Then That’s It.
All good things must come to an end. I guess the same applies to the not so good. They too must end; only sooner than later.
For the past few months I’ve been in a relationship with a completely incompatible woman. She’s a social butterfly who loves those boring parties where you float from person to person, making small talk about any BS, ranging from the weather to baby care and everything in between, excluding current affairs and politics, while wetting her lips on a glass of red wine all evening.
I, on the other hand, prefer to attend, at the most, one rowdy party per month while spending the rest of the time in small company, maybe just the two of us or one or two other couples, dining out, braaiing, go dancing or whatever.
We recognized our differences very early on and often discussed it. Our tastes in music differ, we do not agree in our political views, and we have very different religious views. We realized that it could not last, yet we hanged on to each other because we enjoyed each others company when we were together. We decided to enjoy it while it lasted; marking time, I suppose, waiting for something better to show up.
As usually, I did not see her this weekend but she came around last night. We went to a nearby pub for an hour or so and watched a movie (Avatar) at home afterwards. This morning, just before she left, she dropped the bomb. This was the last time, she said. After a night of more passion than the norm, she pecked me on the cheek and said good-bye.
You could have knocked me over with a feather. I knew it was coming, yet the news surprised me. My mind was in turmoil while I walked her to her car. It is her birthday tomorrow and I bought her a fairly expensive gold chain. I'm scared that if I give it to her now, she may think that I'm trying to buy her back.
As she got into the car, she said she’ll call me later and drove off.
So, that’s it then. At least we parted as friends.
You have a wonderful day, will you.
Comments (74)
I did not meet her on a dating site. She was introduced to me by friends.
No, I did not ask her and I won't be doing so. I never ask people about their motives.
But I do have a theory. It explains the why but not the how.
We won't try again. We both know it cannot work. As I said, at least were still friends. I'm not upset with her; only confused about the how.
It is kind of strange she did not explain and tell you what her reasoning was, however.
My theory is that she met somebody very recently who she'd rather be with tomorrow night, which is not a pain, the unspoken agreement was that whoever is ready first, moves on.
As I said; it only explains the why. The how is still a mystery. Why spend another night with me if she really wants to be with somebody else.
Well, I noticed a lot of opinion and some advice here. I'm already healing.
That just won't seem right. I'd hate to receive a gift that was intended for somebody else.
Just guessing, you met through friends and could cross path again - so leaving on "a good note" might make things easier should you run into each other again.
As for ending it before her birthday - she probably guessed that you have a present for her and doesn't want to be in your debt (as not giving you a present on your birthday).
Hope life treats you well otherwise.
Nobody would ever know.....well.......except for you and the other 200 over CS members who have read this blog....
An expensive gift would not have left her in my debt. She spent a fair amount on me during the time and if anybody is in debt it would be me. No, I don't think it was about that.
She obviously thought long and hard in the timing and chose prior to her Bdayt not to make it look like. She was in it for the gift So, respect her choice and either downgrade or forget about it..send her a nice email bday card.
True, but I will know.
But all other things aside, we had some great times together and she did not do me short. I'll give it a day or two and then I'll give it to her in any way. I think she deserves it and she spoiled me a bit as well. My only fear is that she may think that I'm trying to buy her back.
It's over, I wouldn't contact her or give her a gift.
Bea is a sister to me. Besides, her latest fan is very jealous and he's likely to flush it down the toilet because she won't lie about the origins of it.
Mind you, that is another relationship, I think, that won't last for too long.
We can only be happy in the short run. Our differences are too many and too deep. I'm happy to be just friends with her and I think she feels like that too.
She has already called me to hear if I'm ok. I cannot see that we'll be losing contact altogether. Maybe she just wants to 'cool' it a bit.
I don't know. We had some great fun and she surprised me on two occasions with gifts that would have cost a few bucks even though she knew that our affair could not last. No, I'd give it to her.
You may be right to some extend, but when I bought it two weeks ago it was a birthday gift. Even now, the payback is not that important, she never expected anything in return. As I said so many time, she was a great gal when we were together and she never did me short. Breaking up was in the pipeline all the time, it was just a matter of who was going to do it first. I think if I broke up, she would have felt no different than what I feel now. In fact, she probably feels the same at this moment.
Sorry to hear of the breakup! Stay friends if you like and chat on the phone! But that will make it harder to forget her! The quickest way to forget her is to find someone else fairly soon!
You are a good man, Cat! You won't have any problem finding someone else!
thank you, I'm sure it's ok.
look, we were never in love with each other. Yes, we enjoyed our times together bur our activities kept us apart most of the time. We only saw each other once or twice a week and then she'd sleep over. When I take stock of it all, it was a matter of convenience. Only seldom did we spent time together over weekends, we normally went our own ways because we did not share the same interests.
I found her activities utterly boring and she felt the same about me.
I'm not heartbroken; just perplexed and confused. Especially after last night. She called me as if nothing had happened and reminded me that we have a date for tonight. So there goes my theory about her strange behavior.
Well at least you got out there and tried...
Here is to better luck with love next time..
Gosh, I have not seen you for a very long long time!
Yea, we tried and it was good while it lasted.
Yes it has been awhile...needed to ajust to the new format...and a break Too!
Cheers
One has to get away from this place now and then.