Solving a dispute like adults.

With me living with 8 other people, each living their own lives with vastly different ways of doing things or different traits, eventually there'll be some form of disagreement or something will annoy someone else. I have lived here for about 3 years, and usually it's been on the small side of things. Not turning off the light in the kitchen when people are done, over-using the washing machine, having small shindigs at 3 am on a weekday and not cleaning up after themselves in the kitchen.

Then there's more.. Severe.. Things that people can do, that impacts the other persons life and body. I have been guilty of two of those things. 1: Being loud with my singing, and 2: my snoring. The person in the room next to mine is someone who is suffering from Hyperacusis. That type of condition is a type of reduced tolerance to sound, making it extremely uncomfortable when someone is singing too loud or snoring too loud.

I didn't think my snoring was an issue until last Saturday morning at about 5:50 am. I woke up to a sound that can only be described as someone using a hammer on the wall at full speed. It continued for about 10 minutes or so, and then it died down. I thought it was me dreaming something, or imagining things, so I asked one of my other housemates if he had heard anything. He heard it as well, so it wasn't my imagination. It was only when I met the guy in the room next to me, that I got an explanation for it.

Apparently, my snoring has kept him awake. To the point where he had to be put on sick-leave from his studies, and has decided to move out when he can. Now, me being someone who cares about others, apologized to him and told him, that it wasn't my intention to cause any inconvenience. When we started the conversation, he was pretty aggressive towards me, almost raging at me for keeping him awake at night. I guess my tone of voice calmed him down, because ten minutes later, we were talking like adults, and not hurling abuse at each other. It was quite nice, because it gave me an opportunity to diffuse what could easily have ended with throwing hands.

I am happy it didn't get to that. I am not a violent person, and I am very afraid of any sort of conflict. We both apologized to each other. Me, for keeping him awake at night, and him for the knocking on the wall at 5:50 am on a Saturday morning.

I have decided to look for somewhere else to live, though. I found a place in Copenhagen with people who are between the ages of 39 and 55. They look like a bunch of nice people, so if I am getting that available room, I am sure that I will be happy there.

As for my snoring - well, I am looking into that. I have found a few products I would like to try out. so hopefully they will help me with my snoring. I ordered them today, and they will arrive in a few days. I will test them out and see if they help my snoring, and my general sleep pattern, which is not good. I might order some more products, so my snoring can be eliminated, or reduced by 95%.

So yes - solving a dispute like adults CAN be achieved, if you just remain calm, keep a calm tone of voice and admit your mistakes, if you have made any. That's also how you can achieve a happy personal life. Remain calm, don't raise your voice and acknowledge any mistakes you might have made. Pro tip!