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Love is like a virus
It comes unexpectantly
Infecting your lungs
Destroying life as it is known
Forcing you to choose
Life or death
Love or hate
Casket of lonely darkness
Or cradle of new life

tears on a pillow the crying game those floods of emotions you cannot tame.

for all you had for all you lost the agonies raw still counting the cost

A slight release of the deeper you in weeping in silence you feel you must do

don't let it rule each day and night or lose the focus or lose the fight

the pillow your comfort an imaginary friend you come to rely you come to depend

grief and darkness that plays on your mind looking for answers and reasons to find

doubting your doubt fearing your fear a tangled web fogged and unclear

those watery ducts in the eyes full aflow never seeming to stop unrelenting to slow

the hours upon hours of lowly sadness reaching the brink almost touching the madness

fooled by fools self punished alone these tears on your pillow you hope will atone

and ease your concience that you know to be right to let in warmth let in light

more musings we alllike agood cry sometimes

Happy Friday every one , T.G.I.F.

Learn to appreciate the rainbow after cursing the rain.It's just like loving again after experiencing the pain!

Nothing can describe, the way I feel for you
Your love is warm and precious
Your heart so pure and true
Heavens angels brought me
To knock upon your door
To give you all my love
To keep you wanting more
The special bond we share, will guide us on our way
To a perfect life were dreams come true
What more can I really say
We were brought together, never will we part
Your my special gift
Your my shining star
I'll love you unconditionally
With all my heart and soul
I'll never break your spirit
I'll always keep you whole

Every day I take each step
On this rough road alone
Thinking of that moment
When you and I first met in a junction
The flowers were in full bloom
And robins were singing
You swept my feet off the ground
And in an instant I seemed floating.

We talked for few minutes
And took steps to farther our walk
While exchanging pleasantries
And cracking each other jokes
Time passed so fast that we never noticed
We're on another junction
Each has to bid the other "so long"
And took paths of different directions.

I have moved farther
And that junction now out of sight

Please my angel of love, be the wings through which I am excluded from the untouched perils of this world.
Lead me onto the uncommonly serene pavement, where all hatred and reality is exiled.
Tell me you're there when I need you, hold me in your arms when I'm with you, and with the gentle stroke of your wonderous fingers touch my lips.
Hold me until my fear subsides, and the darkness has drifted off

its late..at least for me.. after midnight..hard to go to sleep.. harder yet.. to know ..its over..no longer will we have contact.. write..talk..see each other..no more wonderfull weekends.. yes ..i know there were only two...i had plans for many more..a spring and summer full..and then even more..


the emptiness that comes with
loss..
its hard to fill
leaves a void.. to deep to bridge..
time had started to heal ..to mend the abyss..

i thought i had healed enough to join the fray
to withstand the assult
on selfesteem.. selfdoubt..selfconfidence.
i find i still am a fragile vessel.. to easy
to damage..to quick to emerge..

memories..
they serve you well
or
do they??
are they just our minds manupulations of
past events,
that we arrange to please ourselves??

or

are they time and space
frozen.
set aside for us to view again.
to fill a void ...heal a wound.
a place to find happiness lost.
memories of pleasure and good times,
found once a time ago...
lost in the past.
now only in ....
memories...

Revelation 2:2 I know you cannot tolerate wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and found them false.

Revelation 2:4 Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen!!!! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you you do not repent I will come to you and remove the lampstand from it's place.

Testing men and women apart from Christ with insane methods are just total nonsense. I read these verses about the first two years seeking the Lord seriously and they have stuck with me for the 6 years in the Lord. Jesus said you can't put up with those wicked cons those dudes and women who chase your pocket instead of your heart.

I've had people harass me testing me I guess I would fail on purpose whatever they where doing just to prove a point, testing me apart from God your the evil one not me. Say I didn't like something John Hagge said and I go harass him to disprove him lol. Who is in the wrong here?? me or Hagge. ((((ME)))) Because I have taken it in my hands instead of the Lords given a man a hard time and wasting my and his time.

So what in the heck do I do?? hmmmm ? of the day you may say hmmmm I wonder. Don't want to be ripped off and I don't want to be lead wrong and it's good to be in good connect with Christ so hmmmm.
Jesus said it in a nut shell, (((return))) to your first love I the Lord not man.

Think about it long and hard. When a man is abiding in the Lord, what do you get from his message, song, or whatever he is doing?? You get your first love, its that darn simple. When he is not you get the man a dry word that leaves you sleeping or annoyed or even ticked off<<<lve been there lol. Without the Spirit in a service, devotion, sermon, it tends to be boring, annoying, or just plain out man your point??

Return to your first love the Lord Jesus. To focus on men apart from Him you'll be beat up and full of doubt in your faith. I stand on my own faith in Christ not others<<< apply that. The Lord wants people focused on Him and His salvation plans for man, not in the conduct of men, Focus on Jesus not men.
God Sense 101