Usually starting at about now, I can sense that impending change in the air where summer is ending and fall is about to start. Its nice and warm here today but I can sense that something in the air that says fall is soon coming.
That means that it will be mushroom season and this year, I am going to try to find some for nostalgic sake's.
I am giving up smoking cigarettes. Patch really works.
Feel free to add to this one.
Don't take laxatives and sleeping pills on the same night.
Whatever is going on will pass. It may pass like a kidney stone but it will pass.
Cats and waterbeds don't mix well.
Garlic flavored breath mints was never meant to be.
If life gives you lemons, throw them at your enemies.
Everything in life is either fattening or illegal.
A young man goes to a whorehouse to experience his first taste of sex.
The madam suggests that he starts with a 69.
He decides to give it a try.
The prostitute leads him to a room, gets undressed, and instructs the young man what to do.
Unfortunately, just as he starts, she farts, the man quietly says to himself "PHEW" but he goes down on her again.
A moment later, she farts again, he says "PHEW" but continues.
Once more she farts, this time he immediately gets up and starts walking out.
She asks him "What’s wrong?"
He replies, "I don't think I can take another 66 of those!
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