I really think you've done all you can...I know if i had my "cardigan" peeled off of my frail bony withered shoulders...and helped to the commode...i would be "hot" and rearing to go myself..
With the exception of Cris..the rest of us "politely" tried to say the very same thing that Kat said...and Kat i thought was being just as "sensitive" to her as we were, but still trying to be honest with her answer...but for some reason she took off on Kat...
I still throw my lot in with the way Kat is seeing it...you know very well Kris..that i have had to take a "back seat" in the interest of making sure the "new" woman in my "ex's" life feel she was his number one priority...and not me...
You know FindMe..Kat has always been one of the more "sensitive, compassionate" women on this site...always having an encouraging word for people and a shoulder to cry on if you need one...to any and everyone... She had a point of view, expressed it...and even went so far as to apologize to you for having an opinion...I find your response to her beneath you...
No Kat you didn't...(you can see my reply to that same thread about this same thing)
Don't upset yourself...as i said there...we are "neutral parties" looking at it from an outsiders point of view...I happen to agree with the way you saw it...and if she would put aside her anger for a moment and reread her original post...she would see what we saw too..she identified herself more as her "ex's" partner with this woman being the "other woman"...or at least that is what i saw..
No harm done...she asked a question on a public forum...and got responses...some she will like..some she won't...we've all "been there"...
If you both have decided to go your own way..and not "make back" then you need to leave him and his new g/f alone to sort out their issues...YOU cannot be there for him now...that is her place not yours any longer...(I would have said it was possible, but the fact that you both still have "feelings" for each other say this is not going to work) If she is "insecure" that is for him to worry about...not you..put yourself in her place...does she or does she not have reason to feel these "insecurities" with regards to you and your "ex"
You said you divorced for all the wrong reasons..it leads me to believe you did not really put an end to that marriage...you just followed through with what you had started...
I would hope to be "civil" to the new woman in my "ex's" life..she will be part of my childrens life...and she is with a man that I once loved and cared for...I want him to be happy too...but my days for making him happy is over...and if she feels that i am in the way somehow...I would back off (with the exception of things pertaining to my children)...because that smacks of having your cake and eating it too... And as long as you show some "encouragement" to your "ex" (by saying you still have feelings) he will never fully move on and he is doing that girl and injustice...
That i should have been so lucky for him to have interpreted those kisses to mean I wanted to be his...but then he couldn't have known...I don't kiss any and everyone...
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RE: Now here we go ,the advice theard
Hey Kathy...i was working...but i've kind of "sworn off" pie for the time being...so if you don't mind i think i'll just pass okay..