You don't think society has a way of making a person feel guilty because they didn't "stick it out" or that you are leaving a non-abusive home for selfish reasons?
Justwhatitseems started a thread about why relationships fail...instead of hijacking his i'm starting this one along the same lines based on the replies there...
What someone wants (envisions) at 20 is not what they want at 30 is not what they want at 40....People grow, ideals change thoughts mature...and the best you can hope for is that your partner is going through the same growing process and that you are both still agreeing on how to accomplish and achieve your goals....
BUT....
What if you don't? What if your paths start taking different directions?...Do you stay in the relationship and allow one person to wither inside because their "needs" are not being met...thier aspirations will not be fulfilled?...Should one sacrifice to keep the peace?...to keep the family "whole"
What happens now?...and should they feel guilty because they want their "life" too??
What people want at 20 is not what they want at 30 is not what they want at 40...the most that you can hope for is that your partner aspires as you do and that it is still compatible...if its not..well...
Thanks TabooN....I was actually reading a book where this came up and that's how i came up with this question...
On my lowest days I do reminisce about my one time "what could have been"...and therefore I now deplete every avenue in a relationship before i walk away...so that i don't have the "what if's"...when i do walk away from something i don't look back...there's usually nothing left to look back onto...not always easy...but better in the long run...
I'm sorry to be the "odd" man out...but i don't particularly care for a "Canada" only forum...however i concede that it may be a great idea for those who are only looking for someone "close to home"
I myself feel priviledged to have been part of the International/US forums which not only gave me the opportunity to meet people i would not have otherwise met...but also share their values and opinions as seen from a "different" country....(I already know what the Canadians think...I want to hear what the rest of the world thinks!!)
It had a "segregated" feel to it...but again I will say for those that are only interested in "home grown" then yes this can be a great thing for them...
I have made too many wonderful new friends, especially in the States, for me to become once again exclusively Canadian...
Well i've not had this experience...mind you most of the people i chat with are people from right here on the forums...so even if they did bail...you would have seen it coming from their posts...
But i have known some who seems to have found what they were looking for and have decided to remove their profile...are you sure you were the only one she was speaking to?
Today my nephew left to go to University...he is studying Forensic Sciences...there was none of the wariness of facing the unknown of living on campus of starting a new chapter in his life...there was only excitement for his future...excitement to start this new life..and he reminded me that i was the one that taught him that many many years ago when life had not had the chance to tarnish my sense of adventure for living...
I looked at him and realized that perhaps its his youth that causes him to grasp his future with both hands...his inexperience with life to know hurt and devastation...but then i realized how wrong i was..just because i have many years on him and know what hurt and disappointment is does not mean that the circumstances in his life he has not seen as devastating...
He does mind if he fails at things...what satisfies him is that he tried...and will continue to try...
Where did we learn to give up...learn to accept...learn not to rock the boat...in essence where did we lose our courage to face our life??
Noticing alot of new people joining the site....and of course with the new European connection...that much more...but hey guys....STILL NO PICS...what gives????
Then choose your partners more carefully....decide what you want and what you don't want...what you are willing to deal with, and what you don't want to be a part of...before you get involved...its not all about a pretty face you know...
I'm sure she is just fine Paul...was asking the ages merely because of the situation...as you said...baby drama...to me different age groups handle the "ex's" differently...but that's just my opinion...
Should You Feel Guilty....???
You don't think society has a way of making a person feel guilty because they didn't "stick it out" or that you are leaving a non-abusive home for selfish reasons?