I'm 28, almost 29 and couldn't count on all my fingers and toes the number of times I've gotten emails from guys in their late fourties and fifties for more than just friends. Nothing against those guys; I'm sure they have alot to offer, but I'm one of those people who want to stay closer to the age range it states on my profile. Oh yeah, I forgot, no one reads those.
So this morning on the way to work, the radio djs were talking about what each of their different expertices were (ie repairs, cooking, intuition, etc). So that got me thinking - what are you an expert in? It can serious or silly.
To each his own, but I'd say go for it. If nothing else, you may make a great new friend, and no one's saying you have to jump into a relationship on the first date. I wonder why the age thing is important to you. We all have our preferences and reasons for them (ie. I don't wanna date someone who is old enough to date my mother), so you should decide why it's important to you and if the reasoning applies to her. JM2c Good luck!
If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome including toilet flush burials for dead goldfish, the story below will have you laughing out LOUD!
Short version: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet. Now, here's the long version:
Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was "something wrong" with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room.
"He's just lying there looking sick," he told me. "I'm serious Dad, can you help?"
I put my best lizard-healer statement on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I immediately knew what to do. "Honey," I called, "come look at the lizard!"
"Oh my! gosh," my wife diagnosed after a minute. "She's having babies."
"What?" my son demanded. "But their names are Bert and Ernie, Mom!"
I was equally outraged. "Hey, how can that be? I thought we said we didn't want them to reproduce," I accused my wife.
"Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?" she inquired. (I actually think she said this sarcastically!)
"No, but you were supposed to get two boys!" I reminded her, (in my most loving, calm, sweet voice, while gritting my teeth together).
"Yeah, Bert and Ernie!" my son agreed.
"Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you know," she informed me. (again with the sarcasm, you think?)
By now the rest of the family had gathered to see what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make the best of it.
"Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience, I announced. "We're about to witness the miracle of birth."
"Oh, gross!" they shrieked.
"Well, isn't THAT just great! What are we going to do with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?" my wife wanted to know. (I really do think she was being snotty here, too. Don't you?)
We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later.
"We don't appear to be making much progress," I noted.
"It's breech," my wife whispered, horrified.
"Do something, Dad!" my son urged.
"Okay, okay." Squeamishly, I reached in and grabbed the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug. It disappeared. I tried several more times with the same results.
"Should I call 911," my eldest daughter wanted to know. "Maybe they could talk us through the trauma." (You see a pattern here with the females in my house?)
I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not understand why their computer would not turn on.
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1st Person: 'Do you know anything about this fax-machine?' 2nd Person: 'A little. What's wrong?' 1st Person: 'Well, I sent a fax, and the recipient called back to say all she received was a cover-sheet and a blank page. I tried it again, and the same thing happened.' 2nd Person: 'How did you load the sheet?' 1st Person: 'It's a pretty sensitive memo, and I didn't want anyone else to read it by accident, so I folded it so only the recipient would open it and read it.'
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I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you need some help?' I asked. She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?' 'Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked. 'No, just this remote 'thingy,'' she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries...it's a long walk.'
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Tech Support: 'What does the screen say now.' Person: 'It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'.' Tech Support: 'Well?' Person: 'How do I know when it's ready?'
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My friend called his car insurance company to tell them to change his address from Texas to Vermont. The woman who took the call asked where Vermont was. As he tried to explain, she interrupted and said, 'Look, I'm not stupid or anything, but what state is it in?'
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Several years ago we had an intern who was none too swift. One day he was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use copier paper,' she told him. With that, the intern took his last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies.
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I was working the help desk. One day one of the computer operators called me and asked if anything 'bad' would happen if she dropped coins into the openings of her PC. I asked her if this was something she was thinking of doing. She said, 'never mind' and hung up. So I got out my trusty tool kit and paid her a visit. I opened her CPU case and sure enough, there was 40 cents.
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One of our servers crashed. I was watching our new system administrator trying to restore it. He inserted a CD and needed to type a path name to a directory named 'i386.' He started to type it and paused, asking me, 'Where's the key for that line thing?' I asked what he was talking about, and he said, 'You know, that one that looks like an upside-down exclamation mark.' I replied, 'You mean the letter 'i'?' and he said, 'Yeah, that's it!'
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This person had a broken lamp which he wanted to discard. Unfortunately, the power cord ran under his refrigerator, making it impossible to move the lamp while the cord was attached. He decided to cut the cord, since the lamp was unusable anyway. He didn't remember to unplug it first. I found him in the hallway rolling back and forth.
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I was in a car dealership a while ago when a large motorhome was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in 'Twister.' I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the cruise control, then went in back to make a sandwich.
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I called a company and asked to speak to Bob. The person who answered said, 'Bob is on vacation. Would you like to hold?'
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I rented a movie from Blockbuster. Before the movie begins a message comes on the screen saying, 'This movie has been altered to fit your television screen.' Comment from person: 'How do they know what size screen I have?'
A burglar broke into a house one night. He shone his flashlight around, looking for valuables. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack, when a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark saying, "Jesus is watching you."
He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flash light off, and froze. When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his head and continued. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard, "Jesus is watching you."
Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.
"Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot. "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you that he's watching you"
The burglar relaxed "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler Jesus."
Yep, she's a silver Chevy Cavalier, so it fits her perfectly. I'm very protective of her too. She doesn't have an alarm, but if I see someone I know getting too close to her, I hit the panic button. People tend to stay away from her now.
lanabyte Forum Posts (1,223)
RE: Who lie more: Women or mans?
I've found alot of shorter guys lie about their height.