TRUST
One of the strongest pillars that account to the foundation of a good and sound relationship is through this very volatile yet complex and at the same time look so simple emotion given to us, man. T R U S T. With or without it can either break or make a relationship. Life is so complicated and somehow it doesn't look like it gets any easier, with all the negative feelings we have. However, some may or may not agree with me, that Trust actually is a result of some logic and reason applied before its execution.This time, we will cover an area that doesn't only cover lover's realms but it can be to a friend, to a parent, to a fellow employee, to a supervisor or simply to the government.
TRUST. How does it affect our bearings towards the people that are important to us and even to those that are of less significance. And in general, the world for that matter?
Should we give our trust to someone or should we make them earn it? In example, if a person tells you something, would you give the benefit of the doubt that what he is telling or saying is true? This is about being close to that person as he or she will significantly spend most of the time with you.
Or should you assume that theory, where TRUST IS NOT GIVEN RATHER IT IS EARNED. Stemming from the experience, that, everybody is a liar. Therefore, no matter what that person is telling you, until you prove it to be true, you wouldn't give any credit to his words or arguments.
In case of a lover, would you be leery at first and distance yourself until you can feel comfortable that he is telling the truth? Therefore, TIME is always at your side and don't just jump fast to any commitment, rather take your time to know and study how compatible can you be to this person?
Thank you all for your participation..
SR
Comments (53)
First of all, a loss of trust is what broke up my previous relationship of 13 years. It is not fair for you or your partner if there is a lack of trust in a relationship.
Something interesting I found out about trust. It was in my inter-communications college class. The instructor was sharing a story he personally experienced when his flight was canceled out in Denver. While waiting for his flight, he decided to go to the airport bar. He sat down next to a gentleman, who he did not know and was also waiting for his flight to resume. The professor told the class that they got into an unusually deep conversation. The gentleman he sat next to shared some very personal things about himself.
Also from my personal experiences, I have met complete strangers that have shared some deep personal things.
What I found amazing is that these people trusted my professor and myself to open up about themselves. They experiences were shared with us when the people we were talking to knew they would never see us again.
It seems as trust can be given in situations where the person giving the trust knows that the other person will never see them again and not even know who they are. What are your thoughts on that?
In addition, people tend to have affairs when they are out of town on their own.....so I hear.
Another great blog.
I agree that trust is important. Without it no relationship can survive. How that trust is earned will be different for every relationship. I think that most of us here of CS would adhere to the Trust must be earned view, if only because of our past relationships.
Thanks for the thought provoking blog.
and still you must have your a.. covered, for the unexpected,
otherwise it can be fatal.
I do believe that the same reason why we can't just jump into gray area because it does pose the biggest and worse result. But yes when it is lost. It is gone
Thanks Johnny
SR
Thanks Johnny
Trust does stem from the truth as you know it. If one of you
is not telling the truth, how can you trust them?
Thanks
Thanks
in my opinion, trust is not only about tell us lie or truth, trust someone mean we put them as reliable person.
have a nice week end dear
I think after reading and re reading what the questions are, I have come to the conclusion, that may be you have confused the meanings of Trust and believing. You go on to say
Should we give our trust to someone or should we make them earn it? In example, if a person tells you something,
“would you give the benefit of the doubt that what he is telling or saying is true”?
This is about being close to that person as he or she will significantly spend most of the time with you.
This is simply a choice as whether we choose to believe this person and nothing to do with trust.
However, if you asked “if I could trust someone I work with to tell me a truthful story” that would be entirely different to your original question.
You then go on stating that “TRUST IS NOT GIVEN RATHER IT IS EARNED” and using examples again of questions that ask us if we would trust, rather than ask if we would believe.
You also state “everybody is a liar” and “until you prove it to be true”. These statements have nothing to with trust, just whether we choose to believe.
Trust is something that is given a person as a mark of respect.
When that respect is destroyed, so is the Trust. Surely you wouldn’t trust someone you didn’t respect, whether they were telling the truth or not?
I believe what a lot of people tell me, but I don’t trust a lot of people that tell me things.
This sentence covers two different lots of people.Put another way.
i believe what some people tell me, but i dont respect everyone who tells me things
If people want my trust, they first must have my respect, therefore is it not best to say
“RESPECT IS NOT GIVEN, RATHER IT IS EARNED”.
Just a thought.
For me trust is given differently in every relationship, but I do believe that I start our very hesitant with the belief she has to earn it but I tend to be a very trusting but cautious person os it is given easily.
thank yo so much
SR
Thanks
SR
When trust goes out the window respect follows with it. And then nothing remains. For those are the pillars that everything is built upon.
SR
they play it like a "Fiddle"!!
Robert
Thanks SR
Do i believe in God?
Maybe
i dont believe all the writings of the bible, they are very contradictory.
So judging by your comments i should not believe in GOD then.
BUT
Do i trust that there is a GOD, again not sure,
Too many religions say too many things, which is true.
As for you question,
I am holding some rope, so yes i believe i am, do i trust the rope to allow me to climb up or down,
Dont know.
Your initial QUESTION is about Believing not TRUST.
and the fact that you ask why do we need a court to find someone guilty or not is because we do not believe we can find out the truth on our own.
Now let me ask you this.
Do all Liers Kill?
Do all Killers Lie?
who do we believe?
if a Lier said he Killed a man, do we believe him?
If a Killer says he killed a man, Do we believe him?
neither question has anything to do with TRUST.
As i have already responded to your trust issue, which you have overlooked.
TRUST IS GIVEN WHEN ONE RESPECTS ANOTHER, THEREFORE IT IS RESPECT THAT HAS TO EARNED TO RECEIVE TRUST.
please go back yourself and read.
thank you.
thanks again.
SR
thanks again Cat.
SR
Easy does it, right?
thanks..
SR
Government sneeks its hand into your pocket using your trust as a shield so do many other people around manipulating your trust as a deadly weapon against yourself, the bigger it grows the more destructive it comes.
In my oppinion, TRUST shouldnt be something rewarding which you give to others based on your own subjective oppinion, formed within a time frame chosen by yourself, and depending on priority of circumstances also chosen by yourself only. TRUST commonly formed in that way means nothing, just your temporary feelings towards one person or another.
I honestly dont know much about another TRUST, which my parents trust me with or my friends, i tend to belive that is a kind of a very high level feeling which I do respect like a kind of religion which you take and live while continuing to learn.
Thank you again and can't help but the way you presented is so orderly and so easy to grasp. I believe, I laid too much detail instead of just plain and simple question as What is trust? What does it do to our relationship?
then maybe it is not too branched out and get so confusing and if that is the case, I apologize for the misconception and misleading questions. but for those who understood my first and primary intentions leading to the answers simplified, thank you very much.
Simmo I do apologize for the complications that cause the confusion?
Yours truly,
SR
This is so profound Obstinance and this is where my direct question was coming from. How it is administer and how it affects the giver of the trust. I respect that so much. At the end of the day, is to just trust them. I would think so.
Thanks again.
SR
thank you again.
SR
I believe you have given me more that I thought I can benefit from in learning. Would have to read your points over and over again because in fact you have covered so much that I wasn't even aware of the various directions it was going to. But let me tell you, I have a full absorption of great learning on this one. thanks to all of you guys and your very colorful participations.
thanks
SR
Government sneeks its hand into your pocket using your trust as a shield so do many other people around manipulating your trust as a deadly weapon against yourself, the bigger it grows the more destructive it comes.
In my oppinion, TRUST shouldnt be something rewarding which you give to others based on your own subjective oppinion, formed within a time frame chosen by yourself, and depending on priority of circumstances also chosen by yourself only. TRUST commonly formed in that way means nothing, just your temporary feelings towards one person or another.
I honestly dont know much about another TRUST, which my parents trust me with or my friends, i tend to belive that is a kind of a very high level feeling which I do respect like a kind of religion which you take and live while continuing to learn.
Aisha, wow, I can't believe your beautiful argument or should I say logical and very subjective example on the matter relative to trusting peole.
and this is exactly what I was talking about. How it is given and or administered. We all know that once trust is lost, it does pretty much going to the drain and I do respect your argument.
thanks and I am honored to see you all on my blog.
SR
please go back yourself and read.
thank you.
Simmo, I am so grateful for your addition on the other aspect of our sentiments and emotions coupled by logic of course and that is respect. And yes I am sorry to have overlooked, and I do believe that in all your example not only did it make sense but that in the way you presented it, does make a lot of sense.
Thanks again, simmo.
SR
Thanks so much for your participation
SR
Thanks again dear friend
SR
does it automatically exist between certain people ?
Is it not part of the dating game to look for it.
In my opinion trust grows in some situations and dies in others.
Consider yourself lucky if you see it bloom, move on if you dont,
It is neither given or earned until you are in a position to do so.
Just don't ask me for money or ask me a personal question. But tell me anything you want. It will not be remembered!
Much to ponder on. Non.
Thanks again.
SR
Much to ponder on. Non.
Thanks again.
SR
Thanks for your visit Ed.
SR
Thinking too much about such values like trust and others will rather once even lead to its opposite like mistrust.
I think, feeling comfortable with each other is the best way for a good relatiohship.