Welcome to the Blogs section. Below is a list of Blogs posted by members. A Blog is a journal you may enter about your life, thoughts, interesting experiences, or lessons you've learned. Post an opinion, impart words of wisdom, or talk about something interesting in your day. Update your blog on a regular basis, or just whenever you have something to say. Creating a blog is a good way to share something of yourself with others. Reading blogs is a good way to learn more about others. Click here to post a blog.
I honestly feel
well sense I am bad luck I think it would be cool to date a woman with the name karma
Karma, paybacks and the secret to happiness
Six years ago, I used to teach and do research at a major university here in New Jersey. I did that for a number of years and was vested there. Thus, I took a VERY early retirement and switched careers. I have a pension from the university, but am way too young to collect on it yet.
Anyway, while I was there I had a nice size lab and a couple of graduate (Ph.D.) students and usually one or two undergraduate students. Because my research was microbiology based, usually, the undergraduate students were biology majors.
However, while I was there I had one forestry major undergraduate. He was a gentle Ben, a huge guy. He stood about 6'7", full beard and usually wore jeans, boots and a flannel shirt. He kind of stood out in a microbiology building. The women who worked there were afraid of him. This was not only because of his imposing stature and his less than preppy attire. It was also because he cursed a lot. However, he always did a good job and was very respectful to me. Nonetheless, I often had to defend his presence there to the director of the department. This was heightened when he lost his dorm room. He had nowhere to stay.
Without actually suggesting, nor stating, that he could live in the microbiology building until the semester ended, I gave him a wink wink tour of the more secluded areas of the building. These were sort of secret places that I discovered, as places to get away from students and peacefully prepare grants, research papers, grade tests, etc.. I also let him see that there was a shower in the basement. Thus, unofficially, he moved into the building. This went OK for a couple of months until one of the secretaries stumbled upon him sleeping in a seldom used storage room one morning. This resulted in another meeting for me with the director of the department. Bottom line was, Ben had to move out with only one month left in the semester.
So, I knew from previous discussions that he didn't have much money and no family to depend upon. Thus, I "loaned' him the money to get an apartment, which he did. It got him through the semester and he graduated. That was 6 years ago. I have never heard from him since and had no idea what happened to Ben. I've moved 4 times in the past 6 years and no longer am affiliated with the university.
Yet, I just now got a phone call from Ben. Apparently, he was able to "finally" track me down using an online address site. He tried Google and that didn't work. After sharing some laughs about old times, he asked me if I remembered, that I loaned him some money. I said that I remember helping him get an apartment, but it was my pleasure to help him in a tough spot and that he didn't owe me anything. He said he was now in the military and doing fine and that he wants to mail me a check. I asked if he was sure he didn't need the money and he said that he doesn't and wants to do this. I said OK and gave him my address.
Karma and altruism are ironic. We often reap what we sow. Frequently, I accidently run into people I've worked with, played ball with, went to school with or met in other cicumstances.
A lot of times they remind me of things that I've done in the past that either caused them to laugh, inspired them, helped them, or just made them feel good. Ironicly, I guess its sort of selfish, because in reality it makes me feel good. While I am not religious at all, I do believe that we should leave this earth better than we found it and how we interact with our fellow earthlings is part of that legacy.
(continued below)
Anyway, while I was there I had a nice size lab and a couple of graduate (Ph.D.) students and usually one or two undergraduate students. Because my research was microbiology based, usually, the undergraduate students were biology majors.
However, while I was there I had one forestry major undergraduate. He was a gentle Ben, a huge guy. He stood about 6'7", full beard and usually wore jeans, boots and a flannel shirt. He kind of stood out in a microbiology building. The women who worked there were afraid of him. This was not only because of his imposing stature and his less than preppy attire. It was also because he cursed a lot. However, he always did a good job and was very respectful to me. Nonetheless, I often had to defend his presence there to the director of the department. This was heightened when he lost his dorm room. He had nowhere to stay.
Without actually suggesting, nor stating, that he could live in the microbiology building until the semester ended, I gave him a wink wink tour of the more secluded areas of the building. These were sort of secret places that I discovered, as places to get away from students and peacefully prepare grants, research papers, grade tests, etc.. I also let him see that there was a shower in the basement. Thus, unofficially, he moved into the building. This went OK for a couple of months until one of the secretaries stumbled upon him sleeping in a seldom used storage room one morning. This resulted in another meeting for me with the director of the department. Bottom line was, Ben had to move out with only one month left in the semester.
So, I knew from previous discussions that he didn't have much money and no family to depend upon. Thus, I "loaned' him the money to get an apartment, which he did. It got him through the semester and he graduated. That was 6 years ago. I have never heard from him since and had no idea what happened to Ben. I've moved 4 times in the past 6 years and no longer am affiliated with the university.
Yet, I just now got a phone call from Ben. Apparently, he was able to "finally" track me down using an online address site. He tried Google and that didn't work. After sharing some laughs about old times, he asked me if I remembered, that I loaned him some money. I said that I remember helping him get an apartment, but it was my pleasure to help him in a tough spot and that he didn't owe me anything. He said he was now in the military and doing fine and that he wants to mail me a check. I asked if he was sure he didn't need the money and he said that he doesn't and wants to do this. I said OK and gave him my address.
Karma and altruism are ironic. We often reap what we sow. Frequently, I accidently run into people I've worked with, played ball with, went to school with or met in other cicumstances.
A lot of times they remind me of things that I've done in the past that either caused them to laugh, inspired them, helped them, or just made them feel good. Ironicly, I guess its sort of selfish, because in reality it makes me feel good. While I am not religious at all, I do believe that we should leave this earth better than we found it and how we interact with our fellow earthlings is part of that legacy.
(continued below)
ANY ONE JUST FOR FUN
There is nothing like trying to find a partner to have fun with, its trying to find someone to have a threesome with now thats hard.
any takers ? we are both 24 look at our pics !
any takers ? we are both 24 look at our pics !
Freedom to Speak Freedom to Choice
Wordsjust doesn´t provoke and doesn´t insult anybody,but the way we speak does.I don´t speak and I don´t like who talks such mode.I have no prejudices and I don´t do judge of value,I like to share ideas about everything,to learn more each day.I just can´t bear taboo and plastic people. I love Free Thinking.
friendship....
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.A best friend is the one who'll be staying beside you saying'Damn that was fun!
Rain
Fark this rain is so stupid im sick of it eh, no muay thai today lol no fun nothing. what should we do? any suggestions?
New dream
I can't get you out of this mind that I'm in
Can't chase away thoughts of touching your skin
Of kissing your lips and stroking your hair
Of laying with you and breathing your air.
Don't take me from this paradise, don't wake me form this dream,
Waking life without you is enough to make one scream.
Save me from a nightmare in which you don't exist,
Let me keep on dreaming and forget about the rest.
Can't chase away thoughts of touching your skin
Of kissing your lips and stroking your hair
Of laying with you and breathing your air.
Don't take me from this paradise, don't wake me form this dream,
Waking life without you is enough to make one scream.
Save me from a nightmare in which you don't exist,
Let me keep on dreaming and forget about the rest.
LONELY
WOW SO MY FRIEND CALLED ME A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO AND I COULDN'T WAIT TO GET OFF THE PHONE. I MEAN I LOVE HER TO DEATH BUT WHEN WE GOT OFF THE PHONE I REALIZE HOW I RARELY EVEN CARRY ON A REGULAR CONVERSATION WITH ANYONE ANYMORE. I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A PEOPLE PERSON AND DONT GET ME WRONG I STILL LOVE BEING AROUND PEOPLE BUT IT SEEMS LIKE I KEEP WANTING TO BE BY MYSELF MORE AND MORE AS THE TIME PASSES. I HAVE GOTTEN SO USED TO BEING SO BUSY AT WORK THAT I RARELY HAVE TIME TO TALK TO ANYONE, THEN GOING HOME TO MY APARTMENT (TO MY PUPPY) AND JUST WATCHING A MOVIE OR CLEANING. WHICH LET ME TELL YA DOESN'T LEAVE MUCH ROOM FOR CONVERSATION. NOT THAT I MIND IT MOST OF THE TIME. I HAVE TWO JOBS SO ALOT OF MY TIME IS SPENT WORKING AROUND PEOPLE BUT WHY IS IT THAT NOW WHENEVER I HAVE SOME OFF TIME I CANT WAIT TO BE BY MYSELF. IS THIS NORMAL? IS IT NORMAL TO GO THROUGH PERIODS OF YOUR LIFE WHEN ALL YOU WANT IS TO BE LEFT ALONE. I USED TO TALK ON MY PHONE ALL THE TIME NOW I FIND MYSELF HITTING THE SILENT BUTTON SO I DONT HAVE TO MISS A PART OF MY MOVIE. THIS IS SUCH A WEIRD REALIZATION ABOUT MYSELF THAT I COULD REALLY USE SOME ADVICE OR EVEN ENCOURAGEMENT...I REALLY DONT KNOW WHAT I WANT FROM THIS. I JUST WANTED TO GET IT OUT. SO NOW IT IS! WHEW!!!!
"In appreciation..".
"I've had this on my mind for some time but,only recently
felt the need to express what I've been feeling.I just wanted
to say that I do appreciate all of those people who have come
and gone in my life;friends,family and the unknown.
I have been feeling very sad lately because I see so many
people hurting eachother for no apparent reason and,it hurts
me to see this.I'm a caring person,a person with a big heart,
one who would do anything to make all the hurt and pain go away.
I guess what I'm trying to say is,I've been through a lot in
my life and I know how it feels to be hurt or in pain...emotionally."
"It's gonna be okay,it's gonna be okay.
Just take life by the horns and ride
on through for you are a strong,
courageous being...never give up the
fight."
felt the need to express what I've been feeling.I just wanted
to say that I do appreciate all of those people who have come
and gone in my life;friends,family and the unknown.
I have been feeling very sad lately because I see so many
people hurting eachother for no apparent reason and,it hurts
me to see this.I'm a caring person,a person with a big heart,
one who would do anything to make all the hurt and pain go away.
I guess what I'm trying to say is,I've been through a lot in
my life and I know how it feels to be hurt or in pain...emotionally."
"It's gonna be okay,it's gonna be okay.
Just take life by the horns and ride
on through for you are a strong,
courageous being...never give up the
fight."
The Pros and Cons of Online Dating Part I
Before I begin, let me just say that this is completely my opinion. Secondly, I'm trying to humorous so please don't take my statements at face value and conclude that I am a bitter, broken, and cantankerous old man.
Numbers
Pro: With online dating you have the opportunity to "meet" hundreds of women in a relatively short amount of time.
Con: With online dating have the opportunity to be rejected by hundreds of women in a relatively short amount of time.
Analysis: Since I began dating online in late January, I have probably messaged over 200 women. That's netted me one official date in the real world which lead to one offical "friendly" boot. All told, I don't think that's too bad. Especially, since I've applied for over 300 jobs online (trying to make a career change) and only received 4 rejection e-mails and 2 interviews (which turned out to be partly scammy with a chance of fraud).
The reality of the situation is that it is very easy to send a lady who catches your fancy a short e-mail. It is infinitely harder to walk up to a real life woman and do the same thing.
Feedback
Pro: Rejection is less personal and less embarrassing.
Con: Rejection could be 3 - 4 weeks in the making.
Analysis: I touched on this in a previous post (There's No Joy in Limbo Town); however, it would be prudent to mention it again. In the real world, it's excrutiating to build up the courage to talk to someone and step onto the precipice of rejection just to be lightly pushed off the edge by the object of your desire. Sure, by subscribing to the "Behaviors of the Alpha Male" website I can learn to be a smooth talking Don Juan, but do I really want to invest my hard earned cash just to hear someone tell me to "Man up, smile, and remember that you eat rejection for breakfast!"
On the flip side, it's the anticipation that can get to you. You send your message wondering if they will respond and when they don't you have no idea why. So all you can do is question your actions. After a while, you get used to it so you don't worry about it so much, but it eventually starts to erode your self-confidence.
Pro: You might come across much better in writing/person.
Con: You might come across much better in person/writimg.
Analysis: However well you may write, eventually you are going to have to actually meet the person. Conversely, you might be extremely charismatic in person, but you can't write to save your life.
I'm the type of person that comes across better in person. I use expressive body language and voice inflection. What I try to do is live up to my online persona. I try to be outgoing and extroverted online (more so than I am in real life). For example, if I were at a club and I saw a beautiful woman, I would simply admire her from a far. I wouldn't have the guts to go up to her in person. Online though, that beautiful woman is just a pixelated, 2 dimensional character. Who cares if she rejects me?
On the other hand, let's say I do build up the courage to talk to the woman. Now, I'm getting instant feedback. I can look at her body language. I can adjust my tone and volume. I can make eye contact. All these things are exciting to me and whether I'm sucessful or not I have a lot of fun flirting. Online flirting is definitely not as fun because you don't have that instantaneous feedback nor do you get the electric thrill of a woman grabbing your hand or playfully bumping your leg with her foot.
END PART I
THAT IS ALL
Numbers
Pro: With online dating you have the opportunity to "meet" hundreds of women in a relatively short amount of time.
Con: With online dating have the opportunity to be rejected by hundreds of women in a relatively short amount of time.
Analysis: Since I began dating online in late January, I have probably messaged over 200 women. That's netted me one official date in the real world which lead to one offical "friendly" boot. All told, I don't think that's too bad. Especially, since I've applied for over 300 jobs online (trying to make a career change) and only received 4 rejection e-mails and 2 interviews (which turned out to be partly scammy with a chance of fraud).
The reality of the situation is that it is very easy to send a lady who catches your fancy a short e-mail. It is infinitely harder to walk up to a real life woman and do the same thing.
Feedback
Pro: Rejection is less personal and less embarrassing.
Con: Rejection could be 3 - 4 weeks in the making.
Analysis: I touched on this in a previous post (There's No Joy in Limbo Town); however, it would be prudent to mention it again. In the real world, it's excrutiating to build up the courage to talk to someone and step onto the precipice of rejection just to be lightly pushed off the edge by the object of your desire. Sure, by subscribing to the "Behaviors of the Alpha Male" website I can learn to be a smooth talking Don Juan, but do I really want to invest my hard earned cash just to hear someone tell me to "Man up, smile, and remember that you eat rejection for breakfast!"
On the flip side, it's the anticipation that can get to you. You send your message wondering if they will respond and when they don't you have no idea why. So all you can do is question your actions. After a while, you get used to it so you don't worry about it so much, but it eventually starts to erode your self-confidence.
Pro: You might come across much better in writing/person.
Con: You might come across much better in person/writimg.
Analysis: However well you may write, eventually you are going to have to actually meet the person. Conversely, you might be extremely charismatic in person, but you can't write to save your life.
I'm the type of person that comes across better in person. I use expressive body language and voice inflection. What I try to do is live up to my online persona. I try to be outgoing and extroverted online (more so than I am in real life). For example, if I were at a club and I saw a beautiful woman, I would simply admire her from a far. I wouldn't have the guts to go up to her in person. Online though, that beautiful woman is just a pixelated, 2 dimensional character. Who cares if she rejects me?
On the other hand, let's say I do build up the courage to talk to the woman. Now, I'm getting instant feedback. I can look at her body language. I can adjust my tone and volume. I can make eye contact. All these things are exciting to me and whether I'm sucessful or not I have a lot of fun flirting. Online flirting is definitely not as fun because you don't have that instantaneous feedback nor do you get the electric thrill of a woman grabbing your hand or playfully bumping your leg with her foot.
END PART I
THAT IS ALL
A Blog is a journal you may enter about your life, your thoughts, interesting experiences, or lessons you have learned. It's your own page on Connecting Singles that you can update on a regular basis, or just whenever you have something to say. You can write about an opinion, impart words of wisdom, or talk about something interesting in your day. Creating a blog is a good way to share something of yourself with Connecting Singles members. Reading blogs is a good way to learn more about members you have met here. Please be sure to read the blog rules before posting.
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