Would you date somebody that is less than half your age...
that you are not exactly attracted to, but they just threw themselves at you?Let's set some parameters. You are hitting an older age where you know you are not getting exactly younger.
The person, seems to be very mature and well grounded.
You are very good friends.
You have been single for over 10 years and the idea of adding someone to your life is a bit scary.
Their mom and dad is younger than you.
There are so many more. I think the best response, especially after having a couple of drinks was to say, I am flattered...and give her a hug.
Another parameter...you know there are some other people interested in you...but they are in a relationship, married...and have never come out and said anything...but you know their behavior around you speaks volumes. They are people you are attracted to....
So...how do you do the dance here
Comments (82)
When Art was meeting my mom for the first time, he asked, “Do you think I can call your mom “Mom”?”
Without a beat I answered, “Of course honey…..if you don’t mind being chased with a meat cleaver!!”
Art is a couple of years older than both my parents. I don’t think the age difference is that much of a big deal for any of us.
Forget age if you want her and she wants you. Is my advice.
Age do matter.... i am always
little uncomfortable...
(anyone even 2 years less
than me)
definitely.... not possible
for marriage.
maybe... my traditional
upbringing.....
(
When Art was meeting my mom for the first time, he asked, “Do you think I can call your mom “Mom”?”
Without a beat I answered, “Of course honey…..if you don’t mind being chased with a meat cleaver!!”
Art is a couple of years older than both my parents. I don’t think the age difference is that much of a big deal for any of us.
You want a one time fling? Then go for it. A relationship? Think with the head on your shoulders.
I say maturity counts. I prefer my man to be older than me.
He can teach me something or two. They say with age comes wisdom.
This all reminds me of a song from the past, titled "Into The Night" by Benny Mardones.
Not sure if these lyrics are totally correct, but they could be. I think they are - maybe. Sort of.
"She's just Sixty Years Old
Leave her alone, they say.
Separated by fools
who don't know what lust is yet."
"But I want you to know
If I had a forklift
I'd pick you up
I'd take you into the night
and show you a love
like you've never seen - ever seen"
PS: She was 60 or something like that.
And when she learned of my age, this was her reaction:
Uh, I kinda think she wanted a younger man.
Oh well.
Thank you for your words of wisdom.
Yes, the age seems a bit much for me, she is only 22.
The biggest issue for me is that I am not completely attracted to her...
She is very mature, entrepreneurial spirit, and quite frankly, she has more balls than me.
...very friendly...everything one would want in a gf.
But being a man, attraction is very compelling though. :(
My initial thought was that age was just a number...and it is. But with her being so young, she may not realize what life has to offer her yet. I am no prize, that is for sure.
I agree with you...Mimi and Art are perfect. You can tell they are so happy together.
I have deep admiration for her for her coming out and saying what she did.
Unfortunately, I do agree with you. A man is a very visual creature...and finding a partner attractive is paramount.
However, I don't know. Kindness is a very tough virtue to find these days...and she is very kind.
I appreciate your words.
What the hell,
is that a country song.
I'd pick you up
Ever consider that boys will want to shag their female teachers who are a few years older and the teacher who is older likes the idea of playing the dominant role as it empowers her.
In the case of girls growing up to believe the man should be wiser more together because he has had more experience in the world and should know what he wants to do with his life by the time he is 30. Well for some it may be the case. For others there are those who never grew up but, mostly grew out still sitting on the couch of life never accomplished anything in life and now sitting writing blogs online discussing and or bestowing their profound wisdom of relationship failures and views of how the world should be.
That pretty much makes up the major population of boys here.
So, what is a girl in her late 50s early 60s to think about finding a man here or any other social site when she is over herself looking for her father image?
Instead she is now looking for her equal and the father image as sailed into the sunset long ago. Yet, what are we to say for the late 50s and 60s man who may have done something with his life and has at least a home and a reasonable retirement account. Yet, still can't find a girl to play with?
What are we to say for the boys who never did anything with their life except cry and whine and b*tch about how jilted and cheated he feels because he was all talk instead of the walk?
And for those types they have nothing to offer a woman at any age.
All they have going for them is writing blogs and poetry that nobody cares about and after awhile they just give up listening to the whining and complaining and don't even bother with such types.
People are generally attracted to upbeat positive people and want a leader. Couch potatoes who spend their life wanking over women they can't have or are not interested in them should focus on finding something more productive to do.
Overall, the same people, the same faces, the same overall results of the CS world where nobody is really connecting to anyone. Yet, without this world what else do some have?
Many will outwardly claim they have a life outside of CS yet, it's difficult to learn of that if they refuse to correspond beyond the blogs.
Overall, age has little to do about attraction vs personality. Yet, how is anyone to know people outside of the community if they refuse or selectively weed out possible options?
What are we to say about those who have been here for years but, do not get involved with the blog community? Many local women within a 2 hr drive in my state and not one ever involves themselves in the blog community or poetry. Maybe a forum or two.
Most of us are not getting any younger here or any prettier and if we waste too much time just f*cking around here going nowhere before we know it we are reading about our bloggers obituary.
If you find yourself (mentally) still searching after she enter (in that way),
then best let it go. Cos it's about the responsibility not only for your own happiness
but someone elses as well. Cool.
Friday afternoon, I picked her up at the station and we went to dinner. She said she liked me and wanted to spend the night. During the meal, her phone rang and it was her husband checking up on her. The story of 'going through a divorce' most likely was a lie... I figured she was looking for her next meal ticket.
After dinner, I dropped her off at her girlfriend's place. Sunday morning she called to ask if I would take her to the train station. I did and while waiting for the train she sat in my lap and I had my nose pressed to her silky black hair.
The train arrived and I said goodbye thinking I'm lucky to have turned down her offer as the one night could have put me in a world-of-pain for both my heart and wallet.
For a few years after, I would see her profile close and reopen with new photos and a new location. For a girl who had no job or money the photo backgrounds on yachts and around luxury cars was what I suspected all along.
I don't know about that. Although, I did once find the woman of my nightmares. YIKES!
Yeah, if I had a Forklift 'cause she was a bit heavy for me. I think it's all those darn Artificially flavored, imitation hamburgers she'd been getting from the mini-mart - gas station - liquor store - video rental - fix a flat tire - place.
Delayed puberty due to her favorite hangout
And social distancing.
If you are "very good" friends, with your massive age difference, then mental age, tick, we have a match. She may have an old head on her young shoulders, or you are still stuck in your 20s. That's actually pretty important. Lots of relationships are successful despite age issues. You need a common interest and a common goal as much as anything.
One thing for sure, you won't get good advice on the blogs. And just think how many more warning blogs you can give us if she mucks you about.
No, she wasn't 16 years old. She was old enough to be off Enfamil, but on Ensure with adult diapers.
She was 60 years old, and and she was no spring chicken.
Although, she did claim to be half innocent.
Thank you for the good read.
The internet and with it, social media has become a huge portion of people's lives. But, I do believe in a balance. Too much of one thing, in my opinion, is not a good thing.
I believe in getting out...exploring life on both plains...in real life and online, because real people are in both locations.
To me, it depends on what one is trying to accomplish in their lives. Is it money? Is it relationships? Is it for socializing? Is it to achieve a goal? Is it for productivity on achieving a purpose? Is it for greed? It is for happiness? Is it for enlightenment? Is it for knowledge or for children? What is the path of one's life and what is important to them. Some people have huge aspirations in live and many things the wish to achieve.
I think for me, living life in real life, instead of online, is more important and more meaningful...but there are aspects of my life that have meaning online as well.
For example, this blog. One person only has so many answers and so many opinions in formulating their next move in the real world. Asking for advice from such a wide diverse community here online, is invaluable to me.
The formation of online relationships (I am talking more than just friends)...from my experience, are super difficult. It is very easy to deceive and to be deceived. For those types of relationship, I would rather the in person way of making those. I am not saying they are impossible online, but just much more difficult, time consuming and expensive.
I completely agree with everything you have said. ....and how you go on and talking about couch potatoes and others who are on social media sites...they may actually make connections with others like themselves. The one who whines, complains, and writes poetry...may actually find somebody who loves that about them. Who knows, that one...might actually be the same exact type of person.
But...very good analyzation that I think holds much truth. Is it good or bad
Very well put and I appreciate you sharing your opinion with me.
Yes...it is more than just about me.
Your advice is very well taken.
Very interesting story. You got lucky her phone rang during dinner.
It sounds like she was some sort of thrill seeker looking to be catered to in life. I feel bad for her husband. Hopefully, it is an ex-husband by now. Although, I guess, people have open relationships now days.
But still lucky for you, I agree...it would have been bad for your wallet and heart.
Around where I am from, it is a very small community. Everyone knows each other....well, I guess everyone knows each other's public persona. There are some things that happen around here that do surprise people. I guess, I don't want to be on that next surprise list.
She had the balls to express her feelings to me...and she is a kind woman in her demeanor. I think both of those can easily exist within one person.
Good point about one's mentality. I do have more of a childish side to me at times, and yes, she does come across as a mature person. So...maybe a combination of the two.
I am pretty sure there will be no mucking around...so, most likely no more blogs about this.
However, I will be seeing her tonight....
Be careful. Them younger ones could wear you out!
Best to take a few v*agra pills with you, just in case. Gotta keep up that endurance.
Wait a minute, not just the younger ones, the older ladies are more experienced and they can really wear you out as well. Whew!
Be careful out there! They want what they want when they want it. They don't accept No or Maybe for an answer either.
Anyways, have a cool weekend.
Now the gen gaps are way worse. You like rock, she likes rap. You want to rest, she wants to jog. You have no idea of her influencers, movie idols, musicians..and she has no idea who Credance is.
The farther apart the years, the less in common. I like that when I can't remember some actors name, my guy can. When I mention drive in movies, he does to..and the same movies. When my back hurts, so does his.