It Is All In The Mind.

Hindus don’t eat cows because they are holy while Muslims and Jews don’t eat pigs because they are unholy. So if I have it right, an animal must be unholy before the Hindus will eat it but it must be holy before the Muslims or Jews will eat it. Then do I have to have a steak and a pork chop on my plate so they can cancel each other, just to have a normal, balanced meal?

Many, many years ago I had a Jewish colleague and he arrived at my home one Sunday just as my wife was serving our Sunday lunch. We were having a leg of pork. He came to fetch something and I did not know him that well.

Hell, that chicken and gravy looks delicious. Don’t you want to give me some as well, he said

Colin, it is pork, I said.

It is only pork if you say so, he said looking very disappointed.

Ok, I said somewhat puzzled, thinking that he may be offended by the pork. You’re right. It is chicken.

Can I have some, I’ll pay for it, he said with a smile.

Realizing that he was a bachelor, I invited him to join us for lunch and told my wife to dish up another plate of food. We sat down and he finished his plate before asking if perhaps there was more of the ‘chicken’ and my wife complied.

After lunch we agreed to cook the same food in four weeks time and he undertook to pay for all the ingredients if my wife would prepare it. We agreed. It turned out that this Jew boy had a weakness for pork.

This went on for about five years, even after he left the company and continued until he was transferred to Johannesburg. I wonder if he found somebody there as well to cook his ‘chicken’.

One Sunday a month he would arrive, sit down for lunch, look at the food and ask me what it was, pointing at the pork. It became a ritual.

Colin, it is chicken, I would say and he would ask. Are you sure?

Yes, positively, I would say and we would enjoy the food. He always had a second helping of ‘chicken’ before leaving the money for the next meal before departing.

One night at a work function I asked him what would happen if he ate pork without knowing about it. Nothing, he said looking at me with a straight face. The sin will be on the one who lied to me.

I guess there will be no mercy on me.


Have a great day and eat nothing holy or unholy.