There's been times when it hurt so bad, that I was on a suicidal, drug using, drunk; and when I showed up at her funeral, I didn't own a shirt or shoes, and hadn't bathed since the day before she was killed.
Now I can almost see her eyes when I close mine; and I can feel her presence; and it comforts me.
It makes me cry when I ask myself this question; but, I wouldn't trade the little bit of time we shared, for anything on earth.
There's times when living in this world pains me, knowing that she was my once in a lifetime love: but when I remember the way she looked at me, and the love she gave me, I feel like we're still together in some quantum parallel universe.
I've had a love that still strengthens me, even though she's been dead since 1979.
I was talking about that love, when you began blaming me because you're a loser.
That's an option when we sign up.
Blaming and controlling, you're NOT gonna make some woman very happy.
Here comes the begging...
I apologized when you first disagreed with me; but that wasn't enough for you to look for good in me...
Yeah, we can see how positive you are... More blamming.
As I already said, I apologized when you first disagreed with me: which appears to have emboldened you into thinking you can blame me because you're a loser, and tell me to shut up, and what to do...
You're the one who is obviously hostile to me; and I'm not talking it.
No, I don't stutter. It just seems like you can't read, or remember what you said: so, I repeated myself.
The fact that you still feel entitled to blame me, has degraded the world within which "I" have to live!
You've got a doctorate in obfuscation!
The issue is, you said to show you where you blamed anybody; and I showed you where you blamed me.
All the other stuff you wrote, I won't bother reading, until we deal with your blaming, controlling behavior, and begging.
It sounds real enough to get me into a hole; but, my only sources of information has been unreliable in the past; and the Trump Administration gave me advice that would have the best chance of getting me killed yesterday...
Right now, I'm questioning everything I thought I knew about how our world works...
A person can beg you to change your life to accommodate them...
Or as we've seen today, a person can blame you to accomplish the same goal.
As in telling someone we need to change our life, because we're making their life become less... or, just to make them happy
It seems good to recognize that blaming is an aggressive way of begging; and begging can be a less aggressive form of blaming.
They can also go together, as in...
If you don't feed me, I'll starve.
Please feed me, or I'll starve.
I hate you for starving me.
Or, Your attitude makes my life become less.
Blaming and begging go hand in hand.
This is something that I just learned today.
As far as I've considered it... Sometimes people can be hungry enough to beg; but a blamer being more aggressive by nature than a beggar, is also on the verge of robbery; and the best way to keep from emboldening a blamer to become a robber, is...
I use a mix of natural oils, that work as sunscreen on my skin and hair, and wash with 1 tablespoon of baking soda mixed in 2 cups of water.
I rinse with the same mix of apple cider vinegar and water.
Thanks for the heads up on my solar panels...
I'll have to try to come up with a plan to cover them quickly.
20 minutes isn't much time...
Oh yeah, the reason I got my dogs and myself out of my house, is because: judging by the pictures I've seen of nuclear blasts, I doubt it'd still be standing after getting nuked.
The other day I was in the park; and a young man approached me, and asked if he could share my pipe.
We were sitting, smoking, and talking: when his phone rang...
He started making excuses, while he was trying to invite her to help smoke my pot, without letting me know what he was doing...
Eventually he talked her into coming to where we were...
She walked up like a storm cloud.
She was standing over him, scowling at him.
He jumped up like he was her birch, to kiss her, and whisper in her ear...
By then, I was standing up, and grabbing my pipe out of his hand.
That's when she suddenly acted like she saw my puppy, and said, "How cute."
Then she said, "I just totally bought some weed," in a friendly voice that was loud, and meant for me...
I could tell she saw me watching when she walked up; and wanted me to stay long enough for her to convince me that he's an a**hole: and then we could vote on it, and put him in his place... and she had taken on a flirty tone to accomplish her goal.
I've been in his shoes so many times; and I didn't even slow down when she said, she bought weed.
I was walking away fast, and wasn't about to watch the wreck that was about to happen, let alone, participate in it.
I was wild in my younger days, and had more than my share of women, with all the trouble that implies...
I'm thinking that I'll be better off alone; and that's my plan.
I remember reading that people in Hiroshima and Nagasaki who were wearing light colored clothes had a better chance of living, as did the people who were behind low walls...
I chained my dogs behind fallen trees, in low ground, which is exactly the kind of place I hid.
That took most of the time I figured I had.
Nukes don't wait for dogs; and I took the risk of helping them stay out of range of a nuclear blast, before I hid in a place like them; but, you can always come across someone who'll find fault with what you do, even if you risk your life to do it.
I sleep with 3 ukes, a banjolele and a harmonica in my bed.
A uke was the easiest thing to grab on my way out the door.
I thought of that right away, and wondered how many people will die, when it's not a false alarm...
That combined with the fact their plan is, no plan, just make everyone stay in our houses, so the mess will be easier to clean up. . There's nothing more stressful about this situation, than realizing the advice they gave US, is likely to maximize the number of people who will die if we're nuked.
He just gave US a tax break, that doubled my property tax, eliminated the state property deduction, and more than doubled the cost of my dental insurance, but makes him billions of dollars.
I know he doesn't care about me; and, if his teeth ever catch on fire, I won't piss on them.
I only planned on staying in the hole, until the explosion was over, then getting my dogs (if we were still alive), and heading for the wilderness; because I know where to find spring water there.
My bug out bag is getting new attention... I can't believe I forgot a warm shirt, a blanket, or any food.
I kept wondering if my house and everything I left in it would be burned down in a half hour.
Hearing them say that people should remain in their houses, was scary!
I just wanted to get me and my dogs below the blast.
mykingdomforanam Forum Posts (3,244)
RE: Are you afraid of being hurt again?
There's been times when it hurt so bad, that I was on a suicidal, drug using, drunk; and when I showed up at her funeral, I didn't own a shirt or shoes, and hadn't bathed since the day before she was killed.Now I can almost see her eyes when I close mine; and I can feel her presence; and it comforts me.
It makes me cry when I ask myself this question; but, I wouldn't trade the little bit of time we shared, for anything on earth.
There's times when living in this world pains me, knowing that she was my once in a lifetime love: but when I remember the way she looked at me, and the love she gave me, I feel like we're still together in some quantum parallel universe.