Being Prepared for It

Do you think being prepared for death of a dear one is easier than it happening unexpectedly? Maybe
In my experience life blindsided me in my youth 3 times from late teens to early twenties with the sudden death of my 3.5 month old son, a 29 yr. old husband and the murder of my biological mom when she was 39 yrs. (all within a 3 yr. period) Not getting into the details of the emotional. It’s as harsh as it gets but you eventually keep moving forward.

In my experience I’ve also learned that waiting on someone to die is the longest wait to endure. My Dad has had a very rewarding long life at 93 or 96, can’t remember now he is one of the living Dead. Will his eventual death hurt as the ones that blindsided me when I was younger? My guess is it won’t be as agonizing. This watching him die also lets me watch how much Mom and him still love each other. Yesterday was their 66th anniversary – WOW huh. It’s a long time to love.

I love “the Love” my folks have even though they are each other’s third marriage. I only get to experience that kind of love with a dog and it’s a wonderful love. My little dog Bella has been by my side 24/7 for 16 yrs. (she made it to 18 yrs. Old). I watched the end coming which is hard enough seeing them lose their abilities. I’ve wished many times at the end of my pets’ life they would go in their sleep but always dealt the card to make the decision when their life quality is gone.

It was a harsh goodbye. Every time I leave the house I try to grab her and in an instant the finality of the reality flashes. Heart hurts like hell but the rest of me is actually great. My mind is in constant thought of the gazillion wonderful memories to be thankful for. The pain of the loss is SO WORTH all the years of LOVE.
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Comments (7)

I felt so sad for you when reading your blog hug

Me i am well prepared, bond bought and have changed it when first making to pure cremation. My sons at either side of country must split my ashes and drop them in the sea grin i can move around as much as i did in life.

Boxes labeled for both boys which i would like them to have as memories, the rest they can do as the please. Charity shop would be good.

That be that it is hard enough as you say for family left behind without having to go through all of that. teddybear

Take care hug
Fay, sorry to hear about your loss. As I started to read your blog, I though it was for your dad. He's hanging in and that is amazing.

I've been through the loss of a pet who out lived the norm expectancy of a German Shepard. I neglected to tell the new owner of the house I sold she's buried in the back yard near the utility easement!
I am so sorry for your loss of Bella. I am typing with tears rolling down my cheeks.

I have never lost anyone close to me suddenly...and do not want to. I had time to say what I needed to say...

My best friend (Maltese) passed away a few years ago....she was so loving..and I too, took her most places with me.

She too, is buried in my back yard in the house that I sold.

I is worth the loss...
I admire you for having courage to write about the toughest times of your life. No self sabotage. You go girl! God have a special mission for you. Guide all those people who are hurting and do not know how to manage emotional pain. Light worker or life coach?Thanks. heart wings
Unfayzed ~ I am so so sorry to hear of the horrific hurdles you endured. to lose a toddler is so terribly sad and how you got through the rest is beyond me. You had the grit to keep going but you have been through so much grief and you went through it.
I know back then there was not the Counselling for the various grief you went through but you got through.
I am crying here as I feel some people get hit in life so hard.
Bravo , you are still here and thank you for sharing such an intimate and sad part of your life.
I'm sorry about that my best friend was murdered at 30. 19 stabs wounds going toe to toe with a knife-wielding martial arts expert who had been attacking a young girl. It's been nearly 6 years now since that night and i'm not sure that anything could have prepared me for it.
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Tampa, Florida, USA

I like being different, hate describing myself. I have many life long friends and come from a large family. Will not consider a long distance relationship. [read more]

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created Aug 2
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