Just go. You have the ticket, you've always wanted to go, just do it. Travelling alone and not being dependent on others has its own advantages. Just do it.
Black bream daddies clear the sea floor of debris in preparation for egg-laying. They then clear all other fish from the area until the babies are born.
RE: God Did It
11th Commandment:Thou shalt not introduce minors to the sniffing of solvents.
I take from that that it is ok to do it yourself as a consenting adult.