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I recently say this question on another dating site's forum for dating over 45 years old. Some of this applies to you young'uns, but some doesn't. FYI I'm 64 and a widower.

Here's what I think about it. And I fully expect to get a lot of posts telling me I'm wrong, so go for it. All I ask is to be respectful. It's ok to disagree. It's not ok to insult someone you disagree with.


Romance is an illusion. It's physical attraction. It's a game we've been taught to play to justify our s*xual attraction to each other.
It's really just another word for lust, but we sugar coat it in sweet terms. It's romance novels, Wuthering Heights, Cinderella, and hundreds of Hollywood fantasies that we've come to accept as real. It's an intoxicating feeling, the release of chemicals in the brain.

Case in point. Every romance novel ever written. At some point, the bad boy rogue or anti-hero, grabs the woman, and kisses her strongly, (supposedly against her will) and she just melts in his arms. That's not romance, baby. That's pure lust.

Love is NOT that butterfly feeling you get in your stomach, or warm fuzzies you get when you cuddle with someone, it's not the weak knees you get when you kiss...that's not love. That's chemistry.

Falling in love, is not love. Love grows when two people recognize in each other the traits that define love:
compassion, forgiveness, caring for others, a giving spirit, the joy and sometimes heartache of shared experiences, good and bad, the desire to please each other in every way. If those things don't exist, love doesn't grow, which is why 50% or more marriages fail. They are founded on an illusion.

Love is the feeling you get when you give her flowers without a reason and you get joy from seeing the look on her face.

Love is baking a cake for her birthday that comes out looking like the Leaning Tower of Pisa and the two of you laugh about it till you cry.

Love is giving because you know in giving you receive.

Love is friendship carried to the nth degree.

Love is like a new pair of shoes that you really like, and even though they pinch a little now and then, eventually they stretch and become the most comfortable shoes you own. And no matter how many soles or heels you have to replace, you're not giving up those shoes.

Love is doing what she wants to do because you know that next time she'll do what you want to do.

I can confidently say these things because I was with a woman for 10 years. She was my caring, loving, giving, intelligent, funny, sassy, wisecracking, friend, lover, playmate, and partner in crime. And I held her hand and kissed her goodbye and closed her eyes forever as she died of breast cancer in my living room 9 years ago. Granted, 10 years isn't a lifetime, but it certainly felt that way.

anyone meet the love of their life on here yet? no? yes?

Well my friends I would like to say that since being on this dating site I met a loving, kind, sweet and compassionate man. We have met over 2 years ago and we are totally in LOVE with eachother... We have been Engaged for over a year now. We are actually getting Married August 8th 2016 in 3 months.So I can honestly say this connectingsingles.com dating site works. I decided to give love one more chance over 2 years ago and I'am happily in love and found my man to spend the rest of my life with
I encourage everyone on here if you are looking for true lI've and a romance like I did than don't give up you will find he or she very soon. GOOD LUCK and God Bless my friends!!

I remember when I first tried it out last year. Just half an hour after I had made a profile on another site, I had 3 new messages from women. Of course I had to pay a small amount to be able to read them though. That's how they reel you in - with bots sending you messages. I already suspected that back then but the site also seemed to have a lot of genuine members and since the membership fee was just a few bucks, I decided to get it anyways.

And sure enough I did have some very interesting and funny convos with what I'm fairly certain were genuine people. At least they never exhibited any typical scammer signs. But funny how the minute my membership expired I started getting tons of messages from all these beautiful women again Bots at hard work!


The scammers are a story for themselves. Being a young techy guy well aware of their presence and not desperate in any way, I'm not exactly their favourite type of mark. Still, even I was surprised by how vast their operations are. You would think that at least some people from the typical scam countries would actually be genuine (and I bet they do exist) but everyone I talked to from those countries eventually wanted money.


There was a young african lady I found especially amusing. After exchanging 4-5 emails she was certain she loved me. I asked her how she could love someone she hardly knew anything about. Her reply? "Oh I want to get to know you better so I can then love you" And here I thought all along it was the other way around, get to know someone first and the loving bit comes later... how mistaken I had been!


And then there was that english woman that ended up having a go at me after asking how her day had been. I lost count of the number of insults she threw at me and how I should never contact her again (don't worry - no risk of that ever happening). To this day I'm not sure how me asking how her day triggered all that. My best guess would be a mental disorder and someone forgetting to take their medicines.


There's been good times too of course. A few good online friends I actually met on dating sites. Sometimes it doesn't click romantically but you get along great on a friendly level and for that I'm very grateful. There was also a woman I think would have been a great match for me and we were talking about her coming here to visit me. Unfortunately sometimes life gets in the way with stuff happening and we eventually fell out. Still brought me some hope though



The most common killjoy I encounter are with older women. I have a preference for them as we are often more on the same wavelength and more likely to click. I mainly write the ones that has an age range I fall within. On the odd times when I write someone I'm a little younger than what they specified, I'm always very polite about it and hope it didn't cause them any inconvience.


It's fine if she chooses to ignore my message. It's also fine if she chooses to respond and tell me she isn't interested. But what isn't fine is belittling or patronizing me. Just because I'm a lot younger doesn't automatically mean I'm a lot more stupid or immature than you are. And hey, if you are so wise and mature, would you even be having a tantrum over me contacting you in the first place? I think not.


Fortunately the majority of older women are nothing like that

So there's been some good and some bad but I keep on going, my lady is somewhere out there.

I wanted to know a little about other peoples experiences but I see in the rules I may not direct any questions to viewers so I won't ask that then.

A lifelong friend is getting married tomorrow. She spent a few months here with us and some of you may remember her as BeaPatient. I asked her to drop in some time but she declined the invitation and said that she will be removing her profile in due course. No, she did not meet him here.

Although she could never be more than a baby sister to me, I cannot help to feel a little pang of jealousy. I don’t know why it is, because I attended her first wedding and I did not feel like this then. I was invited to her wedding but I shall not be attending. The azzhole made her promise to ignore me in future. I cannot see her fulfilling that promise as her brother is my best friend and my sister is her best friend. Bumping into each other from time to time will be inevitable.

I don't know what kind of bozo extorts such a promise from his future wife. I can only hope that he’ll come to his senses as a marriage based on suspicion is doomed to failure. If I wanted her for a wife or a lover, she would have been years ago. What worries me the most is that, as with her first marriage, she is marrying for all the wrong reasons.

As a friend she will be very hard to replace. When I was sick she was always there to help me. Whether that be tidying up, bringing a plate of food, doing some shopping or anything else. When I had a few friends over for a barbecue or a party, I always asked her to act as hostess. A true friend in deed.

My father is furious with me for letting her ‘slip through my fingers’ for a second time, but he does not understand. I love Bea, but not that way.

And now, as I wrap up this blog, I feel a kind of emptiness inside. Such as if I have lost my old friend for ever. I should really call her to hear how she is and to wish her well in her new life, but I don’t want to be instrumental in her breaking her promise. Besides, I may just tell her not to marry him and that will be selfish.


Hey, it is Friday!!

Aren't they just fun and silly ?.................................

can a person be single and still living and sleeping in the same room with his /her ex?

hhmm...

I call my lover "night-man" because he is mine in the night and he belongs to his work in the day...except on week end if he is not traveling

He works as a pilot for commercial airlines and having that profession, it obliges him to be in an environment where beautiful women -stewardesses- are around him all the time... do I worried that he cheats ? NO! not at all because in the beginning of our relationship he explained that :

Relationship is when TWO people exchange their TRUST to be in ONE SHIP. He said, "Baby if you are not able to trust me or pretending that you could be trusted, you better speak out now...because trust is solitair. you can't trust me 90% or even 99%. You trust me fully 100% or you leave me and the same apply to me". I asked him at that time, "do you trust me.." he need 10 minutes to answer "Yes I do, very much!" but the I asked himto come back to me with the same question one month later because I need to 'see' him, I need to 'see' me... a month later he came back after few times he was on flying duty and asked me the same question... I looked deeply into his eyes, tried to speak with his eyes and all I saw was love... without any hesitation I said "YES, I can trust you!"

When old people made a proverb, it was not without any proof. It has been years I'm trying to understand things about human life, the connection among them. The connection among people is called society or networking and the connection between two persons is called RELATIONSHIP.

I think they picked a ship not a car or a plane (relationcar or relation plane) with deep thought that ship is sailing on the wide open of ocean with many challanges of it. The bad weather, the sharks or other mameles (correct me for the spelling please), the rain, the typhoons, the atols, the iceberg (like the Titanic), the pirate and many other obstacles nature could offer. These two people are trying to connect each other and live in ONE ship and it has to be TWO persons with full of love to each other that ship could arrive at the most beautiful harbor or port. One of the two must act as a Leader. They can not be both as leaders or both as followers or ship would never moving on. Once, one of the two doubt the other, the life in the ship would be disturbed. When one of the two lost his/her trust, the argue would be their daily activity. When one of the two try to look at another ship... then new ship would be born. Most of the cases, those two ships would never crossing each other, they would take different coordinate and arrive in different harbour.

Human is unique. I am twin, however, we are also different. Imagine how two different gender, background, belief, views trying to be together in one ship expecting to live in there till the end of their day? Love ! forever love ! but love is not stand alone. It has many ingredients : TRUST, Common things, understanding, responsibility, respect, team work, honesty, loyality, sex and money are followed afterward (hey.. what a date mean if it is not ended by love making in nice place )

It is important to know WHO and HOW is your parnert before you confirm to be in one ship. And the length of time you need to make a confirmation is relative and come in different way. Some people only need a second to say "I trust you", some need ages and still not able to give it. BUT, believe me, if you are pretending simply you could trust him or pretending could be trusted, at the same time you are putting worms (cacing) in the ship. It is just about the time for the worms to shink to ship.

He also said " If you can't afford to be in relationSHIP, take relationPLANE ! fly once crash once and everything is dead"

That's what my ego said about relationship and his ego's too. You are of course free to have your own view of your relationship... and We are almost 6 months together happily...

What the f*ck ever happened to people beening Honest and NOT Lieing...