries to disconcert others with questions or challenges. In a public setting they are often known to shout disparaging comments at a performance or event, or to interrupt set-piece speeches, with the intent of disturbing performers and/or participants.
I first learned about hecklers when I saw comedian Don Rickles doing stand-up comedy. Don used to perform in supper clubs around upstate New York... the Catskills.
If someone from the audience became vocal, he was quick with the one-line comebacks to the point of insulting hecklers literally driving them out of the venue.
I've seen some videos where he egged them on as it was possibly a part of his routine!
In the virtual world things are a lot quieter. People blog and hecklers who are often referred to as trolls go from blog to blog (or forum thread) leaving comments to 'show themselves' with other members of the blogging community.
The psychology of it all... well, I believe something is bothering them in their personal life so they seek enjoyment attempting to disrupt the lives of others. Sometimes, it's a group and sometimes they single out a member or two.
I heard of one heckler who was bounced from a comedy club a few times so he decided to stand out front complaining to the patrons about one comedian "Don't waste your money, this guy tells the same jokes every night!"
Ya think?
I first learned about hecklers when I saw comedian Don Rickles doing stand-up comedy. Don used to perform in supper clubs around upstate New York... the Catskills.
If someone from the audience became vocal, he was quick with the one-line comebacks to the point of insulting hecklers literally driving them out of the venue.
I've seen some videos where he egged them on as it was possibly a part of his routine!
In the virtual world things are a lot quieter. People blog and hecklers who are often referred to as trolls go from blog to blog (or forum thread) leaving comments to 'show themselves' with other members of the blogging community.
The psychology of it all... well, I believe something is bothering them in their personal life so they seek enjoyment attempting to disrupt the lives of others. Sometimes, it's a group and sometimes they single out a member or two.
I heard of one heckler who was bounced from a comedy club a few times so he decided to stand out front complaining to the patrons about one comedian "Don't waste your money, this guy tells the same jokes every night!"
Ya think?
Covid...19.
My dearest and nearest
East or west
Home is the best
Take some more rest
Don't call any guest
Enjoy your home fest
Don't do any out going zest
This is our life saving test
So let us be in our nest
It is an humble request
As corona reaching everest
Stay home stay safe.
Wash hands and face
Take shower and clean clothes...eat
Good food.. And sleep
8hours....all the best
For. All of us....
East or west
Home is the best
Take some more rest
Don't call any guest
Enjoy your home fest
Don't do any out going zest
This is our life saving test
So let us be in our nest
It is an humble request
As corona reaching everest
Stay home stay safe.
Wash hands and face
Take shower and clean clothes...eat
Good food.. And sleep
8hours....all the best
For. All of us....
A Blog is a journal you may enter about your life, your thoughts, interesting experiences, or lessons you have learned. It's your own page on Connecting Singles that you can update on a regular basis, or just whenever you have something to say. You can write about an opinion, impart words of wisdom, or talk about something interesting in your day. Creating a blog is a good way to share something of yourself with Connecting Singles members. Reading blogs is a good way to learn more about members you have met here. Please be sure to read the blog rules before posting.
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