BnaturAl Forum Posts (6,811)

How Important Is It ....?

daughters, waiting on the world to change ....


too bad he is relatively unknown and under appreciated. People who are entrenched in the music world though are well aware of his talent. I have seen more musicians at his concerts than Celine Dion gets and thats saying something when your peers want to see you.

How Important Is It ....?

I should note that thread isn't because of anyone here, it is a general queery I have had for some time in my life, in general experience.

How Important Is It ....?

true enough. or dont say it until or unless you do mean it.

How Important Is It ....?

I agree with you M ... I however don't feel manipulated. Perhaps I have this ability to attach anothers behavior as theirs rather than create a personal implication. They may indeed be premeditating manipulation, I just think a person like that is "being what they are by repetition of their past experience. I give leeway and may note their behavior is unacceptable and give them a chance to correct itm, but I am often quite clear about the consequences of repeating the behavior again.

people deserve a chance to change, just not 100 chances...

How Important Is It ....?

agreed!


just an aside.... that saying ought to be tempered somewhat and most often. I acknowledge that emotions sometimes get the better of us, but if people spend more time identifying the emotion, then identifying its appearance within us,first, then the "saying" part becomes more meaningful, not only for us, but for the person who "wants" to hear.

How Important Is It ....?

great song ... Mayer is one of a kind, musically, lyrically and intellectuallly

How Important Is It ....?

when some folks can't deal with the truth or information, they have a tendency to try and attack some other part of the issue, but most often the speaker, messenger, or they sidetrack and create some other issue. Its genarally an abusive personality that does this, an attempt to distract you from the issue because they cant handle the truth ot the information.

Its mostly people who issue a lot of threats and empty promises, that tend to think others are doing the same as well.

How Important Is It ....?

there is defintely an "avoidance" factor in operation here

How Important Is It ....?

in this day and age with land lines, cell phones, internet the ability to communicate is better than ever and it only takes a couple minutes to pick up and say .. I'm behind, or late but still on my way, or can't make it now...etc...

How Important Is It ....?

the possibility for misunderstanding exists in RL as well as here. I know there no intonations here yada yada, but generally speaking people are sometimes want to misinterpret or colour anothers words in their own emotional present. Not much you can do about it unless they will communicate or one asks for clarification. For me i dont find much difference in RL and VR, misunderstand and misinterpretation are common amongst humans, communication apparently isn't as valued.

RE: Experiences

the daydreams? ya, all day everyday.and i dont even have a relationship now..

I have actually done a LD relationship. Not easy since relationships require (to me) some consistent RL interaction, which inclines one (well, me again) in an LDR to think there is a need to move earlier than is required than when we both live in the same city or vacinity.

Planning is important as Trace notes, because the general wisdom of moving into the city where that person is, with consideration for financial implications, generally results in moving in together, which can be, not always mind you, a risky step, pushing the limits of a 'normal' relationship discovery period, where one normally goes home to their own place more often. LD'Rs negate that ability, the sense of 'my place' and the ability to be alone once in a while to digest what is going on, or to just ease into a relationship rather than go through the immediate change.

For some that may be inconsequential I suppose and I am a proponent of finding out as soon as possible if things will work; but those first days, and months, are somewhat more pressured when normal interaction is "sped up" by the necessity of moving in together.

It works for some. I am just saying I think its more difficult, unless you're prepared for getting your feet real wet all at once and having no where to go and dry them off as normal, in the vacinity, relationships permit.

On the other hand some folks need and want to be in that situation, want to be drowned in the other person, warts and all, so ...for me, I guess it is a personal decision in all ways.

All relationships have pitfalls and challenges.

How Important Is It ....?

COuld be Kev ... I see some noteworthy points there. I observe folks also who have so many friends, so many committments, its as if they spread themselves out so much so as to avoid being lonely perhaps. The numbers of friends means if one is angry with them, they can just go to someone else, ignoring you and the issues of their inability to committ. just guessing though ...

I mean I guess it's possible for some there is some rather innocent innateness about the behavior...no ill will intended, just some auto life mechanism that makes them who they are.

How Important Is It ....?

that old saying "there's two people you can always count on for guaranteed truth, drunks and children"

How Important Is It ....?

I agree dru ...

I am curious though as to the nature of folks who don't have this "tude" about life.

How Important Is It ....?

it would be better to get driven to nuts




ahhhhh .... the nut taxi ..

How Important Is It ....?

I think so too T ... I think by and large people "know" you by your follow through, no matter how small the matter is.

There is a difference between joking around as well and I see how sometimes that can get misconstrued as to one's seriousness, but most times one can see, sense obvious playfulness rather than serious promise or threat. Or is that the difference? Are some people less inclined to see or speak in terms of serious?

How Important Is It ....?

Do you mean that Jeff?


Regularly doing it is what I was saying, as apposed to occasional happenstance.


Some folks seem to be OK with it, their intent doesn't seem to be to annoy or frustrate, they just seem to have a fly by the seat of their pants attitude, saying what's needed in the moment. Perhaps they do it so much, that recall of their seeming commitment becomes a blurr?

My own personal observations is that there are more people who are like this to some degree than people who's word is their bond (save life's interference)

I am just curious and I know people will sometimes change their minds, but consistently without notifiying the other that they have done so.

Is it that life doesn't matter, other people don't matter, a control mechanism ..... other?

How Important Is It ....?

Well Al ....it's more important to not say nothing at all

RE: Confused!!

righteo ... what color are my shower walls?

How Important Is It ....?

To say what you mean and mean what you say?


___________

This is one thing that confuses me sometimes. I don't mean in an absolute sense. There are times when life just makes it difficult for people to follow through; however, I am talking about people who very rarely follow through on what they say, often making idle threats and or meaningless promises ..

AND people who don't care or shrug off your own words as if they mean nothing, seeing them as idle threats, when indeed you mean you say.

I have been trying to understand this behavior for some time now, it appears to have some laissez faire about life that baffles me when (from my point of view) relationships of all types require something based in truth and reasonable expectation.

Right, wrong, in between?

RE: Confused!!

thats what I love about you, I can tell when you're naked






monkey

RE: Confused!!

ok, so I'm going in the shower now .... shmearin time ! don't even think about me in there .... nekkid ...

RE: Pilots

agreed, let's do another lap, then a nose dive

RE: Confused!!

alright thats enough time. you ...... you .... I know, you're in the shower, shmearin soap all your body, drizzling water over yourself squeezed out of the loofa, smiling and gettin me .....

RE: Pilots

mind the turbulence

RE: I Woke Up This Morning

I woked up!




thanks for the near dedication trace ....



you seem to be quite inspired of late ...

RE: Experiences

nekkid video calls!

and several daydreaam sequences involving pictures

RE: HELLO MY NAME IS......

a fav movie of mine

RE: HELLO MY NAME IS......

don't call me baby either!


whats that song "you call everybody darlin" ... ick...

RE: Confused!!

you still love me though, right?





if you don't respond, I'm going to think the worst...