Can it work?
Long distance relationships are problematic and demand a lot of sacrifice; to say the least. It brings about many logistic problems. Visiting each other is fun, but once the romances had been sorted out, the real problems start; for such a relationship would require for at least one party to relocate.If the two parties live in the same country it is not too bad, but if they live in different countries it brings even more hurdles to overcome. Of which fiscal control is not nearly the least. One does not easily leave your life’s savings behind.
This can be further complicated by differences in culture, religion, tradition, careers and so many other things. Bear in mind that, because of the geography, the parties involved cannot know each other too well either.
Racial differences should not make it worse, but certainly do not make it easier either and serves very well to underline most the other issues. While one can change of religion, adapt to new culture, adopt new traditions and carve new careers, you cannot change your race. Not even with an operation. You will die being what you were born as.
And then I did not even talk about the tension, embarrassment and uneasiness that family, friends and strangers alike can bring about with their prejudice.
They say where there is a will there is a way. But is there a way to sort all these difficulties? It is easy to say one must reach a compromise, but compromise requires sacrifice. And one must be satisfied and contented with your sacrifice.
And then I ask myself; can it really work? Can love alone overcome all; or does it need a little help?
Comments (103)
Sardines are also fish... and if you eat enough you get full too.
I think for love you would be willing to move heaven and earth to be with that someone special.....my late husband was a German and he choose to stay in South Africa because that was where his heart was.....and yes initial there where many obstacles which had to be overcome....including a language barrier...
At least language will not be a problem here. I can speak the official language already.
But we did not meet yet.
As I said; this is only a feasibility study.
thanks for the interesting blog...as per usual
"Racial differences should not make it worse, but
certainly do not make it easier either and serves
very well to underline most the other issues. While
one can change of religion, adapt to new culture,
adopt new traditions and carve new careers, you
cannot change your race. Not even with an
operation. You will die being what you were born as."
Why would there by a need to change one's race? ... I think that's an old South African mentality (the Apartheid days) maybe?
Anyways I am an Indian South African now living Ireland .. Majority of the people are White but I don't feel out of place .... I love learning about this new land .... I share my knowledge and learn from others ...my guy and I have fun with each others difference, nothing we'd want to use to mock each other with ... I can't wait to take him to meet my family and burn his mouth with some hot Indian South African curry
You go for it .... The more love shared in the world the better life would be
It is a beautiful country and I love it, but is being managed very badly. Have you seen where we are on the corruption index. And I expect a huge plunge when the new one comes out
"About me:
Nope!. . I'm not looking for nobody yet! And
you cant write to me either, unless i send you a
message first. Until then. . ." Dont try too! And
dont view me no more. Just pass me on by.
Thanks buddy! "
You have known me for a long time now. Do you think I believed in LDR's?
But here I am.
I was not looking either; not even for a dating site. I Googled 'connectors for single electrical wires' and ended up here. I read on or two blogs and was hooked.
I believe we are, as with many other things, on par with our religious believes.
Of course, you may disagree and that is your right (as we are given free will), but I just wanted to make that point.
What I am confused about is why would you feel one has to change their race ? Could you please explain that part for me ...
And I do wish you all the best ... Hope it all works out for you
People change religion every day. In this country Muslim and Christian often intermarry and that requires conversion.
I myself, being Protestant married Catholic and my then wife converted. Today 33 years since we divorced she is still a devoted Protestant; which is not what she was while married to me. She renounced her Catholic faith and stuck to her decision.
We had bad blood for a long time and I thought we were both man enough to put it behind us. Let's not start it again.
I admit that the Church had caused a lot of misery in the past but that was a long time ago. Let's forget about it now.
If you are a non-believer I'm ok with it and respect you just the same. So please respect my believes too. And my blog as well as the visitors to it.
We don't have to like each other; but we can at least tolerate one another.
Hi Ness good to see you give my ol buddy a hard time. Keeps him on his toes. Regards to ur hubby.
Furthermore, my comments do not in any way limit anyone else's freedom to choose their own actions. In fact, I have stated that God gave us the freedom of choice. Otherwise he would have placed an electric fence around that tree that he warned not to eat the fruit from.
You too girl. Let's drop the subject now. This blog is about LDRs and not religious ideologues. Your point was made and your point was taken. No need for further elaboration.
I am actually being a lot nicer to Catfoot since he is a fellow South African like me ....
I reckon it could be a turn-on. And we have some beautiful young Xhosa girls and we see more and more mixed marriages all the time.
But then skin color is just a pigment of the imagination.
Yea noticed you going easy on on the poor guy..
Sorry for the hijack my friend.
Meer bek as binnegoed...
Those Chinese dolls are beautiful but not half pretty as my flower. Should be quite fun to become Chinese. Can change my name to Wat Wen Wong.
some beautiful young Xhosa girls and we see
more and more mixed marriages all the time."
I hope there are some beautiful young white girls there too ...
Oh then again skin colour is just a pigment of the imagination right?
anyways I wish you a positive future ..... Enjoy!