Catfoot Blog

Life Is Strange

Somebody I know became a signaler on the railroad. Some time ago he got very drunk after hearing that his father was in hospital. He was still drunk when he woke up the next morning but, having been in trouble about his bad attendance record, he went to work regardless.

I suppose he still smelled of alcohol because he was subjected to a breathalyser test and found to be under the influence of alcohol. He does not say so but it is possible that they had been watching him for a while because he has always been a bit heavy on the bottle.

After being fired, he appealed and managed to be re-instated on the grounds that he had been suffering from depression for years. He got away with being suspended without pay for two months but in addition he was demoted and his personnel file was marked as never to be employed as a signaler again.

Now he learned that the hearing of his case is public record and is posted on the Internet. All this, together with living alone, made him very bitter and at times he drowns himself in alcohol.

At times I feel very sorry for him but then other times, when I see his abrasive attitude to others, I feel he brought it onto himself.

It is not for me to judge him but am I wrong to feel this way?

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Mar 2014
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Who...Who...Who Is Stammering

Stammering is a speech disorder and people often make the mistake to believe that it only consist of the repetition of syllables. It can include the repetition of one or more words, the elongation of a sound, the inability to make a sound, the insertion of a sound and other non-verbal sounds like lip smacking and clearing of the throat.

A stammerer may have better days and off days. Some days he may not stammer at all. It is also noted that they seldom stammer when singing or reciting in a group; even if they all normally stammer.

Stammering has a negative impact on the stammerer. He may experience feelings of embarrassment, shame, frustration, fear, anger, and/or guilt. Especially so amongst children who are often mocked on the playground.

Children almost always outgrow stammering and some very famous people stammered as a child.

There is no single recognizable cause for stammering. While stammering can cause stress, it is not caused by stress but can be brought on by it. And, like in the case of blushing, if the person is self-conscious about it, he may drop into a vicious circle feeding itself.

We know very little about stammering. We don’t know what causes it but we do know it is not caused by stupidity, retardedness, anxiety or nervousness. Make it easy on him and pretend not to notice it.

Examples Of Stammering
Partial and whole syllables
c…c…can you,
un…un…under the mat.

Repetition Of Whole Words
Can…can…can you do it?
I can…I can…I can do today.

Elongation Of A Letter
LLLLast night was an…
MMMMaybe we can do it.

Interjections
I can… um…um… do it now.
I want to…ah…ah sleep now.

Blocks
A period while nothing is said despite trying to do so.

Non Verbal Sounds
Taking abnormally long to start talking.
Clearing the throat before or while talking.
Smacking the lips before or while talking.

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Mar 2014
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To Love Or Not To Love

You can stay as you are for the rest of your life… or you can love again. If you don’t try something, you will never know what it is like. And you can easily miss out on the love of your life; or you can be hurt again.

We don’t process our hurt in the same way. Some take it harder than others but that does not mean that the hurt is less. We all hurt the same. Some just deal with it better. Some suffer in solitude, some cope in silence while some recover in numbers. Never be obsessed with love. Obsession is the shortcut do disaster.

The quickest way to heal a broken heart is good gay company. Laughter remains the best medicine.

I have used the term 'It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved - Alfred Lord Tennyson' a few times in my comments during the last month to test the reaction. Of course the more accepted use of the phrase is 'It is better to have tried and failed than not to have tried at all – Teddy Roosevelt' though the first form was used in a poem as early as 1850. But then it was just a poem and can easily be offset by many other writings such as 'If I never loved I never would have cried – Simon & Garfunkel'.

When we are hurt in love we carry half the blame for picking the wrong person to fall in love with and the rest of the blame is also ours; for not wanting to see the signs before it was too late. After all, nobody forces us to fall in love. In all other things we learn by our mistakes. Why can’t we keep our eyes open in love too? For love is not blind. We just don’t want to see the flaws in the object of our love.

Nothing worth the while is ever easy. Why do we sometimes expect love to just fall into our laps. It don't come easy.

But the question is: 'Is it worth to throw away a lifetime’s happiness because you were hurt before?'

Only you will know the answer to that.

May you all have a wonderful day.

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Mar 2014
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The Local Circus

The main animal attraction at the local circus was a trained zebra. During a recent tour of the countryside the poor animal got sick and the vet in town suggested for the animal to stay on a one of the farms to be picked up again when the circus returned from the tour and so the show went on without their main attraction.

However, the zebra got better much sooner than expected and started walking around meeting the other animals. He first came across the dog.
'Hi,' he said. 'What are you and what do you do? '
'I’m a dog and I guard this place,' said the dog.

And the zebra went on and met the cat.
'Hi,' he said. 'What are you and what do you do?'
'I’m a cat and I catch the mice around here,' said the cat.

And the zebra went on and met the cow.
'Hi,' he said. 'What are you and what do you do?'
'I’m a cow and I give milk,' said the cow,

Very disappointed that nobody could do any tricks he went on. Then he met the bull.
'Hi,' he said. 'What are you and what is your job here?'
'Why you stupid donkey,' snorted the bull.
'Take off that silly looking pajamas and I’ll show you. '

I'll be going to sleep in a while but I hope you enjoy this old joke from my young days.

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Mar 2014
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The Innocence Of A Child

“How do you make love?” the five year old girl asked her little friend as she was getting a ride with him on his tricycle. He stopped and looked back at her.

“I don’t know,” he said, “I think it has something to do with kissing”

“I heard my sister telling her friend that she made love to your brother last time they went out,” the girl said. “They are going out again tonight. Why don’t you hide behind the seat to see what they do?

So it was arranged and that night he stowed away in his brother’s car; hiding behind the front seat. After the drive-in movie they drove off and stopped at a secluded spot where the seats were dropped back. The lad, still hiding, now under the seat, could not see anything but he could hear what was said. It did not sound like much fun to him because she kept on saying: “No!”

Eventually big brother got fed-up and he asked her: “Now, are we going to or are we not?” And again she said: “No!”

“Then get out and walk home, “ Big brother said. She opened the door and left. Big brother started the car and went home.

Early the next morning the lad got onto his tricycle and pedaled to his little friend waiting for him. She got onto the back of the tricycle with him.

“Do you know how the make love now?” she asked.

“Yes,” he said as he pedaled away to the other side of the block where he stopped. He got off the tricycles and asked her: “Now, are we going to or are we not?” And she said: “Yes, of course!”

He stood there thinking for a while and said: “Ok, then you take the tricycle; I will walk back home.”

Have a good day and ride your own tricycle.

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Mar 2014
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House Rules

We all have our own sets of house rules and expect others to adhere to it. When I still smoked I would not have dreamed to smoke in a friend’s house unless he told me that I could do so.

While I am a guest on somebody’s house I will follow his rules. I will not tell him how to fry my eggs unless he asked me to do so. I will eat what he offers and will not ask for salt, pepper, tomato sauce or mayonnaise if it is not on the table. I will leave the toilet seat in the position that I found it. Even if he tells me that I must be in by 10pm, I will comply. It is his house and his rules. If I don’t like it, I must go elsewhere.

But I expect the same behaviour from my guests. You are welcome in my home for as long as you stick to my rules.

I no longer smoke but half my friends do. I don’t mind people smoking in my house but don’t come telling me I may not smoke in my house and don’t try to prevent others from smoking in my house while I’m happy to allow them. I will not lock my cat in a dark room or chase him out the house because somebody or his wife is allergic to cat hair.

You don’t contribute a cent to my household and I will not ask you to do so while you are under my roof. If you are not comfortable with my friendship, my hospitality or what I have to offer you, then rather go elsewhere.

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Mar 2014
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God Sent Me To You

Yes, that is what she said when I opened the door. I looked at her and I instinctively knew what was coming.

I listened to her sad story about the husband being out of a job, the hungry children at home and the perils of sleeping under a bridge for two weeks now. This girl, I decided, was too young to have three hungry children, too neatly dressed to have slept under a bridge and too smartly made up. Not asking for food; a cash donation, she said, will be appreciated. If she had left God out of the equation I may well have helped her.

You know what, I said, I have just spoken to Him – true – and He did not mention anything about sending you to me.

She left with a God bless you in order to make me feel bad and I stood in the door watching her leaving without closing my gate. I walked out to close the gate and noticed the strange man lurking at the corner, watching the girl. As I went back inside I saw the girl knocking on by my neighbor's door.

When she left a few minutes later I phoned my neighbor and asked him if God sent the girl to him too. How did you know that, he gasped and I told him. The resentment in his voice told me that he had fallen for her scam.

We quickly alerted the other neighbors and all agreed to phone the other people in the neighborhood to warn everybody.

A while ago I saw the girl, very red in the face, walking back to her partner on the corner. The fella who lives around the corner reported that they had a neat little Mazda parked there in front of his house. He had taken the number of it.

Surely this must be an illegal practice. The police said it is not but these people are obtaining funds under false pretenses. It really sounds like a form of fraud to me.

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Mar 2014
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Cliques In The Forming.

When my guests arrived for the party last night, I was quickly faced with a nightmare. The guests, who were made up by family, regular friends and colleagues, immediately condensed into 3 cliques with a few individuals hanging round the fringes not knowing if they belong or not.

But after a while I saw one of my fishing buddies talking to an academic about good fishing spots and they were soon joined by one of my cousins with a similar interest. Further on, near the bar counter, 4 people were discussing modern chess openings and at another spot, a small cluster were discussing the reasons for our local rugby team’s defeat the previous weekend. In another place a few ladies were exchanging email addresses in order to obtain a recipe or two.

As the evening proceeded groups formed and dissolved all the time. The cliques were broken… or were they merely replaced by other cliques?

Of course a few of the academics stuck together – talking shop - while a few of the others remained unattached drifting from one group to another. So funny, they were the first to leave.

Cliques are the natural way in which we group ourselves unknowingly by sticking to people with the same interest. And just as we surround ourselves with people thinking the same as us, we also avoid those who think different. It is natural selection process.

And then if you want to join a group and they don’t want you there for some reason or another… you blame the clique.

Or if you are so unique that you cannot fit into any group... you blame the clique.

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Mar 2014
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Home At Last

Officially on pension! I was a little late coming home today. I had to attend my own farewell party which was held in the staff canteen during lunch time. I could not stay for longer than an hour. I have another more important party scheduled for this evening.

Got me another watch for my trouble. I have 4 now. I don’t wear watches. Maybe I must put up a watch shop to keep me busy’.

Many years ago, after an argument with my dean, who is now the chancellor, I told somebody that when I leave that place, I will use his desk for a toilet. The story got to him and many months later he asked me in a joke if I would really do it. I said Yes and we both had a good laugh about it.

Last week I bought a plastic gimmick at a novelty shop resembling a fresh piece of human faeces complete with two flies on it. While having champagne and snacks, I sneaked out and paid a quick visit to the chancellor’s office and you will never guess what I left on his desk.

PS
There is absolutely no truth in the rumor that I kiss myself good-night in the mirror. The mirror kisses me good-night.

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Feb 2014
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Shark Finning

More and more sharks are caught solely for their fins while the remainder of the shark is discarded in the ocean; often while still alive. Shark finning at sea enables fishing vessels to increase profitability by increasing the number of sharks harvested, as they only have to store and transport the fins, by far the most profitable part of the shark.

Removal of a shark's fins prevents it from swimming. It is therefore incapable of hunting or avoiding predators. Further, some species lack the ability to pump water through their gills and must swim without rest; these species asphyxiate if unable to move.

Shark fins are among the most expensive seafood products, commonly retailing at US$400 per kg in the U.S, where finning is prohibited. Some buyers regard the whale shark and the basking shark as trophy species, and pay $10,000 to $20,000 for a fin.

In 2012 a 100 million sharks we caught.

About 75 shark attacks are reported worldwide each year while less than 10% of them are fatal.

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Feb 2014
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Forbidden Marriages

In most countries there is a list of forbidden marriages. A list of people you may not marry. Mostly for genetic reasons while some are due to moral reasons.

For instance a man may not marry his biological grandmother, mother, sister, daughter, granddaughter, aunt or niece. In addition he may not marry his step grandmother, step mother, step daughter or step granddaughter.

In most western countries there are also restrictions on the members of you spouse’s family who you may marry. This varies from country to country. Some countries make special provision for in case the spouse is still alive or deceased.

It is interesting that a man may marry his stepsister without problems. In most countries you may marry your cousin but some countries do require the sterilization of one or both parties.

So if you have plans to marry a rich old coot for his money with the hope to marry his son afterwards, it will be wise to check the laws of your country first. You may just end up high and dry.

Have a great Monday

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Feb 2014
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Preparing For Adult Life

Of all my birthdays as a child I can only remember one very vividly. It is remembered only because of the speech my mother delivered and the immediate effects of it.

She cornered me in my bedroom, took both my hands into hers and said:

My son, you are my firstborn child. Today you are ten years old and that is the half of twenty. To prepare you for your approaching adult life, you will from now on gradually share more and more of the responsibilities in this household…

The exact meaning of her words only struck me the next day when my father explained the workings of the lawnmower to me and how to clean it after use. From that day it became my duty. I had to buy the petrol and oil for it from my allowance, get a cash slip for it and claim the money back. It was paid back promptly upon producing the cash slip but when I got my allowance the first thing I did was to see to the lawn mower.

This was a duty that I retained for the next fifty one years until my father sold the house after he had the accident early last year. The lawnmowers came and went through the years but the ritual remained the same. Every month I bought the petrol and the oil and every month I received my money promptly upon producing the cash slip; no matter how trivial the amount.

As I got older I was entrusted with more duties but none as important as mowing the lawn. My late brother was detailed to wash the car when he turned 10 two years later. Another job he kept until his death in 2000, when my baby sister’s newly married husband made the job his own without asking or being asked to do it.

And for some strange reason the two of us became exceptional good friends since. All initiated by a speech on my 10th birthday when my sister was three days short of a year.

And now when I look back over the last sixty two years – well, that part since I can remember – I’m led to believe that it was the most important birthday in my life.

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Feb 2014
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This is a list of Catfoot's Blogs. Click here for Catfoot's Blog List

Catfoot Blog (616)

Life Is Strange

Who...Who...Who Is Stammering

To Love Or Not To Love

The Local Circus

The Innocence Of A Child

House Rules

God Sent Me To You

Cliques In The Forming.

Home At Last

Shark Finning

Forbidden Marriages

Preparing For Adult Life

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