Why Do We Fall In Love?
No matter how many times we resolve not to fall in love, we just do it again and again; time after time. And every time it is better than the previous time.
But the weirdest of all is that it is almost always a stranger. We seldom fall in love with somebody we know. Let’s face it, we don’t look into the face of a well known person and suddenly go weak in the knees. That is a stranger that does that to you.
If you don’t want to fall in love, avoid meeting or seeing strangers. But then there is probably a built in cut out switch somewhere to allow you to fall in love with a known person in the absence of strangers.
John and Mary will know each other for years and may be a perfect match but they will not fall in love with each other. However, it can happen that they may come to their senses and decide to throw their lot together. Given a bit of time they will grow to love each other and spend a lifetime in happiness but that was not falling in love. It is a cultivated love brought about by a logic decision and probably has the best chance of success.
So then why do we fall in love?
I think falling in love is a primitive breeding instinct to ensure the survival of the human species. And it is built into our genes to fall in love with a stranger to diversify our genetic material. Inbreeding had never been good for any genetic pool.
Have a great day and avoid strangers.
Comments (77)
after knew him better, I didn't call him stranger anymore, but I called him " Honeeeyy..... "
even though still I feel something strange.... falling in love is amazing..
So there you are. From a stranger total stranger to a friend and quickly you feel as if you have known him all your life.
I dod not understand what yiu are trying to tell me. Can you try to rephrase it please?
Sometimes?
The heart NEVER knows reason.
Fotinia: " I'm sorry you did not tell me where here breed?..."
?
Maybe I forgot to take my 'clever' medication this morning but I do not have the foggiest idea what you are talking about. I will keep looking at it and maybe eventually the penny will drop.
Many our actions - in my opinion - are controlled by our genes and as such we have very little control over it. Society may have given us a smooth layer of varnish but when alone that layer comes off very easily. We wppear to be able to convert to animal and back in no time at all
Yes indeed. But in the end you fall in love with the stranger and not the car. The car's only purpose is to make him more noticeable.
We have a very nice word for a smart car here in SA but I'm definitely not going to quote it here.
Love is a fatal attraction and when the right two people get together even the walls of Carthage must fall. We may offer some initial resistance and sometimes we are able to ward the assault off; especially when it is a one-sided affection but the feeling shall soon return.
It's for a wandering soul needs its love harbor to stay...
Initially it is better than anything before. It removes the sadness and remorse from a previous relationship gone wrong. It is as if love is modular. The entire previous relationship is replaced in memory with the new specifications and if it is fulfilled - even for a short while - the pain of a previous relationship gone wrong, is permanently nullified.
If the new relationship is terminated earlier than expected, the old one, even if it was more intense and longer in duration, will not shift back in place. You will have a new heartache. The old one will be forgotten.
I have a sailing (wandering) soul. Do you gave a safe harbor?
But for those who does, Good Luck to you!
I think you struck the right chord there. Get the brain and heart and equal chance. The must be some reasoning in falling in love.
I fear wishing you luck is not going to work here. Making a relationship work takes a lot of hard work from two sides. Happiness does not come by itself. You have to work on it; earn it so to speak.
We never look for love. It comes to us. You cannot hunt love like an animal. It is more like fishing or setting a trap; using yourself as bait. The problem is you never know beforehand what you will catch and you may get eaten in the process. A clever fish can take the bait off the hook without being caught.
A crush is just a mild form of being in love. Remember falling in love is not love at all though it may eventually lead to it. Being in love is just a temporary physical attraction that wears off. Ask any happily married couple. At some stage the honeymoon comes to an end. And the the relationship needs something more substantial to lean on.
Yes, Cat, and a lot of forgiving and so on and so on..Falling in love is easy, at least for me, but maintaining the love you have so fell for, is a loooooot of work Cat. Indeed..
Love is not about forgiving and having to say sorry all the time. When that is the case there is something drastically wrong. When love is in place properly, the impact (on your partner) of every action should be considered beforehand; apologies and forgivings should not be part of the equation at all.
My dreaming time now.
Enjoy your time .
90% chance of a successful failure, if think. More likely a guaranteed failure
No one is perfect - I can look past something annoying in a person if I'm wearing "pink glasses" but I am aware of all my friends and aquantainces "faults" or simply all things that would drive me bonkers if they were my partner.
I do like to take my time to get to know someone but it has happended that when I got to know someone beforehand too well (meaning I discovered some serious downside in their character), I wasn't interested in them anymore romantically. Saved me some headaches btw.
Just remember there is a heavy penalty for late delivery.
That is just going to cost you an extra meal and movie ticket. It is when they start sleeping over for more than one night in a row that you must call your lawyer.
Tell me some more about these infatuations.
Is it not just being mildly in love.
Hmm, it is too funny all the problems we can encounter with a lover.
Other than my health I had a few problems in my life. Twice I was arrested (with a few friends) for being drunk and disorderly when I was a student but ALL my other problems were related to a lover somehow. And yet I come back for more every time. I must really love women.
It sure does but I prefer to study the menu in the street and to eat at home. It avoids food poisoning.
Not wanting to be technical but being in love is not love at all. It is a temporary infatuation with somebody.
@Cat...does this mean women past child bearing age are unable to fall in love....
Not quite, but it could normally be included. As I said in the blog; a primitive breeding instinct that we normally suppress.
That is the problem; the no recovery clause.