Why is it?

Every day, I get up and then?dunno Is it old age? Is it the world that things don't matter anymore? Lack of demands on my time? The ability to do what I want, when I want..so do nothing?
My no routine is a routine. That irks me if anyone changes. Wake up at same time give or take a hour or two. Get up, dressed, TV news. Argh..it is Saturday..no news. sigh. Go outside and feed cat herd. Make coffee. And then..what. Could do this. Or that. That needs doing. Should be outside if nice. Why.
Lack of ambition? Lack of interest. Knowledge that when no one else cares? Or that when I am gone, what will change? Or all will change and no matter what I did, won't matter?blues
I feel like I am just treading water until the end. My I dont give a flock attitude.very mad
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Comments (11)

Tread water til the end.
Arrite, thanks for one of the most honest blogs ever written on here.
1) have a partner and make more out of that.
I don't care of he been there 4ever, or if you need a new one. Partner is a must.
2) if feeding the cats is not enough joy- (I can understand that)
make some change there as well. Either get rid of them, get more or other animals. Make a change.
3) can you write down on a note block what you would like to do and work towards that.
4) other- think

I hope I will not feel that way when I'm 70. If I do, I will sell everything and get my azz on some plane, somewhere where I'm useful or more happy. I would also like to serve God by following his son, but that is my own "secret" way out of jail/boredom card.

I hope you will find inspiration again. I consider this blog a warning to make the best out of life when the chance is still there.

I hope to die like my father: raking in my own garden. But not alone, like he was.

Hugs baby hug
Just in the end lost my letter.
Cor has been in the hospital for 11 days and was told this morning to count on another week.
I have not been able to play a video or TV as loud as I like because Cor may be sleeping. So have I played it now to my heart's content? One tape so far.
Had the TV fixed and the very next day it went on the frizz again.
Phoned for a repairman to come and they were so busy at 9.30, was told to leave my number and they would phone back. Waiting until 2.30, called again and the same message we will call you back. ( love this; Your call is important to us)
Now we can perform this dance again tomorrow.
So no TV now for about a week- ten days?
So worked a bit outside in the garden, and entertaining myself playing some games.
My favorite pass time is reading don't feel like it.
Orzz,z I think we should get together okay?.................doing what?frustrated
Hey mate!

You're a beautiful and strong woman... Keeping on with your keeping on! x

heart wings
Ok I'm a little puzzled, your profile shows serious painting skills and that you have a partner, this blog mentions neither?

But hey - it IS partly age, as we realise that most stuff people get agitated about either doesn't matter or there's nothing we can do about it anyway.

It IS mainly a lack of purpose, everyone needs a project, a goal, whatever age we are. Getting older mainly just shortens the list of options available, that's all. Don't waste wistful on the options now out of reach, there are others to be considered. BTW, you're creative. Create. Paint, write, try sculpting one of your cat herd out of clay?

Some days are diamonds. The others just have to be got through but go grin at yourself now in the mirror. grin
Hi Orzzz,

Lethargy has a lot to answer to and I guess being of an age doesn't help either. Your get up and go has gone walkabout but don't lose sight of it ,go after it and chase a few rainbows.hug
It is quite a surprise to have a 40 hr a week routing for 40 or 50 years then retire with no routine. My sleeping is all skewed but I have no problem with it. I can wake up in any 5 hour window and I'm okay with that. I find my kitchen is my happy place and I get to try a gazillion recipes with two tiny chihuahua's that turn their noses up a lot. I've discovered they love cheese sauce and I can get them to eat stuff they normally wouldn't. I don't have the ambition I used to have but I feel happy and content.
Sounds like you're existing without living sigh

Why does it matter so much to you, what matters to others or not?
or are you one of those who like to leave the world a better place than what you found it confused

you could have another two decades left in you yet, so hopefully you'll find something new of interest to do because that's too long a time to pass, doing nothing conversing

If you're looking for a new challenge, ever think about becoming a nun roll eyes

wow, never did I think the day would come when the lady with so much oiss&vinegar say life is so hoodrum...hmmm, what has happened? Try some B complex, rev your metabolism and then go from there..confused
Oh I keep going. Nothing else to do. I just know that what I like, do, create, value...will mean little to anyone else. My guy is the same mind as me. He talks about he wishes for a big bodyshop/garage. And says at this age why. So someone else can enjoy it? Or tear it down.
I have been to tons of auctions and re-sales. See stuff passed down go for pennies cause the inheritors view it as trash. Like 4 applique, new, gorgeous quilts I pulled from a load going to the dump. Granny made one for each grandkid and they tossed them out as junk. Go in re-sales and see creations of hand made stuff..tossed aside cause who wants that junk in THEIR home.
It is just at this age, it is hard to be enthusiastic anymore. Do to please self and hope just MAYBE, someone will care.
I did a southwest mural for my boss. When she sold the house after he died, the realtor made her repaint everything to white. That is what sells. If I knew a mural had been destroyed, I would have said you know what you can do with that house. I did murals for the neighbor..all painted over. The basement one because the son wanted the room painted black!
I guess it is called the doldrums. Yep..reading is a good escape. But, there are times that even that can be too much. When someone you love is ill, the only thing you want to do is sit and watch them. Like if you take your eyes away, they will leave you. Been there.
Rendezvous is this weekend. And it will be 95. So this is a year I will skip.
Like the song..is that all there is? Then lets keep dancing. Its just the dancing gets slower and slower.
Thanks for the feedback. I read it all.
Basically I read all what you write on cs, just so you know it.

It's true about the tossing away, I noticed the same.
Antiques and old school will only be kept if a trend of today
say it's in. It's a sad thing that part.
Some collectable cars is slowlly falling too, leaving only the tip of tops going upwords.

Well say hello to hubby boy from me and tell him If I was your neighbor
I'd make that body shop with him. We'd share the costs,
work and potential losses $) too giggle

Thank you. He isn't my husband. We will never marry..too independent for that. He lives 60 miles away and calls and shows up when he wants to spend a couple days. Right now he is re-making my 49 Chevy 3100. He missed his calling for sure. That is one thing that links us..classic cars. Only he has more than me by a couple dozen. I never got into the "collectibles". Bought a couple plates I liked, couple beanie babies I thought cute. Now I see the rip off they are. Re-sales have plates for a couple bucks. I saw the ENTIRE collection of red glass dishes from Avon someone had bought. Probably $400 worth. And at a song. I picked up 2 bowls, one cup and 2 plates cause I liked them when they came out. Probably the woman died and family tossed that "junk"
I can't stand car shows now that fill with fart poppers. Argh..what do you mean...a 2000 car is a classic!? crying
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Portage, Wisconsin, USA

Gearhead, farmer, buckskinner, survivallist, craftsman, recluse. [read more]

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created Aug 27
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