When Sorry Is Not Enough.
Sometimes we offend others by something we do or say. Often we realize it the moment it happens and other times we only realize it afterwards; sometimes too late.
If you like to hurt others and do it often then sorry becomes a hollow word that means nothing. You cannot expect your apology to be accepted if you are just going to do the same thing again. Sorry means: I won’t do it again.
However, if you spoke out of conviction when you offended and still think the same, there is no point in apologizing for it would not be sincere. You would be apologizing for the truth – perhaps only from your viewpoint – but still the truth.
If you apologize because you are threatened to do so, it is meaningless. You are just plain scared and not sorry at all.
But there are times when you are truly sorry about what you did and then a simple apology coming from the heart should be enough. When a simple sorry between friends is no longer enough, there is another problem.
Save your apologies for when you mean it. You don’t want a hollow sorry full of echoes when you really need it. Live your life in such way that you never have to say sorry and when you do have to; let your sorry mean sorry.
Have a whale of a day and try to go through it without having to say sorry.
Comments (48)
I would add that sometimes it is our action or inaction that causes the hurt just like not saying something when we should.
I also agree with Candy. "forgiving in advance"...where people wouldn´t need to apologize for their actions.
Have lovely day
Almost every time you mention a Norwegian word, I am surprised about the similarities in our languages. We have a similar word 'onskuld', probably pronounced almost the same as 'Unnskyld', which means innocence.
Forgiveness is so important. I still maintain that apologies and forgiveness need not be verbal between friends or lovers. The body language, which is seldom false, should convey this message. Seeing is better than hearing.
than to ask for permission
Absolutely. I want to see regret, not hear about it.
This is what annoys me about forcing two schoolboys to shake hands and say sorry after they were fighting. Neither are sorry at the time and they grow up with a misconception about apologizing. An apology must come freely and from the heart.
You mean something like, "Can I sit down?" after being seated.
When some people fantasies doesn't mach they're own reality of perceptions it can be disapointing 'remorsful experience' and that kind of remourse pointed towards me -yet has nothing to do with me. So yes,sorry is not always real meaningful sorry but it's good to forgive people ahead as we all have our own errors and adventiges that makes us imperfect humans learning and developing true errors made.It is interesting journey to see imperfect person perfectly
either I say sorry, and i mean it, or i dont give a dam! sometimes its better. nothing wrong to be/say sorry.
hope all is well with you !
One never has to feel guilty of forgiving. On the other hand, saying sorry when you don't mean it, is just a lie.
The worst is trying to apologize for something you said that is true but uncalled for. When you are sorry about saying something but not sorry about what you said.
Quite unlike a dog, a cat wags his tail when he is annoyed or about to attack.
I think I know exactly what you mean. Those who start the thing but then demands satisfaction when you retaliate in kind.
So say I too. Never be too proud to say sorry but let it really mean sorry when you say it. And when I don't have regrets, I'm not shy to say why not.
I can forgive anything once. The second time it is a bit harder and after the third time there is going to be a problem. I forgive but I don't forget.
These day's ( sorry )its just a word, without no meanings. I remember in the 80's the meaning of sorry was much much greater then today. Personaly if I'm wrong , I'll say it without any shame, but if I am right no way on this earth you can make me say sorry, even if that person is my mum.
E.John-B.Taupin
I guess it holds true for all languages with Germanic ties.
So true, and there is no disgrace in showing regret. In fact, it is admirable in a world where many people see it as losing face to apologize.
Yes, of course. The truth can hurt.
As a child they told me that "God" always forgive as long as you ask for it, this way i do sin all the time and then i ask for forgiveness, now it became a habbit and i do the same thing to people and ask for sorry. For example, look at Americans and Australians, they invated a country thye killed as many people as they resisted to them and more and 250 years later they say sorry.
Thank you for the blog Cat.
Forgive me if I am 'wrong' again but the way I have it, there are a few terms and conditions applying to God's forgiveness.
Without going to deep in the religion of it, I can recall that you are required to repent and be sorry about what you did.
And then I also recall that Jesus - when he trained his disciples - taught us that we will be forgiven according to how we forgive others.
Also, you have to accept Jesus as your personal savior.
So, to just ask forgives if these terms are not met is like wishes in the wind. And then He also very clearly states that there is one sin that He will never forgive.
But then, as I started off, I may be wrong.
I think it is the other meaning of sorry - to express sympathy - that makes it so easy to say it when we don't meant it. It is the most natural thing to say: "I'm sorry to hear that" when somebody told us about his woes; even if it does not affect us at all.
Actually my mother used the word very effectively as a threat as well. She only had do say: "I feel sorry for you when your father gets home tonight" and we behaved for the rest of the day.
Too true...some appologies are not sincere while others are from the heart but you cannot get past the wrong done...have a good day!! Cheers!
Yes, sorry about being caught is sorry for all the wrong reasons. Actually, there is no regret then; only fear about the consequences.
To hell with the victim, I'm going to jail.
Yes, you are right in that aspect but we are not talking such heavy stuff here. You are talking about people with a mission to disrupt while I talk about our everyday follies when hurting others due to being inconsiderate or sometimes just plain mean.
It can indicate
Regret: Sorry, I won't do it again.
Sympathy: I'm sorry to hear about your accident.
Politeness: Sorry, you are standing in my way.
Scorn: Sorry, I won't do that.
Condemnation: Your life is in a sorry state.