Article Comments (2,720)

It is sad when we are deceived by someone we come to care about. You can't let it ruin your future relationships. As true as it is that women can be as bad as men, you have to keep the faith.

your article is making me feel better, it puts things into perspective. i learned stuff i did wrong and how my insecurities played a role also. thanx

monica

Hey gymrat, you are remarkable!!!!! I love your response and the way it was said. Right On!!!! Love you sweetie! Keep up the good work!

Very good post. I know that when I was served with divorce papers and had to go through the agonizing pain of watching the world I knew go tumbling into oblivian, I thought of many ways of getting even with her. But then two things came to mind. 1. The divorce might not have happened if we had done a few things differently but both of us were mule headed and didn't want to talk about it. 2. I knew that if I did something dirty and illegal that I might be creating an unwanted relationship with my new friend "Bubba" down at the city jail. All I can say is what was said...let it go and learn something from all the pain you went through. You'll be a lot happier and a better person for doing so.

amazing post...
thanks for this...

I read your profile, and wanted to send you an email.

I was told I am blocked due to my age and location.

Fair enough.

You said you were a passionate woman; I love it when someone so passionately does not desire to hear from me.

Fair enough.

I just wanted to quote a line from an Edie Brickell song:

"Philosophy... is talk on a cereal box,
Religion... is a light in the fog.

"Philosophy... is a walk on a slippery rock
Religion... is a smile on a dog."

I don't know why these four lines always make my eyes misty. I guess their power of truth.

The other thing I wanted to say was the mighty ducks group photo.

Oh, and that I worked as a cashier for a passenger-ferry boats company. Our name was "Ferry Docks", and I always put the name on the deposit slip for the day's take as "Ferry Dogs". Nobody ever reprimanded me for it. Maybe everyone just more interested in the money beside the deposit slip than in my budding literary creativitism.

I loved your literary grammar. "A few"... and a plural case for the verb. Many other examples in your main text. The "I'm a women" I chalked up to its being a typo.

Why are men saying women play games? I am not a man, and I still don't know why people say that. I think it's the ease of expression that is so attractive about it. No two women play games the same way, and they don't play games in the first place. Those who play games are scammers and Goddesses. (Try to get a straight word out of God just once, and you'll see what I mean. The New Testament has more games-playing by the inspirator than all the women could on this site -- why the parbles? Why the temporal relevance? Why the need to interpret every statement? Is it complexity that makes us wonder at the Bible? I hardly think so. Complexity can be sorted out. Stupidity and incoherent compostition can't. So infinite complexity and incoherence have one thing in common: Hopelessly incomprehensibilty by man.)

What I mean is that to say "women play games" is a perfect umbrella expression to say "I'm too poor, fat, ugly and old to intgerest women. At first they act interested, but eventually they retract all the promises while they were still (falsely) believing I was nice, debonair and intelligent." Men can't say that, really, can they now. So they say "women play games". To the point, completely meaningless, and everyone understands it.

It's time we stood up, over our heads, and being over the overstanding, we won't be understanding to people who are in over their own heads with their lies.

THANKS FOR READING MY RED RUBIES--- THE PRICE OF A VIRTOUS WOMAN IS FAR ABOVE RUBIES! PROVERBS 31= LOVE AND MAKING LOVE IS SACRED AND PRIVATE- KEEP IT THAT WAY! PRIVACY IS HONORABLE AND KEEPS THE DEVIL OUT OF THE PICTURE!!!!--PTOTECT EACH OTHERS HEARTS AND FEELINGS-- I DO AND I WILL!!!

Ten reasons to date a married man:

1. He is not desparate, which means he doesn't act desparate. He makes up for the woman's loss of social respectability by being and acting dignified.

2. He is well fed, but not fat. He does not live on beer and pizza, and he has no visible signs, either physical or behavioural, of starvation syndrome on long week-end Mondays.

3. He knows how to please a woman. Any man who doesn't, is not married. Pre, post, or widowed, but never married.

4. The married man has a good job and lives a respectable social lifestyle.

5. He looks elagant. His wife's taste touches off on him. He won't come to a date with unshaven hair and a dirty tee. Or in his underwear on a hot day.

6. More imporantly than being elegant, he is clean. No days-old reeking of under-foreskin odour. No jam between toes. Never. He is... clean.

7. If the woman does not tell her mother or her girlfriends, or people at work that her boyfriend is married to another woman, then nobody will find out. He is not going to tell. I wouldn't think he would. So the dater woman does not risk at all any sort of reputational damage if she can keep her clapper shut. I know it's impossible to do, I am asking for too much, but don't blame the nice man for your inability to keep a secret.

8. The married man drives safely.

9. The married man gives to beggars and leaves huge tips to service personnella.

10. The married man is the last one to cheat on you. A cheater is a man who is commited to you, and has a lover on the side. In this definition, he can't cheat on you. He is cheating WITH you, so there is no chance in hell he will cheat on you. Try anything else, you stupid goose who put up the post in the name of Connecting Singles: Try marriage, resepectable lifestyle, virgin til you keal over, and your lovers will always cheat on you. Not him, not the married guy.

I agree with three of your four points.

The working professional woman of high calibre is busy, and her schedule's fullness, her battle-gear behavioural get-up at her place of employment, and her precious five minutes off the suits and out of the suit must all be absol-lutely respected. I respect a woman who can do all that for a promotion and a whatever. Men too. It's not me.

But please don't ask me not to ask her for money. If I am not allowed to do that, what's the point? Two and a half minutes of her time each month? Because her even more private life than her life with me, with her partner, chews up the other two-and-a-half minutes?

I can't call her at work... I can't drop in and goose her at her desk... I can't even look up at her window at night.

So fer crying out loud, at least I should have access to some of her money.

If not, she can go use her precious time for darning some socks or knitting two lines in a sweater each month until Christmas.

But whom can she give the sweater to when it's finished? That is YOUR question to answer, my dear young lady writer.

I have another thought about your plight. First I tell you the conclusion:

Do as you please.

Reason: men only look simple and uncomplicated. But they are humans, too, and as such, are completely unpredictable (with my being a sole exception. ALL women who've known me've called me predictable.)

So to scheem... is futile. You may be doing the right thing by the scheem, or the wrong thing. You may be doing the right thing by following your natural moral urges, or the wrong thing. "Right" and "wrong" being defined as "the thing that hooks him" or "the thing he will reject you for", respectively.

There is no telling ahead of time.

The only thing that will help you case is to look attractive. Everything else are reductive reasons to stop him from rejecting you.

If he finds you attractive, but you are too smart for his liking, he will reject you. If he finds you attractive, but you are too rich for his taste, he will reject you. Etc.

You can be all he ever wanted, or less, all the way down to all he ever wanted to not have, in small graduated steps on the scale of suitability; but if he doesn't like your looks, he will never bother with you.

In conlcusion, you're right, inasmuch as playing games is childish. On the other hand, you have no assurance whether playing games will help your cause or destroy your chances. It could go either way.

Let me add my two-penny's worth.
I know that women are sometimes genuinely not interested in a man, but sometimes it makes me wonder why I didn't get responses from some of the women on this site, especially if my message is deleted UNREAD. When I reply to profiles, sometimes I wonder:
- Will she think I'm fake?
- Will she think I'm someone in some African country pretending to be in London, England?
- Is she fed-up of hearing of scams or being on the receiving end of scams that she doesn't want anything to do with black men?
- Is this a scammer pretending to be a genuine woman? (It's a blessing in disguise if these don't reply)

Despite those concerns/obstacles, I still write with a positive attitude, believing that somewhere out there is that wonderful woman also looking for me and one day soon we will meet. Perhaps not on this site, but we will definitely meet.
Yes it's also occured to me that some of you reading this post are probably wondering, "is he for real or a scammer?"
Or am I now getting paranoid? :-)
Whatever happened to the days of boy meets girl, boy & girl love each other, boy & girl get married and face the challenges of life together as one?

Why waste your time spotting scammers and annoying them when you can spend that time actually communicating with genuine people?

This ridiculous article reminds me of that joke...



"Baby, you know how I feel about you...I love you!"


"But what about your wife?"


"Ahh, she thinks you're a tramp."

very interesting, it's sad to see something as simple as basic manners and politeness not being put in action, it makes all the difference

nice story
thanks for posting
it

I really enjoyed your article. There are few people these days who even know what it is to be a gentleman. I think the reason for this is that the family unit has been so plagued by divorce and fathers who have abandoned their children physically and emotionally. The lack of mentors for our young people to learn from is very disturbing, tragic and unfortunately will not be corrected soon enough.

Who wrote this article? The mother of a woman who considers herself professional? 100% laughable!

Can we say "Gender Biased"?

As a disclaimer, it should accurately state...

Harmful if Swallowed.

Well said yamani!

This is precisely why English is considered one of the most difficult languages to master. Excellent examples.

Watch out for Richard Harrell too. He uses the screen name richard_snow11. He took me for $280. After a week he was telling me that he loved me. He thinks that I'm in love with him and I am not. I don't know him well enough to love him. I don't even like him any more. I thought that he was charming and sweet and all he wants is my money (ha ha I'm broke).

I know the feeling all too well. My computer broke and i asked him to help me get a computer. Richard said that he wanted to transfer the money to my bank account. I told him that I don't know my account number which is true but I didn't feel right about giving him my account number. I asked him to wire me the money. He told me I had to send him $300 just to prove that I needed the money for a computer and that I wasn't trying to get money from him. Of course nearly every time he told me why he wanted me to do that his cell phone got extremely staticy. I tried looking him up on white pages both by name and the address in Illinois that he game me and he doesn't seem to exist in Illinois. The street he gave was in a different town even.He promised to send me $4000 to pay my bills only thing is you can't wire money out of Nigeria. I sent him the money then had Western Union refund it then he talked me back into sending him $280 which was my entire unemployment check for the week. That Friday he asked me for another $300 to which I told him that he would not be getting it from me. I don't have money to burn. I know have nearly $2000 in phone bills to pay because of him. He got mad at me because I went back to sleep and only woke up long enough to turn off the phone so that I could sleep. When I got upset that I couldn't even buy food for the week he'd tell me to calm down and not to worry and if I kept going he'd hang up on me because he couldn't deal with me being stressed out. I was yelling at him because he asked me for all the money that I had and he wanted more than that. For a week I couldn't do anything during the time that I knew him I had a cell phone get turned off, nearly had the other phone get turned off, and broke my computer. He didn't think I should get upset and stressed about bills that I needed to pay like the heat and electric bills. I had a hard time working because I need to be able to access my work schedule and print things out but with a cracked screen I was worried about using it and I would have had to download things to the library computer and pay per sheet to print stuff out. I could have been out on the street and he wouldn't have cared.

I emailed him about my first phone bill and he now thinks that we are going to get married and stuff and I just want the guy to pay the bills that he caused and get me the promised computer.

I found many scammers advertise and 'preach' religious talk in their profiles and first chat. "God-Fearing" is a term used repeatedly.

In summation, anyone of you who is approached (messaged) by, who you firmly believe to be, a "scammer", you know what to do. There is no need to bore us all with your tedious story about it and to share your "adventure". And if you are naive and/or stupid enough to be deceived by one, by all means keep it to yourself, so you don't appear to be a complete idiot.

Because on this site, no matter what is said or done, some dimwit will be easily fooled by someone and need to share their pathetic story of woe with anyone who will listen.

It's no wonder scammers come to this site. It's a chicken coop of birdbrains. And I have no doubt that the stories will continue to flow, no matter what is stated or advised.

postscript.the second love

this is one that God wants to give to us..it is spiritual..it is termed as fruit..such that is displayed in the life of any christian.
there are 2 passages...
I CORINTHIANS 13...NEW TESTAMENT. VERSES 4 TO 7
the word charity..means love..
also more in

GALATIONS CHAPTER 5 VERSES 22 AND 23. NEW TESTAMENT.

IF YOU NEED ANY FURTHER HELP..PLEASE LET ME KNOW..

Personally I would feel blessed to have the second love. I had hoped I had found it in the past, but it was nothing more than the former.

Many think that marriage should follow the course of the second kind. To just secure the second kind would be more than enough for me.

your very wise..and very pretty

Being true to yourself and the person you involved is the only way the relationship can sustain itself. If u loose your identity to please someone else, then they cant really love you?

Honesty, mutual respect, kindness, love and acceptance are all pre-requisites in a relationship. Every relationship comes with its negative and positive aspects, it what attracted you to the person in the first place, so why would u want them to change?

Im always havin 2 change 2 wat guys like..Im sick of it, wish they wud like me for me. wat do guys/girls want.?

yes it happens...but what about when you dont set to cahnge the other person and encourage them not to change.....you lose them that way to

Well I could haw sad all that and more...
I just thought that your spelling and grammar would be a little better than mine...
Great post...we agree

Honesty is the only foundation for a lasting relationship, mutual respect and loyalty are right next to it. Never become anyone else,....for anyone else.

I had an episode with my teenager but I thought back to my teenage years and all went away. I told him he can move out since he knows everything and it wouldn't be no problem now that he is grown. SO he didn't want to do it since he was so intelligent. SO I told him hey you can do it just go for it no probe-mo you know what you are doing. And then it was the opposite really fast so I made sure he was still going to move out and him and his girlfriend tried to get someone to come and get them and it has not been they way they thought it would be. So I said well what are your plans and then they completely changed! So now dad is stuck paying for everything and he is waiting for it to happen so he can have a life also. Maybe a few more weeks and it will who knows.... They are tricky I know because I was one once!

As a guy; I would NEVER watch any of these films; total girl films.

like