Last Commented Dating & Relationships Blogs (2,544)

Trust- We must learn to trust our women, because that is one of the keys to a strong foundation. Don't assume that she is doing something just because you don't know her whereabouts at all times during the day. Besides if you need to know all that then you have serious control issues. But if she is doing something, then check yourself, because you may not be taking care of your business. But some women, like some men are scandalous and if that is the case move on.

Respect- this is major, we must respect our women. There is nothing cute or cool about dishonesty, we should work with each other in a relationship, because not everything will be pleasent, there will be problems, whether they are internal or external, the telling factor will be how a couple approaches those problems. Trust, Respect, and Communication are the keys. Many of us men while growing up were taught that it was cool to be a player, but we don't realize the damage we are doing to a females reputation as well as her outlook on life and future relationships. Society views men who sleep around as players and pimps, but when a woman does it she is a slut or whore. And it doesn't help when we refer to our wives or girlfriends as bitches. How can the woman that married you or the woman that had your children be referred to as a b*tch. Now that I am older I am thankful that my Grandmother, Mother, and 7 sisters did not subscribe to that philosophy, and taught me how to respect and treat a woman. Now does that make me special or better than other men ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!!!! What it does make me is a man who had the benefit of a support system of strong females, who instilled in me the meaning of being a true man, and how to appreciate a womans essence, beauty, and strength, while realizing the special joys that we experience in the treasures that are women.

Communication- It seems that more relationships fail from lack of communication than anything else. The main problem we have as men is we don't listen, many problems in a relationship could be solved if we would just listen. Ask your woman how her day was, and not because you want sex, but because you desire to be an intrical part of her life. Why do you think she doesn't come to you with a problem, because we don't listen. Try sitting on the sofa with your womans feet in your lap and just talk to her, let her know that you are able to do more than just jump up and down on her. Tell her all the things that made you fall in love with her, and show her that nothing has changed. A relationship is like a flower, it must be nurtered and watered every day to keep it alive, communication is the water.

I didn't and don't have a picture up for a reason just to see how many girls actually do go for looks and f*ck me it's no wonder there still single

Last week I read some book about communication used in psychoterapy. I was surprised to notice that we are part of a revolution regarding the interpretation of existence and the modeling of it, of human sense of life.

I was completely surpised to discover that many years after Freud and Jung, psychologists are approaching the psychology and psychoterapy similar to physics. The System Theory used by the physics and cybernetics changed the view of psychologists regarding normality. They started to use mathematical concepts in the analysis of human behaviour.

In process control I use, so called Control Loops based on Feedbacks, to lead the process according to our /my needs. This Loops may be simple or very complex. Reality and processes are not always explicte, clear. Mostly those are black boxes hard to understand. Special and complex tools are used to control those. a form of self regulation tool or device.

Reality and the system called life is permanently changing in a way we cannot understand. People are permanent changing because of interaction. Values are changing because of interaction. Normality is very fluid. No fixed rules. no fixed values. Everything is the result of our communication. We Exchange not only Messages but also feedbacks which change our behaviour instantly.

The relation we build is the consequence of our communication. Our relationship are a closed circle captive to our past actions so long we do not understand how human are exchangig feedbacks and how this regulate the behaviour in a relatinship.

Our relation is permanetly changing because of our communication. It is demonstrated that we cannot build a specific, a particular relationship, based on our expectations. When having expectation we ignore the other and his Feedbacks. In this case the communication stops and the realtionship dies in the sense that si not changing anymore. and when not changing everything becomes boring, with no taste, nor fun. People become two strangers.

The conclusion was - do not try to build a relationship. Communicate. The relationship is the result of this. Easy communication is the source of a beautiful realtionship. Learn how to communicate. The subject of communication does not matter. Only the how coomunication is done matters. Solve daily issues by using easy communication.

Many People know this already in the intuitive way. But many other people are stucked in the lack of communication.

"metacommunication, is a secondary communication (including indirect cues) about how a piece of information is meant to be interpreted. It is based on idea that the same message accompanied by different meta-communication can mean something entirely different, including its opposite, as in irony. The term was brought to prominence by Gregory Bateson to refer to "communication about communication", which he expanded to: "all exchanged cues and propositions about (a) codification and (b) relationship between the communicators". Metacommunication may or may not be congruent, supportive or contradictory of that verbal communication.["

"I'm amazed at how together you are" he scoffed. I might have mistaken it for a compliment hadn't I known it was sheer mockery. We'd been dating for three months.... Well, dating might be an overstatement. We had been in dialogue; specifically, antagonistic spats; clawing mostly at each other's eyeballs with the exception of a few moments of surrender from sheer exhaustion. He knew I was deeply into him, all the way up to my neck, keeping my head above water just so I could look at him down the nose. He is skilled at throwing curved balls and got me a few times, well... more than a few. How he crowed while I pretended it was much ado about nothing. He saw my pain and it pleased him. Sometimes he was less than successful, my smug satisfaction grating on his last nerve. On such occasions he dealt me the thing I dreaded the most... Silence. He knew how it twisted me into painful knots with every passing minute. It's been over a month since our last spat. Silence... Then out of the blue, a message, one week ago. I took all day to reply. He didn't even acknowledge my response, clearly irked by my resistance. We're now back to silence. God, I miss him so much. He tortures my soul but my bleeding heart refuses to let him go. Is it madness or is it love?

I want to know from others experience in regards to CS. I am here to actually meet someone in my area- CA. I am getting messages from other States and Countries at times. I unfortunately do not get many messages. The profiles seem too good to be true, like written from a romance novel. I've chatted to men who are widowed, stationed in Africa lol and asked for email to chat. I think the whole site is entertaining I guess but not realistic to meet someone. One said just from 2 emails he was in love and wanted me for marriage. It's all like the show CAtFiSH. At least no scammers for money. Definitely don't have any. haha. So, is this site legit or a weird joke ?

Actions carried out upon breakup: Delete photos, text, phone number, cut off any communication. Did they even ever exist? How do you handle it when the one you cared for is no longer in your life? Do you keep all the said above and wait for them to contact you again, giving you some kind of hope? How do you grieve? What actions do you take? Chalk it off to another one bites the dust and it's experience gained for the next relationship? How each of us handles a breakup is different. For me, I get everything that reminds me of them out of my life. I let it go. I cry, I evaluate the whole relationship and try to learn from it so I don't repeat past mistakes.....then I try to keep my heart open for the next that might come along.

Flirting is an art, they say.
Not that I am an expert or anything...
However, on my short stay as a CS citizen, I already have a few suggestions for guys on what not to do.

1. Endless "hello" e-mails.
I'll say it nicely: after the 18th HELLO, it gets kind of boring. If you don't have anything to say, just don't write.

2. Misogyny jokes
Most girls don't like it, me included.

3. Telling her you're helplessly in love with her after reading her profile and want to marry her.
Seriously, in what planet are you living?

4. Writing your personal details on your first e-mail
You're too easy, man, forget it.

5. Writing the same greeting e-mail twice to the same girl
First impression is important, but after that she'll be sure you're just shooting aimlessly.

New additions: thanks girls

6. Writing before reading her profile

7. Saying how beautiful the girl or her smile is...when they can't see it



Any thoughts to increase the list?

Guy: Are you serious?

Me: No, I'm funny.

And then he didn't write to me again.
Any ideas what I might have done wrong?

Love Quotes

Author: Gabriel Garcia Marques

I love you not for whom you are,
but who I am when I'm by your side.

No person deserves your tears,
and who deserves them won't make you cry.

Just because someone doesn't love you as you wish,
it doesn't mean you're not loved with all his/her being.

A true friend is the one,
who holds your hand and touches your heart.

The worst way to miss someone is,
to be seated by him/her and know you'll never have him/her.

Never stop smiling not even when you're sad,
someone might fall in love with your smile.

You may only be a person in this world,
but for someone you're the world.

Don't spend time with someone,
who doesn't care spending it with you.

Maybe God wants you to meet many wrong people,
before you meet the right one,
so when it happens you'll be thankful.

Don´t cry because it came to an end,
smile because it happened.

There will always be people who'll hurt you,
so you need to continue trusting, just be careful.

Become a better person and be sure to know who you are,
before meeting someone new and hoping that person knows who you are.

Don't struggle so much,
best things happen when not expected.

Since my boyhood I always have wondered what it means to be happy, to be fulfilled? As I grow older and now in my early 30s, after witnessing so many unsettled, unhappy faces I still wonder what actually we're after! Is it something that has a monetary value or is it something that we constantly failed ourselves to recognise, understand and pursue our goals? After living in one of the most diverse and most civilised country on earth I find it upsetting how we human beings are living and breathing in illusion or in a diluted situation by name or adapting a perception of what we call as complete!

We have become more of a living machines always taking our chances or balancing off the balance of probability. As we processed towards faster technological advancements shall we not consider that love has no boundaries, love knows no laws !! Can we not put aside the residency, the individuals outer beauty and concentrate on the person that we are in interested in !


Any thoughts anyone ?