I did a workshop about a year ago and as part of it the group (who were reasonably familiar with each other) were asked to line themselves up in a row from very masculine to very feminine according to how they identified in terms of gender.
One woman placed herself in the middle of the blokes. One bloke who viewed himself as more masculine than her, presented as quite soft and gentle with long, flowing hair. Two of the men who viewed themselves as more feminine than her - one was a huge, hulking great bloke, the other had no hair, bovver boots and identified with the punk movement. You couldn't get two more masculine presenting men.
I jostled for middle ground with a woman who had about four, or five brothers, two sons and no sisters, or daughters. At that point, all the women (apart from the one who identified as having more male characteristics) all bundled into the middle ground regardless of how girly in outward appearance, or mannerisms with protestations of being fed up of being forced into a gender role stereotype that simply wasn't working for them.
It was like a collective cry of wanting to be seen as ourselves and wanting the freedom to be ourselves, not a gender stereotype.
All this manly/girly/lady stuff is a false imposition.
Finding one's own truth and minimising projecting one's own stuff onto others.
Allowing others to find their own truths in their own time.
Btw, I'm not claiming it's easy. It's a long journey of trial and error, but I can recommend a convenient bit of internet space where we have the opportunity to explore and grow if we choose.
I'm thinking the Staffie truly lived in the present. Staffie Past didn't tell Staffie Present about all the times Owner Past rescued her by the back paws during her previous seagull chasing attempts and Staffie Present didn't bother to inform Staffie Future about the hazards of being aerodynamically unsound.
Staffie Present chases seagulls.
Sandwich Dog Present however, predicts Shut Fridge Present can become Open Fridge Future with the help of Sandwich Dog Future, who can become Sandwich Dog Present With Glee and knows Sandwich Dog Future won't be scolded by Closed Fridge Owner Future.
Sandwich Dog Past, Present and Future eats sandwiches.
jac_the_gripper Forum Posts (5,363)
RE: Gold Diggers
S'okay, you can use your bare hands and teeth.