There are many reasons we slow down as we get older. My kids keep me going and motivated. Vitamins help too..
I have been making clothes for othere people since I was 9 years old and haven't used patterns since I was about 13. The kids just draw it for me and I make it.
I like to paint and write poetry and short stories. I also like to drive, do photography, walk on beaches, (of which we have many here), wood carving, stone carving, making clothes, knitting, embroidery, jewellery making, fishing, hill walking, socialising with my friends and spending time with my grandchildren, among other things.........
Again I see what you are saying here. You'd gain insight, which is invaluable, and experience and tolerance and beliefs outside your safe zone which allow us to grow and develop in ways that you can't even imagine until you've been there.
As for incompatibility, if someone told you at 6 years old that you'd be who and what and where you are right now, you'd never have believed them, because you couldn't imagine it. If they asked you at 12 or 20 to imagine concepts that you take for granted each day now, you wouldn't have been able to do it. You had step outside and embrace other things in order to become who you are right now.
I notice you haven't asked, would that do if I were compatible with them?.... It's like beware what you wish for, your wishes might come true... The thinking is ruled by fear....
If you were incompatible, you'd still have learned something and you'd have opened yourself up to a wider experience that you can draw on in later situations. You would have less fears.
Going to try to address your questions in small doses. Too many levels for me to tackle all at once.
I am not advocating any of this for you specifically. I am just saying that it is possible, and sometimes even advantageous to have no prerequisites.
There are problems with all of this, of course there are. For one, people don't all think alike. No two people's values are the same. In order for any of this to work people would have to believe it's possible and be willing to try it at least. (I'm sure many think I am crazy for even thinking this way but I've experiences the value of not having labels).
I do , however believe it is possible to get on with anyone within reason, (barring the mentally deranged here, like murderers etc), thought there are people who get on with those too and dont find them impossible to live with. I didn't.
As for self destructive habits, many people not only have those, but develop them over the years depending on how they cope with stress, their situations, life or whatever, while they are with partners who may not have stayed with them or chosen them had they had these habits to start with. Everything is relative.
I don't think that being in a situation that is different from our own is detrimental to our growth in any way. In fact I see it as the opposite. The more we live outside our comfort zones, the more we learn and improve on all levels.
Without writing a complete disertation on the subject I do tend to jump to bottom lines, sorry.
Ok. Generally, I find, that we do live with a person's toenail clipping techniques more often than we do with their political beliefs... Only an observation. The actual business of living day by day with someone who had perceived irritating habits would make some people feel worse than others.
To have some limited prerequisites has it's problems too, as in, which ones? Again they are different for eveyone. To find an exact match there would be nigh impossible.
It's all limiting.
I bet if everyone was honest they would want to be seen for who they are, accepted for who they are, and who they are is a combination of quirky little likes, dislikes, preferences and prerequisites.....so when a person has to choose or be chosen as a partner, they already have a list of limitations of varying levels, labels, that only get in the way of being accepted just as they are.....
Therefore, the only way to accept and , just as importantly, be accepted, is to have no prerequisites.
I understand what you are saying. It is important that we appear to give ourselves every advantage when choosing a partner and familiarity and cultural values are important to a certain extent.
Doesn't work for everyone though, in that some people hated their particular upbringing and that is a common factor too in how people become attracted, (common dislikes, so to speak), or some people hate sameness while others want it all exactly like it was for centuries.
It's only one level though. We make it so complicated in finding partners that even how we squeeze the toothpaste is important to some, or what kind of furniture we like, or what clothes we wear.
Values and perferences have a habit of adding to themelves if we don't watch out, until no one is a good candidate. Proof of this is in how many singles sites ther are, or how the figures have changed in how many people get married or make commitments for life.
It's an unwillingness to see a person, no matter what they are or who they are, for just being themselves, and taking it as an opportunity to learn something new that might add to who we are, by having no prerequisites...........creed, colour, race, or toothpaste-squeezing techniques........
That statement raises my hackles a bit in that it might suggest that people only chose people for their attractiveness or looks, and that perhaps they are just more labels........
Not sure if that is what you are saying here......
I think there are many things in life, to be fair about this, the consequences of which we cannot take responsibility for.
We cannot say there is no blame, be it people or circumstances, for some things, when to say that would be a lie.
Continuing to blame people etc is not right if there IS something we can do to change things, but that is not possible in all circumstances. Some things can't be changed or made better for us, whether we blame anyone or not.
Apportioning blame, or not, is only one facet of taking responsibility for one's actions. There are many others, and without balance in reasoning, everything is out of context. (Wisdom to know the difference).
Sometimes other people are responsible and we just have to "accept the things we cannot change", and move from there, leaving the blame where it is due. Acceptance is a form of moving on too.
1. Critical thinking - This is convergent thinking. It assesses the worth and validity of something existent. It involves precise, persistent, objective analysis. When teachers try to get several learners to think convergently, they try to help them develop common understanding.
2. Creative thinking - This is divergent thinking. It generates something new or different. It involves having a different idea that works as well or better than previous ideas.
3. Convergent thinking - This type of thinking is cognitive processing of information around a common point, an attempt to bring thoughts from different directions into a union or common conclusion.
4. Divergent thinking - This type of thinking starts from a common point and moves outward into a variety of perspectives. When fosering divergent thinking, teachers use the content as a vehicle to prompt diverse or unique thinking among students rather than a common view.
5. Inductive thinking - This is the process of reasoning from parts to the whole, from examples to generalizations.
6. Deductive thinking - This type of reasoning moves from the whole to its parts, from generalizations to underlying concepts to examples.
7. Closed questions - These are questions asked by teachers that have predictable responses. Closed questions almost always require factual recall rather than higher levels of thinking.
8. Open questions - These are questions that do not have predictable answers. Open questions almost always require higher order thinking.
Sounds a bit idealised to me. Too many possibilites for ifs, ands, buts, and maybes in there... No woman (or man for that matter), could live up to that description.
gingerb Forum Posts (4,139)
RE: Hobbies or Interests (Apart from CS)
There are many reasons we slow down as we get older. My kids keep me going and motivated. Vitamins help too..I have been making clothes for othere people since I was 9 years old and haven't used patterns since I was about 13. The kids just draw it for me and I make it.