5 Things You Need to Know About Dating a Lawyer

Few fields take more heat than the legal profession. Lawyers are the butts of jokes the world over, with their integrity and trustworthiness being called into question in ways that every comedian has been able to repackage. This is ironic, of course, given that lawyers are among the only professionals required to go through a character evaluation before getting a license to practice. Of the tens of thousands of lawyers in the United States and around the world, there are bound to be a few bad apples and a handful of extraordinary people. You may be able to envision a scenario in which you will need a lawyer, but what about dating one? Before you set your sights on dating a lawyer, there are some things you need to know. Lawyers can be smart, argumentative, and difficult to handle. They can sometimes work long hours. Life with a lawyer isn't all bad, though. Here are five things to keep in mind.

1. They're Workaholics

Lawyers love to work, and even if they don't love it, they're sometimes forced to work. If you're dating a lawyer who does criminal defense, then he might have to take late-night phone calls from the jail or terrified calls from moms who want their kids released. He may also get those pesky phone calls from relatives during holidays. If she's a civil litigator, then she'll likely be working long hours and traveling the country to chase down the next big case. If the person you're dating happens to work in a big law firm, then she'll have billable hour requirements. Many lawyers are expected to bill at least 40 hours per week. In order to bill that number of hours, they'll need to work 10 or 20 more, leading to some very long weeks for your dating partner and you.

The love of long hours is bred into lawyers early in the process. Law school is a meat grinder where people are rewarded for being the first person through the door and the last person to leave at night. The pressure of being a law student turns into the pressure of real-life lawyering when the person gets into practice. Prepare yourself for this. If you have a robust professional life of your own, you'll be better able to manage the difficulty of dating a lawyer.

2. They Love Coffee

Those long nights spent researching case law are much easier when their caffeine is flowing. Lawyers can turn into coffee addicts. Whether they are burning the midnight oil or getting up early to make appearances in court, many lawyers lean on good coffee to get them through the day. Your house may start to smell like beans if you're not careful. Know too that some lawyers will begin to indulge in soft drinks as a way of getting their caffeine fix during the day. It's something about the excitement and adrenaline of legal practice that makes lawyers want to fill their veins with the new blend from Starbucks.

3. They Like to Argue, and They're Good at it

Lawyers are paid to argue, whether it's in spoken form or in their written briefs. They are paid to come up with different angles on things, and being agreeable in the legal field can sometimes get a person fired. Lawyers are taught to argue all the way back in law school, when their professors put them through the Socratic method of teaching. While this works well in the courtroom and in a law firm setting, it can be a challenging thing for those who date lawyers.

To have a good relationship, you need to be able to work through problems. This requires both partners to take on some responsibility and accept fault. Lawyers often like to win, and many have a hard time letting an argument go without scoring that win. If you're going to be in a relationship with a lawyer, you'll need to know how they operate so you can account for this behavior.

4. They View the World through a Legal Lens

If you spent every day working in the legal world, you'd begin to think like a lawyer. Most lawyers end up viewing the world through the lens they have cultivated over many years. When seeing that a person has been murdered, their first thought might be about the legal defense of the suspect rather than the pain of the victim's family. This is just the nature of the beast for some lawyers, and it might not seem normal for those who work outside of the legal field.

If you want a relationship with a lawyer to be successful, you may have to accommodate this little quirk. Think of it as a new way of seeing things that can lend some insight to your own life. Good lawyers can usually be identified because they will act like lawyers.

5. They're Sensitive and Empathetic Because They See the Angles

Lawyers are trained to see all sides of situations. This can make them especially empathetic. They may be able to think about the pain of a crime victim while also thinking about the difficult upbringing of the person who committed the crime. This can be a good thing in a relationship. The lawyer you date may be more caring because of his or her experience in cases. If you can get through the petty arguments, your lawyer partner might turn into the most sensitive and empathetic person you've ever dated.

Dating a lawyer can be fun. Lawyers are smart people who usually have unique ways of viewing the world. They are also people who may make life a little more challenging. They'll want to win. Some may have an obsession with always being right. If you find the right lawyer, you may have a gem on your hands who can lead you to a life of happiness. Just make sure you are prepared for dating a lawyer. They're a special breed that will act differently from the accountants you've been seeing.