Happygolucky4u Poetry (159)

I know you loved him. I loved him too.
He was my daddy before he had you.
He left me all alone and I went on.
And soon memory of him was gone.
At one time I made him up.
In my mind to be what I wanted him to be.
Just to fill the empty spot,
That seemed to live within me.
I grew up. And he came around.
Like a fleeting ghost running thru a ghost town.
One moment he was here the next gone.
I guess he went back to you, back to his home.
Years went by and life went on.
Like a whirl wind that moves so fast it sings a song.
The hospital said got your father here.
I brought him home back to me.
No one come they just let him be.
We had the time to mend our hearts.
To find the love we shared from the start.
You ask me if I resented you.
The times you had with him.
I wondered where you were.
When it all came to an end.
As you write to me of your love my friend.
I must sadly tell you there is nothing of his that is mine.
Tho he left it all to me for my time.
I could never take a penny for being there.
I gave it all to my sister.
Aint life unfair.

The time has come. I feel it as it looms outside my door.
It has my whole body standing at attention with the feeling of dread.
And I know I must face this monster once more.
I walk towards the door, with the stroll of the living dead.
I walk out into the sun lit day.
So beautiful the animals think it is time to play.
Still the heavy feeling in the pit of my soul remains.
For to get the upper hand will be hard to gain.
But I proceed. For I know what awaits me.
And yes there it is. Where I knew it would be.
All hope is all but gone.
To battle this all alone.
OK here goes. I can do this.
As the old lawn mower cranks with a hiss.

I feel the wind as it gently touches my face

I look out past the emerald green

Into the horizon of nothingness

The smell of the salt air

I bask in the familiars of this place

Visions of me playing as a child

Without a care

Of times I ran by the shore

I am as much a part of this as the sand

I run no more

For I am free

Like the sea

They say that time heals all wounds. But that cannot be.
Time does not seem to be healing the pain in me.
The hurt just seems to go on.
Day after day. I feel so all alone.
Since you have gone away.
Not a breath I take that you are not there.
If only in my thoughts.
If really there is a God. Why does he not care?
To leave one of us behind and take the other.
How can that be fair?
So I must go on. To face another day.
Waiting for this pain to slowly fade away.
I never dreamed of a future without you by my side.
Nor have I ever thought I would have to live a lie.
To smile and act as if today is just a day.
To make others feel that healing is on its way.
You asked me to take your hand.
To walk with you thru life.
To be your love, to be your wife.
You said to follow you. That you would lead the way.
We laughed and we played.
Thru life's ups and downs.
Now there is just me.
And your not around.
What am I to do.
I never really knew.
How much my life depended on loving you.

You bought sadness to my heart I should have known right from the start.
To let you have so much of me. What did I expect to be?
Oceans never seemed so wide. As when I want you by my side.
I would like to take your hand. And show you a much happier land.
One is such a lonely thought. When I can't have the love I sought.
Don't you hear my heart as it cries. Please don't let this love die.
You might think I am playing. But listen close to what I am saying.
It's not game to me. With you I wished I could be.
Fear is what I feel is the knife. That will stop loves life.
To take a chance on what may be. To take a chance on you and me.
If you feel what I feel. Write the words and let me see.
But until, I will wait. Make a sign you want a you and me.
Please just don't let it come to late.
For life is such a beautiful flower.
Not a lemon that is bitter and sour.
So let me have the chance.
To show you love and romance.

We walked the trail as we had many days.
Litter strewn and an old pop bottle for scenery.
You lead the way. I follow. All so excited.
Soon we will reach our destination. I could find it on my own.
But you want let me. I could go with my eyes closed.
I can hardly contain my anticipation.
We are nearing our destination.
I can see it in the distance.
We have reached the clearing.
Not much longer and we will be there.
I awaken from my thoughts.
Where once were almost a hundred homes.
All are now long gone.
Just like the store my grandpa use to walk me too.
Now it is replaced with other structures. As if the homes
and time never existed. Removed.
But not from my thoughts my mind.
A little girl with her grandpa.
A time that was so kind.

I am watching you. Your every move.
What are you going to do?
You have entered at your own risk.
Uninvited, but here just the same.
Do not disturb anything.
If so you may change the game.
You might not like what you see.
You might not understand.
It does not matter to me.
My agenda has no time for such.
I have to move on.
Before I lose touch.
No time for sleep.
No time for rest.
This is for real not a test.
The answer is here.
The meaning is now clear.

Hands that have held many babies
Hands that have made many meals
Hands that have closed in prayer
Hands that have did the chores
Hands that have held me.
Love that was always there
Guiding me thru life's journey
Never having to wonder
Always knowing you cared
Eyes so full of love
Reflecting from the heart
Even as you get ready to go
With your wisdom you part
Not just with words
With the way you lived
Were the best lessons you ever gave
Now I look and here you lay
Resting in your grave
But even tho you are gone
I keep you here in my heart
Loving you from the start
So mother to mother I hope I turn out to be
Half the woman you were
That would be good enough for me.

In the quiet of the land. Rose a storm of mass destruction.
No bombs or help by man kind. Just natures hand.
No one knew how big it was to be.
Or how much hurt and pain they would see.
No one had a chance to run.
Before the storm come and went.
And land looked so undone.
We'll start over some will say.
Then others will choose not to stay.
Some will cry for things they loss.
And somes pain will be to high a cost.
In the quiet of the new after time.
Lives will begin anew.
What else can one do?

I tiptoed as quietly as I could. I did not want to be noticed.
The air seemed heavy and the sky darkened the land.
I knew if I was heard there would be trouble.
So I pulled the cloth around my head making a hood.
And moved slowly even though I wanted to run on the double.
I checked for movement from the shadowy thing waiting to pounce on me.
My heart beat seemed to echo off the walls. I was so scared I could hardly see.
From the pounding in my head. So ever so slowly I proceeded where I would not fall.
And then there it was. Standing tall. I wanted to run and hide.
But why? I had done no wrong.
Why are you after me I screamed? Wishing this were just a dream.
There was no answer. Just the feeling of impending doom. For once again the monster "Accusation" had entered the room.

There will be times when you are down
There will be times when you don't want to go on.
There will be times when you've lost your ground
There will be times when you feel all alone.
There will be times when you want to cry
Lay down and just wonder why.
But know that I am a thought away
Pick up the phone I will come to you any day
Cross the mountains and the sea
Nothing could stop little ol' me.
I will help you find your way
All you have to is say.
And I will help you to face your day.
There is no problem that is to great.
That we can't fix with a little fishing bait.
Grab a pole and I will grab the gear.
Don't forget the case of beer.
Let your troubles stay behind.
And we will use this time
And find. Another way to look at things.
And what your life can bring.

Hold me close and say good bye
Don't worry if you see me cry
Sometimes letting go is hard.
But I will get by.

days have gone
and nights have passed
Feeling so alone
cause our love still last

An empty shell
where love once lived
A life that once had so much to give
So sad it is when love does fail.
All I can say is "Oh well"