I have to point out that I am not suggesting that a woman who is pregnant should look for a man, I am stating that there is nothing wrong with falling in love when pregnant.
We are very quick to judge men, when we want a new relationship, in that they must love our children because they love us.
The OP has asked a great question and some men would not do it, which is understandable, my point is that people are saying that the OP s friend is being selfish because she is looking.
I never wanted men in my children's lives, but I had to live with my ex husband falling in love and bringing a mother figure into my children's lives.
I had no choice in that matter, while I battled with my own demons and trying to be reasonable about the whole affair, much to my own personal cost, emotionally.
Feelings are feelings, if a pregnant woman has feelings, is it bad because she is pregnant?
I would much rather a man come along and want that child to raise as his own, rather than a pregnant mum shut herself away and struggle alone...
A pregnant woman cannot shut her feelings off, just like we cannot who are not pregnant.
But I am talking on two people who fall in love...
I am going to become unpopular here, but the being pregnant is the easy part.
It is when those children are staring you in the face that it becomes harder.
I am not disagreeing with your thoughts, but are you suggesting that if a pregnant mother and a guy who was not the father of the child, fall in love, that the mother should push that aside?
What if a man falls in love with a pregnant woman is what I am asking? Should the pregnant mother be shunned because she fell in love?
Please understand I am not saying this lady should be out there seeking dates and not concentrating on her pending birth and the rearing of a child.
I am stating that why should being pregnant handicap a person in dating?
We have many threads here about single parents dating, all of whom are encouraged to date, why should a pregnant woman not have the ability to find love?
As you described in your post, it can happen. There are many men out there who have taken children on that are not biologically theirs.
I was a single mother of two biological children, one who I have adopted and raised for nine years, would that have prevented the man who did fall in love with me from falling in love with me had I been pregnant with somebody else's child?
I did not find it, because I never looked for it. It was never hiding from me, but I needed time away and a self appointed exile was worth it, to find myself, that was what was lost, not love.
People don't find love, we live and bleed it, it does not happen and we then have it.
I enjoyed my time alone, being alone. It was a healing process for me, made me look at myself. I flew a one man plane and I realised the mistakes I made, to err is human. Forgiveness is huge.
I have never been embarrassed to state my husband left me for another woman, because I am through the pain. He is a good man and was tortured in his own right. We have an affinity because of our children and we laugh about our days together as man and wife, he is happy and he fell in love with the right woman for him and she has become a good friend. She is a great stepmother to my children who also adore her. There is room for us all and we really are the nuclear family. I was the one who babysat their child so that they could go out together. Their little boy is my children's brother.
Bitterness and anger serves no person. I was lost in that pit for many years. Now I am out of it.
Happy, have a great life, a superb guy by my side, healthy, well balanced children who have the benefit of both their parents.
Sommerauer71 Forum Posts (12,414)
RE: Dating and pregnant
Ooooh Tina!You jammy cow.
Dio???? The man I fell in love with from reading his journal.