C'mon ... this is just kneejerk reaction to change !
The old look was getting terribly dated, there was such a huge amount of small text links crammed up at the top of the pagea and in general it was very cluttered!
BUT ... while it was familiar to existing users ( many of whom have been here sink Noah was a boy ) I suspect that it could have deterred new members! Keep in mind the average attention span when browing is 3 seconds and if the site failed to 'grab attention' in that time ... clickthrough to another.
All that said it might have been smarter to have mentioned that there was going to be change and perhaps even solicit input from members ... my feeling is that many people are heavily invested emotionally in the site ( more than is healthy in some cases I suspect ) and the 'sudden change' is alienating a few ? besides, it always wiser to give people 'what they want' rather than impose what Management think they should have ?
I'm still supportive of the new layout ... actually maybe it serves to remind us that if we we ever do find a new partner then there's a period of fumbling around n feeling your way ?
Different cultures have different expectations, mostly people date and marry into their own culture ( and that's difficult enough these days ) so dating across culture ... many people think of it like 'catalogue shopping' except with catalogue shopping it's easier to send an item back!
Some countries have gained a reputation ( deserved or not) for scamming, Nigeria has the worst rep but other African countries are not far behind. Men from non western cultures have a rep ( again deserved or not ) for being disrespectful of the rights that women in the west take for granted!
The Universal Single Piece of Advice I can suggest
"Quit whining and complaining " ( on account of it makes you look weak stupid & needy )
Pay attention to the results you're getting (including no replies) and maybe think of this like fishing or hunting ... would you keep fishing in the same pond if you never caught anything ... or would you maybe have a look in a different pond ? Would you keep hunting on the plains if all the signs were that all the game was in the bush?
Every day millions of pieces of advertising material (flyers) are dropped in letterboxes all over the world, and every day about 98% of those flyers go unread into the bin.
The people who wrote those flyers put THEIR hearts and souls into the production too!
So, in answering YOU complaint I'll ask you a question... okay?
When YOU get a flier from a local tradesman, or a cleaning company or whoever do YOU ring up that company and say 'Hey, thanks for the flier, sorry not interested in your offering?'
No, you don't!
Actions speak louder than words and there's no action that speaks louder than ignoring an unwanted approach ... mine, yours, incoming or outgoing nobody owes anyone a reply.
So, here's the solution and it's guarnatted to work 100% of the time ... ie IT NEVER FAILS !
I can imagine GW Bush and Tony Blair arriving at the Pearly gates of Heaven and being stopped by St Peter ... who show s them a re-run of their conversations, their invention of phoney WoMDs and the years of misery that have followed
Puzzled look ... you do realise that a good deal, if not in fact most of the trouble in the world today arises out of a) the random lines drawn by the US/AK allies after WW2 and b) the exuberance of the arms trade ?
Perhaps if our great countries were involved selling hose pipes and brushes instead of bombers, bombs, mines, grenades and guns we might hope to see cleaner, rather than bloodier yards?
The outcome would depend entirely upon what was put in the test and the motivations of the people who created and administered it, not to mention their own political allegiances for the translation.
It's funny you mention police officers in this respect ... so many former military in the police nowadays yet, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to quiz the wisdom of hiring someone who sees other as A) The Enemy and B) Targets to be killed.
Perhaps it would be altogether a more sane scenario if the rigging that we've seen so far ie Bernie Sanders should really be competing against Trump) ?
And, if were ACTUALLY a democracy then wouldn't the GoP be smarter to get behind Trump - whom 'The People' have selected so their party would at least form the next government ?
Now that we've made peace between north and south ... shall we start tidying up some of the more minor global problems ... MIddle East, North Korea, USA etc ???
Gi ower ... even an authentically 'thick' Geordie can act at an intellectual level several random doctorates above the average London Pride swiller !!!
I was born and raised in a household with both parents working and everyone pulled their weight from as early as they were able ... so I could peel potatoes from about six yo, by 9 was developing 'sharp knife' skills and at 11 could handle making Sunday lunch and the 'ordinary' everyday meals that were standard for the mid / late sixties.
I suppose my mother employed the Tom Sawyer Educational Strategy and whatever we were NOT allowed to do ( using vacuum / washing machine or etc) we pestered until we could ( You recall the fence TS was asked to paint?)
A period of teen rebellion against what I considered parental oppression (ideas change) led me to the discovery (circa 16yo) of pre-blended curry powders which produced various strengths of toxic fumes while being cooked - the ideal non violent answer to that matter ... and later I learned how to cook curry properly from 'real ingredients)
( I regard learning how to cook curry as a basic male survival skill and a great aid to dating )
Very few items these days actually require ironing - the occasional formal shirt perhaps and dress trousers perhaps, but even those can often be thrown in the washing machine and air dry keeping the crease!
A woman's role in the relationship ... becomes obvious after a while living with one.
It's plainly to provide a steady (if not uninterrupted) stream of wants and to create problems that enable the bloke to stay sharp and develop his intellectual and emotional problem solving skills!
When a man who can't look after himself falls into the clutches of a woman then he becomes 'domesticated' in the same way as a hunting dog when it's retired .... both have their balls chopped off and end up fat and useless!
Gives thread a bump to keep it alive for Mr Humble ... I'm sure other's must have some thoughts ... I'm sure that at least the kinder thoughts or at least gently expressed would be welcomed ????
Hurt feelings ... all I can say there brother is 'Get Over It'
It's NOT IN ANY WAY discrimination according to any law that I ever heard of if a woman is simply 'not interested' for whatever reason ... and that still applies whether she doesn't like your face, the colour of your skin, the religion you follow, the absence of religious beliefs, whether you're missing arms, legs or intellect ... she ( and us guys too ) have the absolute right to choose who they reply too or ignore.
You might think it rude and insulting to hear 'No, not interested in dating a deaf person' but y'know ... that's called being honest !
I've said many times that ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS ... the act of NOT REPLYING paints a very clear picture that the person written to IS NOT INTERESTED !
I hope I've managed to write plainly, clearly and simply so that you can understand ... if you wanted 'advice' it would be this (and it applies to every single person on the planet too !
a) Look at the goal I'm seeking b) Identify all of the obstacles to achievement c) Be ruthless with myself and realise that the only things that I CAN CHANGE are those elements that relate to me personally ( Like, I wanna date a runner ... I'd bet get really fit! OR 'I wanna date a deaf person I'd better learn US Sign Language' )
I worked with some great trianers over the years so I'll leave you with a tip from Brian Tracy ( Canadian guy - he's a legend)
Don't waste energy on complaining or trying to explain ... just do the things you CAN do !
Best wishes ... and make your own luck ... we all have to ;)
Where to begin dude ... and I'll try and make this as compassionate as possible, remembering always that even 'good english' can be ambiguous at times OK !
1) If you can write all that i.e. all of the original thread post ... you can write an e-mail, it's not beyond you. One of the attractions of the site, not to mention one of the obvious 'protections' is the degree of privacy offered by having mails sent 'here' rather than to private, personal everyday email addresses etc. If a person is 'not entirely a good person' then they can simply be blocked here - whereas if they have been trusted with 'off site' details then maybe they turn into a stalker. Also, scammers DO operate on web sites and CS Admin are pretty good at ferreting them out. BUT once the conversation goes off site that 'protection' is lost ... so many (esp women) will insist on using CS and not give personal details till they feel 'sure' about the person who contacted them.
2) It's pretty much essential that any man who makes contact with a woman can communicate 'at her level' and in her own language. Forgive me if I;m wrong but I don;t think deafness gets in the way of understanding the use of language ... sentence structure, grammar, spelling etc? There are also voice to typing software apps available but I'm not knowledgeable to recommend. Is there a local Deaf Society or similar that you can seek help through?
3) Frankly that paragraph would turn many women off ... arguing that it's agains Anti Discrimination Law is (in my opinion) a very week argument based on the use of victim language. The site is professionally run, Admin do a lot to weed out scammers and that cut n paste is accurate ... some scammers do exactly that.
The thing about talking via a telephone translator ... I don't know the Sorensen system but there is something similar in NZ to help deaf people communicate with hearing people on phone - I discovered it by chance when I needed a builder.
It's a very cool system for practical matters (like talking to a tradesperson) but I really don't think very many people would be interested in using it for conversations of a personal or romantic nature ...' Maybe people will add to the thread and tell us both ?
I just did a quick 'google search' using keywords DEAF DATING USA - almost half million listings, and the whole first page was listings that would suggest there's a lot of services there that have been created by and for deaf people who want to date.
That's NOT IN ANYWAY AT ALL telling you to 'not be here' OK !!!
As you've said yourself COMMUNICATION IS IMPORTANT ... and if you can't communicate well here then ... well, I guess this thread was created out of the frustration you're feeling, right?
:-) Maybe it's like fishing ... if you wanna catch trout you don't fish into the ocean from a pier, and if you're shark fishing you'll not find those in an inland lake eh!
Ireland and NZ are already being bought up ... we both have more than our share of wealthy americans, and down here we have way more than our share of Asians.
The govt here are selling the country out from under our feet ...
Come on the Ms Hysteria ... c'mon then ... out of the closet and lets hear YOUR medical qualifications!
Of course the health of a future president is important ... and we've already seen people die in Benghazi - why was that, was it because she was having an extended Nana nap, or maybe she just didn't have mental energy to realise what was happening?
Trump ... UNLEARNED ?
How on earth did you arrive at that conclusion ... here's a man who engages with the press on every occasion, speaks from his own personal knowledge on world affairs and plainly loves The USA ?
NZ is a stock breeding nation and yet the Govt make sure that farmers take better care of livestock than many NZ's can take care of themselves and their families ( ie human breeding stock)
As a result of poor nutrition and lifestyle we're now seeing the last of the 'super kiwis' these are those in the 70 plus bracket who are fitter than their own children and definitely fitter / stronger and healthier than their grandchildren.
I'm sure you can look round your neighbourhood and see this ... one of my neighbours is a chap of circa 90 years, he's out and about every day and to date he's seen the loss of both a child and a grandchild to 'ordinary' health issues ... heart disease and the like!
Those 'super kiwis' had the best of everything 'organic' ( before organic even existed as a label) Good fresh veg, good often homegrown and locally killed meat, a physical lifestyle (due to the nature of life those days) clean water (no chloride or flouride) un additivised whole flower (no bromides and humectants etc) clean fresh WHOLE milk ... nothing added and not 'robbed' of all its solids to become 'standard homogenised white stuff in a bottle'
I could continue at length ... but why, I'm sure you know and have seen much the same all over !
Freedom of speech and free press is also guaranteed by the US Constitution ... but you'd never believe so when you say the play of favouritism and dissing anyone who opposes their friends!
And that's before we even discuss the censorship of Political Corectness !
Well, I suppose the Big Question is 'If the USA and UK can have nuclear weapons then 'why not everyone else?'
It seems somewhat ludicrous that western nations screwed up the environment with pollution and weapons testing and then they pick n choose what agreements 'for the general good' they will / will not agree / adhere to / tear up when they later conflict with the plan for global military domination eh?
The west fuelled it's own growth entirely by burning carbon based fossil fuels but now it want's India and China ( and etc) to deny themselves that same right to 'economically cheap' fuel ?
It's just the same behaviour that's seen in all corporates on a personal level expanded to global ... fight and hurt whoever to get to the top and then kick the ladder away!
We have the rainbow as a promise that humanity will not be culled back by flood and we have already seen US especially the construction of underground cities - in preparation for a nuclear holocaust perhaps? Why build such places unless one had an idea what was coming, and had perhaps planned those events also ?
HexagonKeySet Forum Posts (3,829)
RE: New site changes
C'mon ... this is just kneejerk reaction to change !The old look was getting terribly dated, there was such a huge amount of small text links crammed up at the top of the pagea and in general it was very cluttered!
BUT ... while it was familiar to existing users ( many of whom have been here sink Noah was a boy ) I suspect that it could have deterred new members! Keep in mind the average attention span when browing is 3 seconds and if the site failed to 'grab attention' in that time ... clickthrough to another.
All that said it might have been smarter to have mentioned that there was going to be change and perhaps even solicit input from members ... my feeling is that many people are heavily invested emotionally in the site ( more than is healthy in some cases I suspect ) and the 'sudden change' is alienating a few ? besides, it always wiser to give people 'what they want' rather than impose what Management think they should have ?
I'm still supportive of the new layout ... actually maybe it serves to remind us that if we we ever do find a new partner then there's a period of fumbling around n feeling your way ?