Self-Improvement Blogs (525)

The ancients saw clairvoyant predictive value, Freud saw wish fulfillment, modern neuroscience---processing, storing and consolidation of memories. Look at Spanish cave art, and earlier woman saw hunted animals, and hubbies with those sexy large hands. But I digress. As I continue to evolve away from the chains of childhood traumata, thanks to my hot and brilliant Dr. M, and the art is long, believe me folks, my own dreams seem to be changing. Actually it sort of fits with the four theories as above. Fewer recalled episodes, yet what remain are much more intense. And there's more. As with the one a few weeks ago, where I actually FELT most sensations of being high, VERY high. Only wet dreams, VERY wet, seemed more experienced in the life. This morning, as I dreamed of an old GF, a lovely, decent lady, to whom I was a total crumb, whose new BF and I were inspecting water craft, I was impressed with how decent a (mid Eastern) fellow he was. When Ms. C. returned to the docks, with (real) tears in my eyes, I told her how happy I was for her new life, with such a nice man. But in the really striking part of the reverie, while looking at sails with this fine older man, we got to chatting about the political situation in Iran/Iraq. What wasn't striking was how lucid were his thoughts here. But that it all exactly dovetailed with a morning radio program on short wave, for a short guy, VERY short, which was all COMPLETELTY news to me, until the dream a few hours earlier. And his analysis was spot on, as HE, CC and Red would say. Sure, lots of alternative explanations, similar to those for deja and jamais vue phenomena. Starting to doubt such, though.. Bravo agrees. Grasping for the sacred I Ching. Ever onward, through the fog.

Happy New Year!

For the past few years, pretty much ever since I got out of the navy, I have had a relatively big fear of holding a gun in my hands. I know, this sounds silly, with me expressing a desire to join the army and everything. But one of my biggest fears, is actually guns. It's weird, because I have no issue with violent shooter video games. I think it's because I know that video games aren't real. The gun I am holding isn't a real gun, and the people that I shoot aren't real people. The same thing with movies. I know that the guns shot in movies are dummy guns, shooting blanks. Whenever someone dies, from being shot, in a movie, it's fake. The person is alright at the end of the take.

In order to combat that fear, I have begun watching YouTube channels, with guns as the main focus. Demolition Ranch is one of them. That channel practices safe gun handling, as well as educating people on the guns used. I used to watch FPS Russia as well, since that channel was meant to entertain about gun safety, as well as demonstrating just how destructive a gun really is. I found another gun channel, called Hickok45, which is being described, as a "drama-free, "family-friendly" shooting channel". I have yet to dig into the videos, but the titles and thumbnails look interesting.

Now, I want to attend a gun range at some point in my life. It would then seem fitting, that I visit one when I am in New York. I just need to figure out which one to visit, since there are a LOT of ranges to pick from. It has to be one that gives clear and good instructions, regarding safety, posture, education about the guns and generally makes me comfortable with shooting a gun.

This is where you come in: Do you know of any gun range in the Albany/Troy area, that practices any of the things I have listed? I would love to go to an outdoor range, if possible. Not a requirement, though :)

Please keep the comments to the topic. I will delete any comments that aren't relevant to the subject

....Yep, lets hear them.... Those hopeless, ephemeral, doomed, time and breath wasting New Years Resolutions. I've already hinted at mine. Including---much more targeted flirting. Being kinder to the world, including to dozens of strikingly lovely females nightly scratching at my front door. Less impossibly cognitively fathomable, intendedly putatively significant, somnolence immediately generating, ---cryptic scribbling. Above all those containing a trace of waxing narcissistic, on all my greatness and unmatched modesty. Much fewer rank base political meanderings. Ditto for comments on such, especially when sourced by AOC levels of thinking and knowledge base. And a few more, too personal to mention, except in more private venues. All have have had auspicious beginnings over the past few weeks. Except for the HARDest one, VERY hard. Abandoning my wanker ways of life. The flirting and tree house might just help with workable results on this last pledge.

My book has come out. Now local area could pre order it through my publisher website ONE PEACH MEDIA or visit their Instagram page.(Indonesia only)

FOUR PIECES.
To be honest it's not about chick love story instead it's about mental illness. Yes. It's dark and getting dark in every pages.
It's what I've felt before.
It's what people might have been through too.
Maybe it could be you,
It could be your brother or sister,
It could be your friends or your significant other.
Please, do something to help them,
Or at least be there for them.
Because, mental health issues, whatever it is, they need to know that we are care about them.
Don't judge them because you're not wearing their shoes. Instead be there for them.

So about my book, FOUR PIECES.

Why did I choose this dark genre instead of all those chick love story? You should have known me before, I don't like following mainstream. I'm a rule breaker. I'm stubborn. I don't want to put any burden on my back to write a story to please someone else's ego. I write what I've felt. I write what I've been dealing or what I've done so far. I guess that's the way of being an artist also an author from my opinion.

Yes, FOUR PIECES is more concerned about mental illness or mental health issues. It took ages for me to deal with that. It took ages for me to capture all the scenes on paper. But in one night, this idea came out one day when I heard my best friend lose her father. I texted her, we talked and all those parts turned into a draft and here we are now. I should have thanked her for it. She helped me lots about mental health issues. Long list.

And remember, it's okay for not feeling okay and get help.

REMEMBER, When you tell people about yourself and they couldn't accept it, that's not your fault.

You're not alone.

Suicide isn't the best option. NEVER. It's just the way you might think would end your pain TEMPORARY but the truth is, you wish you could stop the time and run away.

Now Let's create some beautiful memories together instead of thinking about how this life would end. The sun's still look beautiful even if it looks hesitate.

#vivianlin #FOURPIECES #writing #book #mentalhealthawareness #mentalillness #mentalhealthissues #depression #anxiety #selfharm #bipolardisorderawareness #healing #recovery #preordernow #dearagony15

First time I'm writing this stuff on here. Anyway I just need a place to brainstorming my head, my thoughts and my anger toward things I couldn't handle it. I posted some poems here also, you can check it on my profile.

Yeah I used to write daily in my journal. I make and creating poems, quotes and story. My first book will launch soon in my country, FOUR PIECES and it used Bahasa not English. I'm writing the second one with English and hopefully I could share some of it here.

I have duties at work. Also an arrogant Boss. My job is fine but it has lot of pressure. Sometimes I'm stuck and I can't handle my emotions towards people around me because Boss have a trust issues and He wants me to be as perfect as he wanted me too. Well, I'm only human, I am not God and it's burdened me sometimes. Not sometimes but a lots. Perfection is not human and I hate it. I hate being that person everyday.

So, here's the thing about work and my circumstances:
When you've tried being nice, no bad intention,and just showing some respect and teamwork , hell etc heaven knows what I've done for, then suddenly they threw sh*t right back to you. Like---, wth? Then you started questioning and doubting yourself what on earth happened with me?
It is me or it's just in my head?
OR--- I'm too crazy to be a part of them? Then who's the one to blame?
Most of the time I've done my best and that's what I've got? Is it fair enough?

Enlighten me because I started to hate that If you know what I meant.
As a leader I think You should have known and aware about everything that had happened in your workplace and stop blaming someone else. Because there're lots of conflagration in your space but you've been busy pleasing someone else's problem instead of taking good care of your team.

Speak your mind unburden your soul say it as it is even say it as it isn't

Whatever you want

I have a neighbor… He comes from a family of criminals… Yep… They are on the web… Killers, robbers, drug sellers… But… He seems to want to do things “right” in his own way… And he is absolutely adorable with me… I have not a single complaint to make about him… He told me he loved lasagna, once… I asked him his birth date and said to him: “That day, we are going to eat lasagna… You and I”…
That day he was all dressed up… I said “Happy Birthday!!!”, hugged him and we started walking… I said: “Let´s stop at the bakery… A “pit stop”, jajajajajajajaja… He laughed and I told him to wait for me outside… I bought everything I thought he would enjoy eating… When I came out, we walked to a park and sat… I started taking all the stuff out and he was shocked… We had pizza, a huge piece of a very yummy cheese, sodas, ranch dressing… At one point, his eyes were teary and he said: “Elena, I will never forget this day”… I said: “Well, that´s my intention… To make it unforgettable”… At that moment, I saw a 56 year old man, with the face of a seven year old on Christmas Eve… My heart smiled… BIG… He saved some of the food for his youngest boy at home… He has TEN kids… All of them almost grown up, now… But they grew up under very hard conditions… We kept walking to our main destination and stopped for his birthday piece of cake… He picked the chocolate one and I picked the “Tres leches”… I had all the people there sing “Happy Birthday” and again, he had teary eyes… I bought another piece of cake for him to take home and after that, we couldn't eat anything else, but I bought him that lasagna anyways and he took it home… He hugged me and said “Thank you so much… I love you”…
A few days after, he knocked on my door and told me I had forgotten to turn my external lights off... I said: "Thank you so much for being so sweet to me"... He said: "You are the most wonderful neighbor, anyone can have, beautiful... Anything you need, just let me know"...

I believe kindness is contagious... I have seen it...

Do you agree with me?... Would you like to share your thoughts on this subject?...

We all know of the house of mirrors, when the circus comes to town...

You can be fat / thin / tall / short

What is urgently required is:
PERSONALITY Mirrors

We'll have some very sick people, about 99%

20/20...perfect vision.

2020...something revealed....enlightenment...perhaps