I totally disagree--if you are taken by someone you trust, I may blame myself maybe 10% for putting the trust there to begin with, but I blame the person who wronged me 90% for being a scumbag. Tikiguy, if you were mugged at night near a bad neighborhood, would you tell the cops "hey, let the mugger go. It was my fault for being here in the 1st place"?
Maybe Mr Sensative is putting on the BS because the woman is hot---like you said, "how do I act on a 1st date"...depends on how hot she is. I think BS in a forum is harmless, but BS on a 1st date playing someone to get some--that could really hurt someone. Do you use total candor on a 1st date Tikiguy, even if she is hot? I am not trying to pick on you, just trying to get a sense of human nature.
To be honest, I have never had the courage to ask out a beautiful woman. BUT, I have been very lucky to have been asked out by an incredibly beautiful woman and I accepted. I did feel intimidated in our relationship somewhat, but we had to split because she moved and we left on great terms. I think I would have gotten over the intimidation over time though.
So if you dated a woman for a month, and were falling in love with her. And then you asked her how many men has she been with. She says 49 and she is 28 years old. All of your feelings for her would just disappear? How about if she is trying to become less promiscuous and you were the one she is counting on to help. You are falling for her, and she for you. Well I guess by your standards, she isn't worth it because of one issue and you would just dump her. I say, who cares how many before---you are the one NOW! Just get tested and let the past go.
Come on guys...alot of men are intimidated by beautiful women...me included. How many guys are afraid to approach a woman because of her looks? We all have had that moment of truth. We think the beautiful girl will automatically reject us because of one inadequate reason or another. And I hear alot of pretty women complain men won't ask them out, but her friends get dates. Just my opinion.
Sorry sweetandshy, but I was attacked by him today unprovoked. He flirted with Sheila and I said to Sheila that he will have to fly to Myrtle Beach instead of Tennessee to meet you. Sheila wants to move to Myrtle Beach. Then he called me a stalker! I lost my last girlfriend because of a stalker, so I got mad. BUT I held back. I said that he had a big ego but that was it. I gave him advice not to be so desparate and he will find someone and then I wished him good luck. Then he called me an old man who dates 90 year old women and I should take my dates to the zoo. I did not respond to his childish post and I left. So Sweetandshy, he was guilty more than anyone of being antagonistic. I held my tongue and even gave him encouragement, but he attacked me twice. So I hope you won't try to be so protective of him in the future. he was his own worse enemy. I don't know what happened afterward to get himself thrown out, but he is no Mr innocent!
mbcasey Forum Posts (16,449)
RE: Why isn't Candor Appreciated?
I totally disagree--if you are taken by someone you trust, I may blame myself maybe 10% for putting the trust there to begin with, but I blame the person who wronged me 90% for being a scumbag. Tikiguy, if you were mugged at night near a bad neighborhood, would you tell the cops "hey, let the mugger go. It was my fault for being here in the 1st place"?