Family drama that can't be avoided

I'm living my dream. I retired from my job of 20 years in Orlando in April to move to Tampa just 2 miles from my folks. I wanted to be a helping hand but before the accident they didn't need me too much, now they do.

Mom fell last week at a doctor's office during a stress test. She was sent to hospital by ambulance ($$). Turns out she dislocated her should which they had to pop back in, a giant hemotoma the size of a grapefruit on her hip and a huge gash on her leg.

I'm upset that someone didn't assist an 82 yr old woman with Parkinson's off the x-ray chair and into the other room they were sending her. Without assistance she fell and has been in horrible agony since. I contacted the most advertsied "slip & fall" attorney, Morgan & Morgan only to find out they don't want the case. I called the FL State Bar for another referral and will deal with that Monday. Mom may not want to sue because she is afraid she won't be able to see her beloved doctor.

As luck would have it my 28 yr old nephew, their grandson is staying with the folks temporarily so between the both of us it's good.

However after 9 days of hardly any sleep I have brain fog and have come home to spend one night in my own bed. With Dad's wandering mind, the challenges are interesting in what he does and doesn't remember but he is still good at barking orders. I'm still bad at getting frustrated instead of just agreeing and letting it go.

Since I'm so blessed to still have my folks. I tried hard to get from Orlando to Tampa but was more loyal to my job. Luckily my bossed pushed the issue of me retiring and let me go slowly by taking duties away over the last two years. I made it to Tampa 8 months ago and as hard as this job is, caring for one's parents, I'm still thankful to have them.

I'm not the best care taker because I'm clueless but I'm open to new experiences. Wish me luck.
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Comments (9)

It is difficult looking after parents, because much and all as you love them, you are emotionally as well as physically involved, and that is taxing.
Try to take as many breaks from it as you can, whenever you can. Even short breaks. Go for walks, go to the cinema etc. Anything to give your brain a break.
Hello Unfayzed wave Taking care of elderly can be a trying experience, and when it comes to taking care of elderly parents, it is so much more trying. My mother died of cancer 5 yrs ago , and I was the main caregiver for the last two yrs. It wasn t till after Moms passing , did I realize what it took on my health. Besides being physically demanding, it drains a person mentally. To this day I can t believe what I put myself thru . Molly s advice from earlier is something I should of done thumbs up All I can say is remember, You can t be strong for others, if you re not strong for yourself.
Despite being tired and stressed, it sounds to me, like you have your head mostly in the right place.
We must remember, that our parents did lots of things daily to overcome challenges & frustrations in raising us. This is our way of partially paying them back for their patience, care and stamina involved in raising us.
Thank you Molly, Jim and One - I'm learning as I go and realized a break is needed. I've now had one night's great sleep and am raring to go, only it is too early for the rest of the world.

I think it did me good therapy to write it off my chest. Thanks again.

Smiles and be nice to someone
Mom fell last week at a doctor's office during a stress test.

Reading that made me queasy...
Sorry to hear such bad news.
I know the word 'sue' sets up hackles everywhere, but did you call the beloved doctor and ask them to pick up the bill for the ambulance and treatment? It seems sad to me that they didn't offer, but I appreciate their insurance company forbids them to do the decent thing, as it would be admitting liability and open them to a lawsuit.

As for your care of your parents, you're a good person. handshake
When the bills start coming in, I will pursue the doctor's office handing IF my parents let me get involved. They think very differently than me.
I was in this situation back in the 90s, is not easy

also brought quarrels amongst brothers and sisters

not easy
it actually can be avoided...its a choice to engage in it or not....me I refuse.....wave
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UnFayzed

UnFayzed

Tampa, Florida, USA

I like being different, hate describing myself. I have many life long friends and come from a large family. Will not consider a long distance relationship. [read more]

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created Jan 2019
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