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Things that don't go together...

Years ago, I formulated a list of things that (I believe) don't go together. The list disappeared, so I'm starting over again.

Pineapple on Pizza. Seriously, that got started when someone was stoned on pot and while phoning in an order couldn't think what toppings to choose. The guy taking the order thought he'd fu*k with him and suggested pineapple. Word got out through all the pizza parlors that any time a stoner called and needed help making a selection, offer up the pineapple. I'm sure of this... so you don't have to Google or Snopes. Trust me on this one!

Black socks and recycled truck tire sandals. What are you guys thinking? You know it's banned at no less than 20 resorts throughout the world.

More later...
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Then and now: Stevie Nicks or Christine McVie...

I did a CS poll about two women who costarred on a 1960's TV show called Gilligan's Island, where passengers on a small fishing boat got lost at sea and ran aground on an island. One woman (Ginger) was a movie star and the other (Mary Ann) was a country girl.
Although they had totally different looks and attitudes, guys were often asked who they thought was more attractive. Ginger or Mary Ann?
The show ran from 1964 to 1967 and syndicated reruns forever but it was after a few seasons, I (like many others) grew tired of the moody actress Ginger and thought Mary Ann made the best choice.

The same comparisons were given to the two women in the British rock band Fleetwood Mac. The front woman Stevie Nicks with the deep sultry voice and keyboardist/backup singer Christine McVie with the higher sweeter voice.

Interestingly, Fleetwood Mac had some love arrangements. Stevie and singer/guitarist Lindsey Buckingham joined in 1974 were a duo prior. Christine and husband bassist John McVie joined in 1967.

As you have it Stevie topped the polls in the beginning and later it was determined that Christine was the best choice.


Thanks for reading my blog!
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Getting real about real estate...

I've accelerated my home shopping this month.
Last week, I went to see some single story townhouses. 1 and 2 bedroom 4-plex units in a 55+ community. I like the idea that parking is near each unit and some separation between buildings. Easy in and out of the development, but no gate or security guard.

There are some negative aspects... low ceilings, small bedrooms, baths & closets. The place is dreary and depressing to me, inside and out. The buildings are old and some appear that repairs aren't as timely as they should be. Coin operated laundry shared by each 4-plex. We met one guy who has been flipping units there, that could be something viable since I'm in the remodeling business. My daughter has flipped a few units over the years and mentioned she would partner with me on such a venture. For what they offer, the asking prices seemed high. Yes... negotiate, negotiate, negotiate.

I learned some important shopping tips from shopping with women. Men are different. A guy will buy the first thing that looks good. Women won't see a first choice... everything is a second or third choice. If a woman finds something that meets ALL of her search criteria, she will continue to shop for something better!

This week, I've been getting links from an agent featured in a different place. 3 and 4 story condos in a gated community. The development is easily ten times larger than the place with townhouses. Priced better, the 2 bedroom units are in the same price range as the 1 bedroom townhouses and the HOA is also less. There are more restrictions in the condos, including no pets (good) coin laundry shared by many. Some buildings must be primary residences... renters are not allowed. Personally, I think that would make the units hold their value.

Getting in and out of gated communities has it's delays. All the listings talk about the amenities. Pool, spa, exercise room, golf, theater... all the things I have no interest in. I'm really not looking forward to condo life. Stairs, assigned parking 50 yards away, laundry at the end of the wing.

The community is predominately Jewish. I worry we would be considered as outsiders. My wife has no religion and I worship internet. I mentioned to a friend about acceptance there and he said "Put that out of your mind." I'm also concerned if the community would be prejudice toward my Chinese wife. Again, he said "No worries mate, she's friendly and outgoing, they'd be drawn to her in an instant."

We are meeting the agent to look at some units tomorrow. Hopefully, everything goes well and we'll see something we like.
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Sunday drivers...

I was on the highway at 9 this morning headed to a meeting with a real estate agent. They forgot to alert me today was the contest to see who could out maneuver who. I wanted no part of it, especially knowing this road is notorious for unmarked Highway Patrol cars... including the 'wanna race?' setups.

Oh, you didn't know about them?? A friend of mine decided to be part of a race already in session and when they came over the ridge, several police (with radar guns) were waiting to 'see your drivers license, registration and proof of insurance.'

Back to the drive... Sunday morning is great if you want to see people with vintage vehicles out for a Sunday drive. Today I got to see a nice roadster. I'm guessing a 1930's Ford. It had lots of high performance modifications like wide tires, big carburetors and short header exhaust. The car had a blue license plate signifying 'antique' so it was the real deal and not a 'put together' roadster.

Years ago, a client of mine had a 1957 Bel Air convertible with a Corvette engine in perfect condition. He 'ball parked' the value over $200,000 to the right buyer. He would take it to classic car shows and on rare occasion drive down 'the strip' on a Saturday night.

The coolest (in my opinion) antique car I've seen on the road happened to be early one Sunday morning, I pulled alongside a Ford roadster that must have been late 1920's to early 1930's. It was immaculate, you would think it came here via a time machine. The light turned green and some guy in an SUV behind the old car starts blowing the horn!

Obviously, he didn't appreciate Sunday drivers...
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Laundry is perpetual...

My entire bachelor life I did laundry nights and weekends at no specific intervals. The dryer is often a holding spot until I have to put wet clothes in it. I bought several plastic bins (love the clear ones) for storing clean clothes that I cannot fold after they are dry and colored bins for dirty clothes. My strict rule is I don't use the colored bins for clean laundry.

The washer and dryer on are a back patio, a screened room with a covered aluminum roof. We can do laundry any time of the day or night and no one gets disturbed by the sound of the machines running.

My wife has taken on the responsibility of laundry duty and I always have clean clothes. Typically, I would wear jeans only once and that means lots of clothes get washed each week. Coworkers often wear shorts and I can see many wear the same garment several days in a row. It's an office environment and my position changed over the years as I once was a project manager in and out of construction sites, I decided (this year) to wear jeans 2 days before tossing them into the dirty laundry bin. Less wear and tear on the clothes and less laundry.

I did a blog not long ago about the HE (High Efficiency) washer that was too abrasive and frayed some of my favorite jeans. That problem has been resolved now.

Last week, my wife spent the night with a friend who has a young daughter. There was a Jewish holiday and the little girl was out of school so they planned a day at a tourist attraction and they all went together.
I did a load of laundry (towels) and felt bad because I didn't have time to fold and put them away... after all, laundry is perpetual.
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I got pulled over for speeding...

On the way back from the Mexican shoemaker 'Zapatos' I had my new boots on and suddenly I see some blue lights flashing in my rear view mirror. It was the police signaling me to pull over. I did and he told me to present my driver's license, registration and proof of insurance. I explained I'm unable to reach for my wallet and I needed to get out of the car. He stepped back to allow me to do so and when he saw my new boots he began laughing uncontrollably. Shaking his head he understood why I was speeding.
"Yeah officer, I just got these boots 15 minutes ago and didn't realize this would be a problem when I started driving."
The officer told me he would let me off with only a warning and to promise to remove the boots when I was driving. "It's a deal" I said.



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Good thing I wasn't wearing my 'Saturday Night dancing boots"

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Funny Johnny Carson's quips...

Two generations stayed up late watching Johnny Carson host of the Tonight Show.
I remember friends repeating some of the funny things he said. If you know the show, his side kick and co-host Ed McMahon would often lead Johnny into something funny.
For example:
Johnny would say "It was really hot today"
Ed would comment "How hot was it Johnny"
Carson would come back with "It was so hot, I saw a bird cooking a worm on the sidewalk"
Typically, there would be a rimshot from the band's drummer signifying a joke!

Some of the people he interviewed said funny things and they both would laugh to tears.
That's the way it was with Johnny.

There was a blooper when he interviewed the wife of famous pro-golfer Jack Nicklaus. He asked her if she did anything to give him good luck before an important match. She replied "I kiss his balls" Realizing what she had said, she corrected herself by saying "his golf balls" but that was too late as Johnny had the comeback "I bet that made his putter rise to the occasion" totally embarrassed, she left the stage.

I didn't get to see it, but another memorable moment was when Zsa Zsa Gabor was on the show. She was sitting in the chair with a cat on her lap. When she asked Johnny if he wanted to pet her p*ssy he said...


It was brought up years later by Jane Fonda.

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The eye of a hurricane...

I was looking at photos of hurricane Michael that came through the Florida Panhandle today. Having lived in South Florida for nearly 60 years I've seen many hurricanes including ones that came across my city where we experienced the eye of a hurricane.
The experience you receive is a hundred plus miles per hour wind and rain, then the eyewall passes over you'll likely to find the rain stops, the wind stops and it is all quiet for more than 20 minutes. As you reach the back part of the eye wall the wind and rain hits you in the opposite direction from the way it originally passed over you. Very creepy.


Katrina in 2005
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If you ask if I recall going outside in the eye of a hurricane with an umbrella and a skateboard, my reply would be yes.
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Complaint Desk...

I was in multi-tasking mode today. Lots of interruptions. More than any normal Monday.
Working hard to close a deal, I sent revised drawings and prices to a client Friday so she and her husband can review. The call came early with 4 important requests... something that would take an hour or so got started several times, but I had to resolve a few emergency complaint requests. I got back on it around 7pm and worked a few more complaints until 7:50pm when my wife summoned me to head home. Here it is 10:50pm and I'm taking a few minutes to digest dinner, do a blog and get back to work to finish what I planned to do this morning.
I'm getting good at resolving complaints but not good at getting any of my work done.

A bad one I want to keep distance on is an order that took 2 weeks to process and the factory acknowledged 8 weeks to complete. Their acknowledgement isn't accurate as they are running 2 weeks behind, so that makes a total of (counts on fingers and toes) 12 weeks when the salesman told the customer 8 weeks.
They (the clients) are 'freaking out' as they sold their previous unit and won't have a working kitchen or bath when they move into the new place. The client is angry and doesn't want to talk to the salesman... he want's a 'higher-up' to call (clears throat) and that would be me, but since I know nothing about the order I'm expecting the factory to make some changes and complete the order on the acknowledgement date.

I thought by going home the complaint desk would be closed. My boss texted me to complain about something else that needs to be resolved tonight.

That said... The complaint desk is now open!
super
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whiplash...

Sometimes I sneeze so hard I get whiplash!
After lunch I decided to get out of the office for a few minutes. Sitting in my car with the temperature around 90 degrees farenheit listening to music. That was enough to blast a neck breaking sneeze.
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Spending a million bucks to look like a million bucks...

I have some wealthy clients who know a healthy diet and exercise doesn't always 'hold back the years' and they resort to a little 'nip & tuck' (read: plastic surgery) to maintain their youthful appearance.

Many years ago, I was working for a custom millwork shop and assigned to work on a project for the new offices of a famous plastic surgeon. It was reported his first client scheduled in the new facility was actor Leslie Nielson. This happened shortly before he filmed The Naked Gun movie.

You can quote me on this: "Good plastic surgery is when people say you look terrific and scratch their head wondering how you look so fine and they don't."

I knew a local designer who really got his money's worth. They pulled his face tight... like a bongo drum! It was so strange, people often talked about it. He wore a full wig but his arthritic body appeared to be screaming in pain. You could see darkened age spots in his hands. I'm guessing he was in his 70's.

A boss I worked for was Scottish and had the trait of 'Jawls' where his cheeks drooped and eyelids also had excessive skin. His son had the same traits/characteristics and after graduating high-school had surgery to remove his baggy eyelids. The surgeon trimmed the extra skin at the fold line/wrinkle in his eyelids. Surgery... success.
Exercise made sweat drip into his eyes causing irritation. After surgery the problem was greatly reduced.

Maybe you've seen the real-life woman obsessed to look like Barbie, where the young woman had a Blepharoplasty... literally tightly pulling the skin around her eyes. Frightening to think someone so young would spend so much on looks... considering she was beautiful to start with.

I used to say, when turn 60 I'm going to have my 'bags fixed' a trait with me as long as I can remember, including baby pictures. I've heard all excuses why I have them... lack of sleep, allergy, hereditary. Instead of a trip to a plastic surgeon, I took a trip to China and that was a better investment. The idea plastic surgery has dropped so far down on my do list I'm not thinking about it anymore.

Everyone has reasons to justify plastic surgery. Not every surgery comes out as expected. There are hundreds of internet photos showing botched facelifts, many are of movie stars... people who can afford the best, unfortunately it turns out to be the worst.

I discussed with my wife if she wanted a boob job. We know it's expensive. I've got some of the money saved and I would have to take a bank loan for the rest. She doesn't want to go into debt over surgery, so my only suggestion is to get one boob done now and the other when we have more money.
laugh
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Nutthin' to FRET about...

Stringed instruments have been around for thousands of years. Typically, all have a neck where the musician can press up or down the smooth fingerboard to raise or lower the pitch. The violin family, for example has the smallest to largest, violin, viola, cello, bass that all have 4 strings that are bowed or plucked. Years of practice are required to play and be in-tune with these instruments.

Guitars and banjos have a shorter learning curve probably due to metal wires embedded into the fingerboard at spaces that conform to standard musical steps, E, F, F#, G, etc... This makes it easier to be in-tune when playing chords.

A (very) small percentage of guitars are made without frets that allow musicians to emulate the sounds of violins giving the natural ability to slide up or down and easily create vibrato effects. It's a totally different instrument as one who doesn't have the accuracy of holding notes in the right spot with be sharp or flat.

I went through at least 20 videos to select one where the style of play shows off good technique of playing a fretless guitar. Here's a perfect example:

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