Last Viewed Comedy Blogs (1,864)

They Say That

When a woman likes a man, she speaks in a higher than normal voice. That would explain why when women talk to me, they sound like Barry White.

Think Twice,

before asking someone to help with a Photoshop.... More at: https://guff.com/these-people-asked-the-wrong-guy-for-photoshop-help You know, the Fr

What I don't like about been single

I've no-one to pick my bad mood out on, with Anyone in the mood for taking, stick

Shot My First Turkey Today

Scared the shit out of everyone in the frozen food section. It was great.

Deathbed Conversation

Doug Pender lived all his life in the Florida Keys and is on his deathbed and knows the end is near. His nurse, his wife, his daughter and two sons, are with him. He asks for two witnesses to be present and a camcorder be in place to record his last

Biden's Greatest Accomplishments in 2023.

Also, Don't smoke cigars. they are bad for your health and suspected to turn you (men or women) in to a misogynist!

Who are the biggest marxist in the blogs?

I am just curious. Please stand up and be counted for.

Don't know which of these 2 is the biggest drama queen

Donald Trump suggests he might deport Prince Harry if he wins US election The former President says he will take "appropriate action" if the Duke is found to have lied about taking drugs on his US immigration forms. The former President says he

Photo Caption Contest - The Oops Bridge

Sometimes things do won't out according to plan. The following picture, that I saw recorded such a discovery. Have some fun offering some captions for the photo, if you like. My first offering will be; "So, what's the problem guys. Get ba

Hunter Biden is going down...

It's about time this criminal has to face the music. That sweet deal he got for his tax crime and gun possession is going away now that his missing laptop showed up at a yard sale in Lansing, Michigan. Someone bought it for $20 and while downloading

learn by example

Here's the Middle finger. Andrea Jenkyns, a Tory MP, made the rude gesture on Thursday when a crowd booed her as she entered Downing Street to watch UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson deliver his resignation speech. The kids love her to bits.

Persevere

Young preacher Nathan was sitting in a lunch counter eating spaghetti and salad. He opened an envelope he’d just received that morning from his mother. As he opened it a thirty bucks fell out. He thought to himself; ”Thanks, Mom, I sure needed that r

What u expect

Many of us are here to find a partner. We expect to find sooner or later. In order to succeed don't u think we all should put up our best photos. We are all unique in our own ways yes, but look at some of the profile photos you men post.

Inanimate Love

Object sexuality or objectophilia is where humans are attracted to inanimate objects, They often feel love and commitment and believe that objects have souls, intelligence and feelings as well as being able to communicate. Ive blogged about shoppi

I was standing at the bar at the VFW one night minding my own business.....

This FAT ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said, "You're kinda cute. You gotta phone number?" I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?" She said, "Yeah, I got a pen". I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you." Co

MY PHONE!

I lost my phone just yesterday, I'm traumatised and lost, I can't speak in conversation, I just don't know what to do, I don't know whatsapp with my friends, my parents want to talk to me, again, that's twice this month, I can't tweet, I can't f

Heckler...

Typically, a heckler is a person who harasses and tries to disconcert others with questions or challenges. In a public setting they are often known to shout disparaging comments at a performance or event, or to interrupt set-piece speeches, with the

At least two transgender women will compete in the Miss Universe pageant

Marina Machete, who was crowned Miss Portugal last week, and Rikkie Valerie Kolle, who became Miss Netherlands in July, will be among the 90 contestants. c*ck in a frock! This is one of the reasons this world is so messed up. Why cant they orga

What Does It Take To Make You Laugh ?

Humor is very important in our life. A person with a lively sense of humor who can laugh at himself/herself and at just about anything is insightful and healthier in a lot of respect. Humor can free us from our inhibitions…can relieve the anxietie

Abby takes the day off work and decides to go golf

He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears, "Ribbit. 9Iron" Abby looks around and doesn't see anyone. "Ribbit.9Iron." He looks at the frog and decides t

Canadian Humour

This comedy group has been been around for a long time...poking fun at Prime Ministers and other politicians including our friends south of the border...time for some laughs...first video clip... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zabXCwvFK

I just 'figured it'

I have always wondered why girls rub their eyes when they wake up. And now after all these years I finally figured it out and the answer is : Because they have no balls to scratch.. Smile Sourpuss.

True or False

Well this could be true in most cases, but maybe that's why so many men rather run than be laid. They (educated women?) say that men in general are like floor tiles. If you lay them right you can spend the rest of your life walking over them.

Xi a ‘Dictator’

After what seemed a productive meeting between U.S. President Joe Biden and Chinese President Xi Jinping in San Francisco on Wednesday, an offhand remark by Biden could set back the relationship that the two leaders were working to mend. “After to

God's Email

One day God was looking down at earth and saw all of the rascally retirees' behavior that was going on... So He called His angels and sent one to earth for a time. When the angel returned, he told God, ‘Yes, it is bad on earth; 95% of r

The Rooster

"A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster disappeared under the car. A cloud of feathers. Shaken, the man pulled over at the farmhouse, rang the door bell. A farmer appeared. The man,

lol

"7 Stunning Women for Every Man"

Yep. That's the tagline of the ad I saw on my laptop screen after answering an email on here moments ago. Despite the photo of the lovely lass, I said, "Nope. Not for me" instantly. :no: First of all, 7 women would be exhausting.

need some witty answers..

Who are you?

It's a case of up or down low

New timely satire from Borowitz This is subsequent to Dirty Don's very recent ALL UPPER CASE TWEET to Iran. Satire from The Borowitz Report Trump to Discontinue Obama-Era Practice of Using Lowercase Letters By Andy Bor

Biden Arrives At Border To Address His Voters

“The confused migrant crowd was then directed to a welcome station to receive their smartphones, visa gift cards, and mail-in ballots. BROWNSVILLE, TX — Amid record-breaking illegal immigration at the southern border, President Biden arrived in Br

NEWCOMERS ... The White House's new name for the invading illegal invaders.

Expect to pay more taxes to afford the new Majority..... you can't make this up. https://townhall.com/tipsheet/spencerbrown/2024/03/01/the-white-house-tries-out-a-new-term-for-illegal-aliens-and-hoo-boy-n2635922 [URL=https://imgbox.com/IRwg4dJ

What Kind Of Weather Do You Like?

Today, the weather is terrible where I live! It has been snowing and blowing since late last night! Blizzard conditions with major whiteouts! Cannot drive any place because of the whiteouts and drifting snow! It is a "balmy" 12 degrees F o

I'm Not Totally Useless

I can be used as a bad example..........................

Does bill gates still claim that cows emit more pollution than running cars?

Well, here is a proposal for billy to settle once and for all wether his unscientific baloney might be true or not. https://www.instagram.com/reel/C4RQ7IiuhPj/?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet

Ivanka needs a babysitter...

Ivanka is scheduled to appear (by order of the court) Wednesday next week to testify in the New York fraud trial of the Trump organization case. You know, she and Jared have moved to Miami and she's busying raising children. Pretty terrible duty mom

Eye wood bee in treble...

Eye all waves re lye on my speel ling checkered cause eye meek sew Manny miss steaks when tie ping. Read ding sung of duh blogs hair aye thank sung peeps should bee dew wing the sane as me. ----- You may have noticed when speaking into your cellp

Will the next potus please stand up

https:

I Need Some Hugs & Kisses

I think I'm going to get sick...very sick I'm still at work but I feel so tired ( on Monday!) and just had 2 tablets of Advil ( The Advanced Medicine For Pain) and on my 3rd cup of warm tea ( Lipton ) I think I'm being punished...I came

It's FESTIVUS! For The REST OF US!!

YOUTUBE The Story Of Festivus Yep! December 23...FESTIVUS! The most irreverent, sacrilegious, un-commercialized holiday that celebrat

Hot date tonight ?

Be careful of those.....smouldering desires you may get burnt and be fuming later.