mcradloff Poetry (529)

I went on a website where employees can rate their experience
Working for a company
The employee can rate their job from one star to five stars
I looked up Melaleuca, a company that sells bathroom, laundry, and health foods
Another was McDonalds that sells Happy Meals, one dollar sodas, and burgers
Cummins, is where I work, which sells engines, mufflers, and metal parts
Piggly Wiggly is a grocery chain that sells milk, donuts, and cheese curds
The highest score went to Melaleuca with an average over 30 reviews of 4
The second place went to McDonalds with an average of 3.9
The third place went to where I work at, Cummins, with an average of 3.8
The last place went to Piggly Wiggly with an average of 3.3
I have worked as a detassler of corn, packager of Swiss cheese
Developing photos in a photo lab, washing dishes, making burgers
Washing pots and pans, making Brie and Feta cheese, shipping bacon and ham
Mowing grass, picking up aluminum cans, and making mufflers
Helping skiers and snowboarders on the chair lift
Which was my favorite? Helping the people at Chestnut Mountain
Because the girls were pretty and positive, I sat most of the time
And I got to eat whatever I wanted and drink free Mt Dew and Hot Coco
My least favorite was Making Brie and Feta cheese
Because the work was hard and sweaty
And the people were mean backstabbers
I made minimum wage at my favorite job
I made one dollar more an hour at my least favorite job

Thanks George Carlin
I still listen to your jokes
Since I discovered you in 1992 with the comedy album
Jammin In New York
Thank you Michael Moore
You spoke of issues through your movies
Issues like job loss, murder in the U.S.A, 9/ll, and health care
I appreciate you U2
You inspire through your music with songs like
One, Where The Streets Have No Name, With Or Without You, and Vertigo
You're awesome Cranberries
I love Zombie, Dreams, and Linger
You're funny Dennis Leary
With your songs like the A#$%^&@ Song
And Life's Gonna Suck When You Grow Up
You're devilishly funny Leprechaun
I especially loved you in Leprechaun 3 when you went to Las Vegas
Thanks to all the Irish people who have brightened my day

There are so many who have come and gone through the years
Some were nice to be around, most were not
I'm super shy, so that sure doesn't help to foster a good time for me
I really wish I had gotten a job long ago where it was just me, myself, and I
But still I have the memories of these people, and that is something
The guy from Hardee's went golfing with me in 1988
The girl from Hardee's went out with me on a date
The girl from d*ck's got me, thank god she wasn't late
The teacher from Cassville made me a meal
The guy from Peru at the cheese plant in Belmont talked about potatoes with zeal
The young man from Fiji at the freezer plant in East Dubuque like my music a lot
The guy from South America at the muffler shop in Mineral Point was nice
The women at Chestnut in Galena were so pretty they would melt January ice
I could talk about the rest who weren't so well
But for now all I can say is...
They can just go to HELL!

There are many things you can do to keep America beautiful
Reuse plastic bottles and fill them from the tap
Don't throw garbage out of your car onto the side of the road
Instead put it in the trash when you get home
When hunting, fishing, or trapping, only take what is legally allowed
So the future generations can have an abundance of wild life
If you camp, be sure your fire is completely out, even the coals
If you must have children, have only one
So the future won't be overcrowded and the animals lose their habitats
Vote for candidates that believe in strong immigration laws
So the future children will have jobs and safe streets to play in
Recycle so we don't use up all our resources
Be kind to your neighbors so they will have peace in their hearts

I have always done my Christmas shopping early
Some may say I'm kinda squirrely
They love to shop on Thanksgiving and Black Friday
I say no way!
Get all that materialism out of the way early
So you can avoid a bunch of bargain hunter who behave too surely
I went yesterday on November first
To avoid all those people who behave the worst
Thanksgiving should be a day off for all
Not another reason to go to the mall
Some people never get a day off
Working seasonal jobs even if they have to cough
To give presents to some relatives they see only once a year
Getting together with people, if they weren't related, they'd steer clear
So now that I'm done with all the present buying
I can focus on things that won't leave me crying
Like Christmas movies and shows like Alf's Turkey In The Straw
About Alf befriending a homeless man who steers clear of the law
Or good food like turkey and pumpkin pie
And Peppermint Patty chewing out Charlie Brown
While he stand there with a sigh
It's more fun when we're not trying to save a buck
And if we do it right, we'll be in luck
For a Thanksgiving and Christmas that will be filled with joy
I hope yours is also one where you can say "Oh Boy!"
May all your holidays be shiny and bright
So we can all have a silent night

There is a movie called Needful Things
In it the devil comes to a small town of Castle Rock and set up a pawnshop
The items are extremely cheap
But you have to pull a mean prank on someone to fully pay for the item
A Mickey Mantle signed 1952 Topps basball card is worth 58,500 dollars
Brian Rusk paid only 90 cents and two pranks
Putting turkey crap on freshly laundered sheets drying on the clothesline
And throwing green apples through every window of the same house
The woman thought the woman at the diner did the prank, not Brian
Meanwhile, the woman who worked at the diner had her dog skinned
The guy who skinned the dog was paying for a letterman's jacket
Pranks being played on others to get people to hate each other
Hate each other enough to kill them
What would be our modern day needful things?
What price have we paid ?
Looking at our murders in this country, we have paid a huge price
The sad reality is there are Leeland Guants all over this country
Making money and making mahem for their own entertainment and profit
Time away from our friends, family, and rest
Time we will never get back

Michael Jackson
I saw you in a video yesterday
I'm sorry you were picked on by your dad and your brothers
If they had left you alone then you might not have cut up your face
You looked just fine the way you were
I remember your chimp named Bubbles
I guess adult chimps are too dangerous to have around so he had to go
You couldn't go out without being mobbed by fans
I'm a fan and I would know that you just need your space and I'd leave you alone
But so many people live their lives vicariously through their idols
So they pay large amounts of money to be near them
I don't need that kind of excitement
I enjoy you most when I sing to your songs in my car
That's better than any concert
So I hope you have been having fun in heaven
Teaching Jesus how to moonwalk and riding your own Zipper amusement ride

I have song I like to listen to at Halloween time
This was started back when I used to listen to the radio Halloween night
They would have scary stories and songs that were spooky
So here are some that I have enjoyed listening to at Halloween time:

Thriller by Michael Jackson
I Put A Spell On You by Screamin Jay Hawkins
Somebody's Watching Me by Rockwell
People Are Strange by The Doors
Werewolves of London by Warren Zevon
Monster Mash by Bobby "Boris" Pickett
Ghostbusters by Ray Parker Jr.
Nightmare On My Street by DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince
The Homecoming Queen's Got a Gun by Julie Brown
Du Hast by Rammstein
Batdance by Prince
The Cockroach That Ate Cincinatti by The Misfits
Hungry Like The Wolf by Duran Duran
Nature Trail To Hell by Wierd Al Yankovic
Clap For The Wolfman by Guess Who

I have a friend who loves word search
I try to make at least one every week
The way I make them is I play the movie and pick out words in the dialogue
The last one I made was the movie Seven
As I am on my Halloween movie watching
That lasts from September 15 til October 31
I am going to Joker tonight
My favorite quote from the movie Seven is
"Ernest Hemingway once wrote, the world is a fine place and worth fighting for
I agree with the second part"

Trump is in trouble
Could he quit or be taken out of office?
Is it going to be Nixon all over again?
If it does then we will have a Mike for president
Mike is a good name
Heck, it's a great name
President Mike
He seems like a nice guy
He seems smarter than Donald
So some day soon maybe, just maybe
We'll have to say
Hail President Mike!
Hail President Mike Pence!

I have just won the lottery of two million dollars. I say this as the money I recieved after the taxes were taken out. It has been about a year and you ask how much is left? Answer, I am broke, nothing is left. Where did it go? Here is where it went. New cars for my whole family, plus gas, insurance, repairs = 300,000 dollars. So now we are down to 1,700,000. So then it's eating out every meal for me and my friends = 40,000 dollars. New house and land = 1 million, so now we're down to 660,000 dollars. I gave 10% to the church, so that's 200,000 dollars, now we're down to 460,000 dollars. I got to pay my bills and I spent 1,000 dollars a day at Walmart, Cabelas, the Mall of America, etc. So there is where the rest went as well as 10 movies a week, popcorn, pop, etc. etc. So here I am 275 pounds, broke, my friends who I took along on this journey are all over 200 pounds as well and we are more miserable than ever. The lottery ruined my life, don't let it ruin yours!

I saw Tony the Tiger in a commercial
He said for every box of Kellogg's Frosted Flakes
Kellogg's would donate money for sports in schools
I grew up watching this guy during my Saturday morning cartoons
Toucan Sam, The Leprechaun, Sugar Bear, Cap'n Crunch were others
Along with Snap, Crackle, and Pop, from Rice Crispies
What do any of these cereals have to do with healthy living?
They are bad for kids, but I have to admit, I still enjoy them
The advertisers are clever people
But why are they allowed to peddle this crapola on tv?
The drug commercials are the worst
A lot of them claim better health
When if you eat right and exercise, you don't need them, or the side effects
They're greeaatt! advertisements, but not good ones for people