White Lies
Some people believe that there are times when a lie will serve better than the truth and then they call it a white lie. I find it hard to reconcile myself with such a philosophy because I think it is yellow if you don’t have the guts to tell the truth; regardless of the results.
Let’s take a hypothetical case and imagine that your forty year old somewhat overweight mother, wife, sister, girlfriend, cousin, niece or whatever approaches you in a dress that sits way above her knees and asks you if she looks OK. It is obvious that she has her doubts otherwise she would not have asked. Now how do you reply?
You could tell her the truth and there is a possibility that she may be pissed off with you for a few days but she’ll get over it and more importantly, she'll know the truth - if she had not known it before. Or you can deceive her with a lie to make her happy but in believing that lie, she may make a spectacle of herself in public.
I could ask you which reply served her better; the truth that made her unhappy or the lie that made her happy but I won’t. I’ll rather ask you which you can live with better: To displease with the truth or to create a short-lived illusion of satisfaction with a lie. But don’t answer; I’ll leave that with you to chew on.
Of course, if she did not ask, you could have kept quiet. Ok, maybe the ethnics are not right but you still had the option to exercise your right to remain silent. But now that she asked, you are in a predicament. And this gives you another reason to be truthful; for people should learn not ask questions if any of the possible answers will offend them.
Comments (76)
True, but both the stupid card and the old-age card are just white lies, It is so easy to fall into that hole. You cannot be neutral when you have to answer. It is either a lie or the truth. Even changing the subject can be construed as a white lie because it avoids the truth.
White lies about themselves annoy me more than other time because it usually turns out to be a blatant lie.
I can give you an excellent example:
I wish to cancel my flight because I chopped off my finger.
Of course, it even solicits some degree if sympathy and the cover gets better every year.
I'm going to exercise my right to remain silent.
there were no ulterior motives or hidden agendas when I misspelled your name.
It was a genuine mistake
When someone gave you HONEST opinions, did it mean that someone has told the TRUTH?
An honest opinion cannot be a lie; it may be be incorrect but that does not make it a lie; merely an incorrect opinion.
A lie is only when you know(or suspect) that you're not telling the truth. Being uninformed can sometimes make a fool of you but it can never make you dishonest.
By the way, in the old testament of the Christian bible Solomon says that even a fool can be deemed wise as long as he keeps his mouth shut.
Just for now?
Ok, I just woke up and I'm still exercising my right to remain silent. I have not spoken a word yet. Not surprising though; I'm alone and there is nobody around to talk to.
I thought " white lies" serves better to those very old persons who worried or doubted about their sick body ...
But if I met in your hypothetical case , I would say " so- so", let herself think about it...
You look gorgeous in your nighty!
Don't you believe that. Western men just love those oriental eyes and I personally that that Japanese women have the most beautiful eyes on earth.
It is a good thing that lies are not given away by colored smoke coming from the mouth. Some people would have been to scared to open their mouths and it would have been a very silent world that we live in.
I did not want to say it out aloud but I've been waiting all along for somebody to say it.
I really try to lead a simple and uncomplicated life and to to that you have to be honest with yourself and in being that, it automatically extends to other as well. when I encounter problems, I sort it out immediately before it gets complicated by other problems.
For some reason I missed your comment.
If you have a fire, you have too kill it while it is still small. Once it can roar it is too late and then all you can do is to wait for it until its fuel runs out.
Anyway, I think this blog can go to sleep now.
ps: g'nite blog... err... I mean, g'nite Cat
The dictionary defines altruism as 'the selfless concern for the well-being of others'. Very noble but does a white lie really improve the well-being of anybody other than the on who tells the white lie.
She asked me; Don't you think it is just perfect and I lied and told her that it was
She was so obvious proud and happy with that dress that I could not take that away from her
Had she taken me along and asked me then, I would have told her the truth, but felt is was too late now.
She was happy and that counted for me..............
I can see where you're going but I still wonder of the truth would have done much harm viewed in the light that you would have been truthful if you were going along with her.
I'm not being callous - at least, I don't have the intention - but it sounds is if you don't really care if she is on her own but when she is with you she has to be prim and proper. And my question is: Would it really have made her unhappy if you did not like the dress? Remember, this is all opinion and as she is entitled to hers, you are entitled to yours.
Forgive me if it sounds crude but this is the way I perceive it.
Btw I could have told you a white lie in saying that you did right but that would have defeated the purpose of this blog..
that seems to be the popular consensus but where do you draw the line or does it mean that the bigger the potential hurt, the bigger lie one can concoct.
What I find most mystifying is that it seems that people are reluctant to give an honest opinion when asked for it.
Well, that is exactly how I feel. Remember, this is opinion and if you don't want to hear my opinion, don't ask for it.
It's like if you meet an acquaintance on the street, and they ask how you are, the expected answer is 'fine, thanks' , 'good, thanks' etc.
They do not want to hear how you really are - how you are having trouble with constipation; that your bank account isn't as healthy as you'd like; that your dentures are chafing your gums
exactly, and more specialized, cross questioners in court don't ask any questions unless if the knew the answer. No surprises that way
that is the problem, We don't want to know the truth be cause we don't really care about the person. So why pretend?