Loving one's self
I just had a thought while driving in the car today.I am currently chatting with and in the process of setting up a date with an ex-private dancer. I was asked, what do you like about me? After finding out she is just about done with her college to become a veterinary assistant, I told her that I liked that she was doing something in her life to make herself proud and to love herself.
This got me thinking. I have heard so many times how women can never be happy or you can never please a woman. Lets say a woman is in a relationship with you and she cooks, cleans, pleases you in the sack....etc....what does she really have to be happy with? Yes, some women are happy in relationships like this but some others are not.
It is thought that happiness comes from within. Maybe these women that are thought to of being difficult to please or difficult to make happy, feel they have not accomplished much in life for themselves? Of course, this could go for a man also.
Moral of the story....try to avoid getting into a relationship unless you genuinely feel love or liking for yourself. In addition, a person looking to get into a relationship with another should determine if that person is genuinely happy with themselves.
Just a random thought I had today.
Accept negative outcomes in your life....learn from them....appreciate what you have....and build on that. :)
Comments (73)
Private dancer
At first I think this blog about the m**turbation.
This thought really got me thinking of how people are "people pleasers." They try to please others to get favorable judgment from them. Say for example, a trophy wife. She only stays or is beautiful because she is trying to appeal and please men. I have heard and seen so many of these types of women not genuinely happy. I think until anyone, man or woman, for them to be truly happy they need to accomplish something in their lives to make them believe, know, and feel they are happy. And, if both people in a relationship are not truly happy/loving themselves, it could lead to a toxic relationship.
Like I said initially, this is just a random thought.
I could be wrong but would like others' opinions.
I wanna be a private dancer too......
I haven't been on a date in 25 years. But, we are kicking around the idea of bowling. ...only bowled like twice in my life.
But last chance of happiness....hardly. I do not even know this girl and not to mention there are a lot of red flags flying over head.
We cannot rely on another for our happiness.. It should come from within. Our husband/ wife ect should bring out all our good qualities and enhance our joy... But not be wholly responsible for it.
You are such a good guy Johnny... Good luck on your date . Hope things work out for you ... She'd sounds a lovely woman
j/k
The reason why I mentioned the private dancer thing is because she was living a life of pleasing other people. Now, she was smart enough, to change direction in her life to do something that made her proud of herself.
You have generous ways about you, Johnny boy!
You are so right. I think that played a huge role in the downturn of my previous 13 year relationship.
Even though the relationship was going well, there was that deep underlying feeling of unhappiness....I think for both of us. I could not really put my finger on it until I had this thought today.
Thank you for your post.
If anything, I can say I went on a date in the last 25 years.
I am still a rookie in the dating world. ....but, kinda exciting I think. :)
But first, boy never dated in 25 years? May I ask why? If you don't mind. I find it so hard to believe for a man to be out of date that long. Just curious. Your story might serve as a very good specimen for so many reasons.
The other thing is are you happy Johnny? 25 years of no date and why now?
Anyways, your mind on the happiness originating from yourself is great. I personally feel, it is our responsibility to make ourselves happy. But there are so many sources of happiness. For instance in my case, my children, grand children, my career, health, my food, and my being able to wake up every morning and my memory intact. My reading all these blogs and interaction amongst all of us is a great source of my happiness. Of course there are things that make me unhappy once in a while but bottom line, after having survived two cancers, there is nothing really that can make me unhappy. At best I am always positive even if things are rather challenging. I have a man that loves me more than I can ever ask and I am happy.
But I wish you all happiness Johnny and may your first date be a success.
Take care.
And you still going on a date?
Yeah, my ex-gf and I went on dates.....but....not on dates with strangers. lol
Well! Either way. Just treat her like a lady!...
I hope she become your private dancer
Jazz....I am on another site also.
Bun....maybe, but only time will tell. I hope she is so much more than that though. One of my past mistakes was not understanding what was upstairs and how that could effect a relationship.
.............
POF.
As In: Pleasing The People?.....
No Pepps.....Plenty of Fish....but pof.com
You are absolutely right....gotta go out and venture. :)
I know That, I was speaking in the Morris Code...
BTW Pepps, there will be no date.
Good thing I asked to exchange phone numbers. Lets put it this way, I didn't like what I found out with her number.
What the secret?
With getting older comes independence in a lot of ways. I changed the things in my life I don't like and I'm overall happy. I had tough times and I'm glad they are over, but being positive and going forward helps.
I had good relationships in the past with guys where we genuinely loved and enjoyed each others company and that is the only relationship I will be getting into again.