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Have A Happy Thursday
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After looking a recent film by the title 45, I was quite perplexed for what its central message cot point could be. The old ageing actors are superb, CHARLOT Rambling just 70 and the magnificent old wooly of the sixties Tom Caurntey approaching his eighties.A couple with no kids somewhere in winter s England deciding to celebrate their 45 years of marriage because at their 40 the husband had a bypass operation and they missed it.

And suddenly the authorities inform the old man that the dead body of his misress when he was 27 and before meeting his wife, was found intact as at the age of death that she was 28 in a glacier in Swizerland after an accident she had 50 years ago with her loverwho survived but her corpse was never found.She was wearing a marriage ring because the young lovers were telling to the hoteliers that they were married to have permission in a double room.The old man in a shoc by the idea to look at the face of his ex mistress exactly as it was 50 years ago decides to go to recognise the dead body as the authorities asked him thinking he was married to her. He goes even to a touristic agency to book a ticket to the Alpes.And suddenly he changes his mind and stays home to celebrate the 45th anniversary of his marriage with local friends in a public salon where he speaks a touching summary of his married life.End of the film but the message was still missing.

And just today I after a week passed I resolved the riddle or the mystery of his decision. By the thought that even in this age somebody has to look in the present and maybe in the future but not in the past that is lost. His 45 years of marriage is of course a past but a past connected directly with his present time. So, permitted nostalgia is this that can be connected to an actual condition and not something completely and definitely lost, otherwise it becomes an eternal mourn.Even ULISSES nostalgising his beloved Ithaka was planning how to recover it .

And my quest is the following: Is it worthy to choose a woman just for the easy things ( pleasures so common in youth) or somebody has to focus on the difficulties and how to face them together with a woman who can resist or tolerate or encouragen raising the morals this having not much to do with pleasures ?

I know its not good to start rumours, but I heard a senior and well-respected member of CS is going to have a baby. Further more, a certain man told me he was thinking of going into rehab. Again. Whats more, they're not being honest about what is in meat pies.

It is much pleasure to prepare foods for our beloved and feel the luxury of holiday time at home. Seeing Moms enjoying the hard work's fruits is more rewarding than many other things

But though i don't dare to look at facebook as that might make me feel sad looking at my friends' families and their chidlren, many neighbours came with their children and all the cutiest things that make me crazy for having kids of my own. oh well, this incident made my holiday half ful lol.

Life seems teasing me when the men i like either do not want children or can not have children. time passes by so fast, hope after hope, disappointment after disappointment but thankfully that new days still come with new hopes.

Anyway, prepared for the worst, ready for the possible and hope for the best

....I wake up in the early hours feeling lonely...its rare but when I do it turns my stomach..this morning is one of those days..

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We talked nearly an hour on phone about cooking and how going to supermarket in the States is to oversea Vietnamese. Some how i m jealous of my buddy lol though feel happy for her. Here is her product

She gave up going to work and stays home as a housewife. Now she has plenty of time playing with our hobby of cooking, especially when her beloved husband loves everything she cooks. If only i were her, i would be so contented too lol. No need to worry about relations at work, no pressure, all is about love and care

Now i have not much free time and motivation to cook. Wish i could have someone to cook for and to see him enjoying my foods with love
Miss those days ...

No short-term plan, nothing special to do these days,except checking the daily ordinary expenses we spent during the past 19 months when Dad with me. And made the whole details fees (outlays and incomes) into a total number in a notebook, waiting my sister come to check up...

The other money of my dad left in a bank is blocked and need to be notarized. Trouble things become...

So just waiting my sister return back from aboard,she was absented during our difficult time even gave her dad a simple call. Now it's the time for her to gain dad's money the half part of hers. Anyway she is 10 years older than me and no kids I can understand that. but still feel for her actions to our dad...


Hope this bad mood not last for a long . Spring is here and life must go on. Isn't it?

...on the 31st Mrch I sent my son off to the Uk for a 2 week break to see his mates, it was the first time he has flown on his own so old dad was a bit worried.

Louis has always been a shy and not very confident lad, but he managed to get to the UK fine, his mate picked him up and not heard from him really.

Today on Facebook he posted a photo..its the first time I've seen him smile in a photo as normally he hates having his photo taken.. He booked a train ticket to London and found his way via a tube to meet a Girl he met last time he was in the UK.

Seems I've lost my son as he's all grown up and don't need his dad to take him places anymore...been sat here crying my eyes out..times flies.

...flew back to he UK on Thursday to see his friends for 2 weeks..and a new GF he met last time we were back.

So I sent him off on his way, worried he will lose his wallet..passport you name it. Its the first time he's flown anywhere on his own. So was worried sick..he landed in the UK at 6:30 am and his mate, a farmer picked him up in his landcover.

So all was good, I have now fumigated his bedroom as it stunk..Now on Thursday night I went out with my GF and her mate Lyn. They both came back to the house and her friend stayed in Louis's room.

In the morning I asked if Lyn slept well, she said not really, there was a woman who slept next to me..WTF..what did she look like...old..blonde hair..Immediatley I thought of my mum..so I showed her a photo..yes thats her...

What should I take from this ?