Most Commented Animals Blogs (472)

I have had a few anomalies and weird things happening in my house and gardens recently.

A few were:

Huge piles of dirty laundry discovered each day.

The sink full of unwashed dishes and pans

Strange smell coming from my attic, I don’t have an attic that I know of.

Small disposable nappies all over the garden, and so much more.

Setting up a CCTV system I reviewed the footage taken the next day, the results shocked me.

The dirty laundry and dishes were put there by me! I must be sleep trashing the house.

The cats were turning on the heating, they also seemed to be running a whore house, a stream of Toms came through the window, and the females were all dressed in hotpants and boob tubes.

The Chicken was acting as the boss; she was wearing nappies so that her shite all over the floor didn’t give the game away.

I also saw a huge amount of what must be slave cats, the under stair cupboard had been turned into a chop shop, stolen wheelbarrows were being cut up for scrap.

Am I the only person to have discovered the secret world of cats and a chicken that thinks it’s a pimp?

Pity that lion was wounded.






Fantastic





Foreigners like to get a 'rush' of adrenalin from things they know nothing about. I have no sympathy for these types.

I should learn to keep my trap shut but there are things that can annoy me so much that I have to speak. A dog on a chain is one of those things.

Ever since I moved here – while taking my morning walk - I have been noticing this dog in the front yard a few blocks down the road. I don’t know the English name of the breed but in my language we call it a skaaphond which translates to a sheep dog. I suspect it may be of English origins. It is a black and white dog with hair of medium length. We keep them on our sheep farms as they are very good with sheep.

I would not really have bothered as it not a spectacular dog. It was well fed with water within his reach and enough shade. But it was tied to a stake in the ground by means of a 2-meter chain.

This morning, for the first time, I saw the owner in the garden. I introduced myself and we shook hands in true South African style.

“Nice dog”, I commented.

Yes”, he replied. “A well tended dog”.

“You mean a well fed dog”, I said. It slipped out before I could catch it.

“So what is the difference?” he asked. I did not fail to notice the annoyance in his eyes.

“He’s on a chain”, I said.

“Yes, so he is. Otherwise he ruins my garden”, he replied, now clearly irritated.

“That is easy to explain”, I said. “These dogs need plenty of space. He belongs on a farm”.

“Why don’t you mind your own business”, he exploded.

Well, he was right, it was none of my business, and I proceeded with my walk. I normally come back up the next street but my inquisitiveness forced be back the same way and when I passed the house he pretended not to notice me while attaching a steel ring to a tree.

Can it be that he plans to put the dog on a cable? I surely hope so. It will not satisfy me but it will certainly make me happier.


Have a good day out there and let sleeping dogs lie.

Long time readers will recall that last winter and through this fall I had something killing and eating deer in my forest.

Although I had suspicions I never did find out for sure what it was. It all stopped around the time human hunting season began and I put it out my mind. The only clue I ever had beyond the fact of the kills and the devoured carcasses left behind was this strange paw print.



Today, early this AM I let one of the Toms out. We still have a lot of snow on the ground so he wandered down the driveway, sat there awhile then came back in. Late this afternoon I went out to check my mail box. Down at the bottom of the driveway I observed strange tracks coming out of the forest and very clearly exactly following (as in right alongside of) the paw prints of my cat. Right up to the doorway of the house, then it turned and meandered around the house and disappeared into the woods in back.

Again I have photographed the prints and present them here. I am puzzled by them. I have spent several hours on line attempting to match them to the tracks of known species with no success. I present the imagery to you below. I am open to reasonable suggestions (no, it is not a midget bigfoot). These are, as you can see about twice the size of the paw print of a large domestic cat. No (supposedly) predator species in North America has both 3 pads on the foot and 3 prominent claws. There should be 4 or 5 pads. Just like the thing in the woods, there are 3. Herbivores have two. Anyone have a sane idea what I am dealing with?



A different track



It does not appear to be wolf or coyote and is the wrong shape for a big cat.

I was sent this on F/B so it is a cut and past.....
Let me know if I am offending anyone or breaking any rules

A pig's o*gasm lasts 30 minutes. (O.M.G.!!!) A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy. I'm still not over the pig.) The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. (Honey, I'm home . What the...?) The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping
the length of a football field. (30 minutes. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?) The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds. (What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?) Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (I still can't believe that pig ...quality over quantity.) Butterflies taste with their feet. (Something I always wanted to know.) Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump. (Okay, so that would be a good thing.) A cat's urine glows under a black light. (I wonder how much the government paid to figure that out.) An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some people like that.) Starfish have no brains. (I know some people like that, too.) Polar bears are left-handed. (Talk about a southpaw.) Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (What about that pig? Do the dolphins know about the pig?) Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread these crazy facts. (and gotta love that pig)!!!

There was this one guy, relentlessly writing to me, wanting to Skype with me but I keep on refusing him

He soon got angry and told me that I look like a ..........goat!!

I went to my own profile and took a good look at myself.

And you know what scares me? I agree with him!!

After much inspection, I realize I do look like a goat!!

It must be quite hard to be one of those people of whom when in their presence fell the need to make you feel small, Perhaps just to flesh out their own deflated and hidden nature. Like cats in a bird cage they would have your wings clipped to play with you on the ground while watching the dying of your light because they cannot comprehend the freedom of your flight.

Everything done and I'm ready for an afternoon of rugby but first must just check the chickens, big mistake, took a few bits of salad stuff with me chucked it over the fence. Oh dear I've a chicken hobbling worse than me, I'm waiting for a new knee.it then decides it didn't want catching and let's play hide and seek below the fig tree, air is now turning blue. Finally caught the little darling, under my arm and hobble to the garage to find a box, no boxes I know cat basket, cat basket is in the garage loft more blue air, now where my brains were I've no idea because I'm now climbing the ladder still with little poppet under my arm, yes it's looking at me all the time like I'm bonkers, dam can't reach the basket, back down grab a broom, back up, yes still haven't put down the chicken, hook the basket and down we come. Chicken is now sat on the kitchen table while I think, shame I didn't do that first. I know I'll go to my farmer neighbour and ask their advice, now bear in mind walking is not easy so I pop the chicken in the basket on the seat next to me and drive the 200 meters. Explain to said neighbours I think it's ill do I need to go to the vets with it, chicken is thoroughly checked while their laughing to inform me nothing wrong with it it's just old.
Back now I can watch the rugby, Sat quite happily and a mouse runs across the floor. Normally I manage to guide them out through the front door, not this one, furniture moved so it runs to the other end of the room, more furniture moved, Hoover going, yes they don't like that sound.my friend comes round to make sure I'm behaving and relaxing. Now there's the two of us trying to catch it, me with a useless leg and as she's just had an op on her shoulder one arm.what's it doing, it's climbing my bottles of wine in the rack and I'm not happy at that, as we take out the bottom row up it goes, next row up it goes, it now has a broom up its bum and sets off across the floor again. Yes finally got it in a bucket and dispatched, it should never have touched my wine.

This is a first for me. Blogging from the bathtub. My apologies for not taking pics of the event.

I'm already regretting this decision and see it as foolish, and so does my justifiably aquaphobic phone.

I think I quit smoking but still feel the urge. For this reason, I wrote "trying to quit" in my profile. "I reserve the right to kill myself via smoke inhalation" is maybe how it should read.

One of the benefits is that my singing voice has improved. This may yield higher mileage on a dating site where the talent competition between writers, photographers, and cut-and-paste dullards is getting fierce!

Here's my submission to the CS Idol judges who will undoubtedly believe that Tony Bennet is in the room.

Step away from the gong, please!

I could jump five times my own height from a sitting position.

I could groom myself whenever I didn't want to talk to somebody, and no-one would be offended.

I could take off for several days at a time, and be greeted lovingly on my return, no explanation required.

I could sleep as much as I wanted, and complain when anyone tried to wake me up, without being resented.

I could close in for a hug whenever I liked, but could also pull away from a hug when I wasn't in the mood, and both reactions would be accepted without question.

I could turn my nose up at the meal that had been prepared for me, and if I was spoiled enough, another option would instantly be offered.

I could share myself out between several owners*, taking my time to decide which offered the best options. (*Cats don't have owners, they have staff.)

I could demand attention, and get it, whenever I wanted.

Nobody would expect me to do a thing around the house, or even be good-natured. They would still love me, feed me and look after me.

I was born into the wrong species. Does anyone know where I can put in for a transfer?