Elephant Stew
Following the decision to utilize the carcasses of animals that fell victim to poachers, elephant carcasses became available in moderate quantities. To pave the way for the Elephant Carcass Export Company (ECEC) I founded last week, I bring you a recipe on how to prepare this African delicacy.
Ingredients
1 Large African Elephant carcass (Loxodontus Africana)
200 Bags Of Salt
500 Kg Pepper Corns
750 Pockets Of Potatoes
300 Bushels Of Carrots
200 Pockets Of Onions
200 Kg Of Parsley
1 Rabbit
Method
Cut the elephant in bite-sized chunks. This will take about six weeks.
Chop vegetables into cubes. Another four weeks.
Place meat in jumbo size missionary pot.
Add 5123.25 liters of water. (fire hose suggested)
Simmer for 28 days
Shovel in salt and pepper to taste.
When meat is tender add vegetables. (Electric conveyer belt recommended)
Simmer for another 14 days with the lid on.
Garnish with parsley
Serve warm on a bed of cold rice
The recipe serves about 3000 people. If more guests are expected, add the rabbit. However, this is not recommended because very few people like hare in their stew.
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Have a joyful week.
Comments (53)
Pigs are problematic. I think I will pass on it and stick to elephant meat. My blog tomorrow will deal with pigs.
I regret having to leave you now but I have an appointment in 35 minutes from now. If I don't leave now, I will be late.
As I am all for recycling, this recipe is not so distasteful in dealing with the remains of the poor elephant! I will go along with the recipe but why do we have to be "warm on a bed of cold rice" to serve it?
What shall I say? When in Africa you do as the Africans do.
Oh, we do. Even with milk and sugar for breakfast.
As I said to Avias, When in Africa, do as the Africans do.
Yes, why not?
Sorry. I missed your comment earlier on.
Those five male rats huddled together were making plans to sabotage the electric fence but then the females spoiled it all with their impatience. They should have trusted the males to sort out the problem in good time.
But we only have Asian elephants here and they are much much smaller. So, I reduce the other ingredients or what? And the cooking time too? Instead of a rabbit, can I substitute with a rat?
The Asian elephants are not as tasty and are known to be tough. Rather try for the African variety.
Replacing the rabbit with a rat may reduce the hare in the stew but I would suggest two rats as they are smaller than rabbits and you may not be able to feed all your guests.
How's life?