Still Waiting For The Right One?
Then I have bad news for you. He or she may never come. That person does not exist and is not likely to be born in the next millennium. He or she is only a figment of your imagination.
Even if you should be lucky enough to find that 100% partner, there is nothing to say that you will meet the requirements of your target. Chances are that you may be totally unacceptable to that person.
You cannot look for your other half with preconceptions. Humans are not like new cars that you can have custom built. They are more like used cars. When you buy a used car, you have to look at what is available and make do with what closest to your requirements. If you wanted a tinted windscreen and there is none available, look for other extras.
You may find a job with an above average sound system to compensate. It is more important that the car is large enough for your needs and that the mechanics are in a good condition.
Like with any used car, you may have to put up with a few scratches and dents here and there. Maybe even a rattle or two. Oh yes, do have a look in the trunk. You are bound to find some old baggage there. These are things that can be fixed with time.
However, don't attempt larger modifications. If you wanted a sun roof, think carefully before you decide to fit one yourself. You may end up with a water leak when it rains or when you have your car washed.
And most of all, don't make unnecessary cosmetic changes. Bigger wheels will put strain on the diff and change the gearbox ratio on top of it.
There is no need to lower your standards. You only need to settle for something different that is of the same quality.
And remember to service your car regularly.
Comments (99)
A virtual friend? Will there be a need for something like that when you have the right partner.
Yes, we all want more.
I want (and I think that is what we all want)
An angel when I wake up.
- Kiss an angel good morning.
A lady through the day.
- The lady is mine.
And a bìtch at night.
- Help me make it through the night.
But is this not the goddess that you referred to?
The bottom line is that we should not expect miracles. Nobody can please a partner in every way.
Mate, if you have trousers, why wait?
In the cinema?
It better be a very good movie or the two of you will be the movie.
reading some of the orders men posting on their profiles, reminded me very much of a fashion catalogue
i.e....: " hmm that one has the right size and nice top coming with it!! And yeah the back isn't too bad either , right all boxes ticked, better send off the order before noon so I'll get delivered next day!!"
Even myself, who (I have to admit )can be very vain and self indulgent at times...
Would prefer a decent guy with his heart at the right place.
I personally do not believe in the perfect match or the hotter the fella the better things would be...
well I'm still a puppy to the dating community!!!
But like on Facebook we all try to sell ourselves .... One more, the other less.
...a used car has at least character and with enough TLC and commitment flaws can be embraced and even mended....
But, I fear I have developed some strange habbits so far..
Living and loving need not to be complicated. If you are flexible enough it can even be a party all year. But I guess it is human nature to complicate things.
Don't we all have them? But when you're in love you don't have the time for old habits, You unlearn them very quickly.
The bottom line is that we should not expect miracles. Nobody can please a partner in every way.
Nope. I am referring to the Puppet Masters of my acquaintance (particularly women in Poland but also girls in High School back in Canada) who seemed to think no words would be needed when Prince Charming arrived. [The chances of such a Prince arriving lessen as one ages.] He would act and speak exactly perfect, like a puppet but one without so much as an honest word of guidance from the puppet master.
This is not the same as a puzzle-piece fit, of course. Fit requires no manipulation, overt or covert.
I am pretty easy to please so I cannot say about pleasing someone in every way but it makes sense to me. I keep my expectations of others to a low maintenance level. My needs that would substantiate a “partnership” do have a prioritisation and hangers on simply won’t make that cut. I want a marriage that allows the two complete people in it, with the same personal goal, to grow and self-actualize. I want both of us to find happiness in becoming the person we wish to be, and sharing this knowledge with the other as a process of learning and, also, as a process of intimacy building. But that’s me, and the rest of my periphery is fairly an untidy place outside of my passionate focus.
This mirrors my current surroundings: books piled around me in various states of reading, paper everywhere on my desk without any seeming order, a chair for clothes, lots of dust and dust motes; forgotten cold coffee on a coaster, multi-coloured highlighters, pens and a pencil, binders stacked atop one another on a corner table, a chair that cries out for upholstery, etc., etc. I need a cleaning servant for the periphery, but not a partner. She should share the focus not be the focus or be upset with the periphery – and me her likewise.
Ok, I see what you're getting at.
And we could be brothers. My pad looks the same. Only add a few computer expansion cards into the Fray. I call it organized chaos.
You mentioned another valid point.
Although modern scholars doubt it if Shakespeare ever said it, he is widely believed to have said: "Expectation is the root of all heartache."
By the same definition you can reduce the heartache if the reality does not match up to the expectation by lowering the expectations in the first instance.
~ You attract what you Are!!! & Not what you Want!!!
I recall reading it was Adam, the first man, who said that.
Thank you.
All that remains now is for me to practice what I preach.
Yes, sneaking around the deserted corridors of CS like illegal immigrants.
Maybe recorded in some lost scriptures but it is not in the modern bible. At least not in the translations in my possession.
I think it was in the Apocryphal.
If life were like the movies, we'd never be blue.
I did a phrase search as well as the words 'expectation' and 'heartache'. No go. It is possible though that it was worded differently. Somehow, I cannot recall something like that. But being of Protestant upbringing, I'm not that sharp on those books.
Probably zombies, yes.
Vegetarians? Is that a religion? Or maybe a club?
Anyway, I have to go out for about 20 minutes. I'll be back soon.
Coincidence or fate?
I have an doctor's appointment for the same date.
You must follow your feelings.
Hope you are okay though
yep, I'm ok. I have to see my quack every four weeks. I just saw him on the 1st for my big checkup. Thankfully that is only every twenty-four weeks.
I did a phrase search as well as the words 'expectation' and 'heartache'. No go. It is possible though that it was worded differently. Somehow, I cannot recall something like that. But being of Protestant upbringing, I'm not that sharp on those books.
If memory serves me it’s a revelation in the last book in The Set of 67: The Apocryphal of John. I got the fancy faux-leather Bible free from Time-Life Books when I ordered The Gunfighters series back in the ‘80s. I am sure the quote is in there. Somewhere….
Check under Apocryphal in the Google oracle. I am sure yu'll find it.
Since we last spoke I ran a full search and came up with nothing, but as I said, they may have used different wording. I will run through a few other translations through the course of evening.
I'd love to find a non-Shakespeare source of it because there appears to be no evidence that he ever uttered or penned those words.
Hope you'll get it sorted. I have to wait until the middle of May.